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'Optional' Service Charges


Bubba C

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It seems there are very few places where one can dine these days and decide whether or or to leave a tip, depending on the level of service received. 

Every fucking eatery I visit adds an 'optional' service charge to the bill. Not being a cheap cunt, I always arm myself with a few notes and coins in order to leave a tip if the service has been adequate, or if the waitress has been fit enough to want to fuck. 

This 'optional' charge is bollocks as it makes you look a right cunt asking to remove it, no matter how fucking ugly the waitress is, or shit the service has been. 

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1 hour ago, Bubbles said:

It seems there are very few places where one can dine these days and decide whether or or to leave a tip, depending on the level of service received. 

Every fucking eatery I visit adds an 'optional' service charge to the bill. Not being a cheap cunt, I always arm myself with a few notes and coins in order to leave a tip if the service has been adequate, or if the waitress has been fit enough to want to fuck. 

This 'optional' charge is bollocks as it makes you look a right cunt asking to remove it, no matter how fucking ugly the waitress is, or shit the service has been. 

You have to be careful because you may go back and they'll remember. And you don't want the maître d adding anything to your chasseur sauce.

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Guest luke swarm
2 hours ago, Bubbles said:

It seems there are very few places where one can dine these days and decide whether or or to leave a tip, depending on the level of service received. 

Every fucking eatery I visit adds an 'optional' service charge to the bill. Not being a cheap cunt, I always arm myself with a few notes and coins in order to leave a tip if the service has been adequate, or if the waitress has been fit enough to want to fuck. 

This 'optional' charge is bollocks as it makes you look a right cunt asking to remove it, no matter how fucking ugly the waitress is, or shit the service has been. 

outrageous Bubba....... They should not be charging you at all Bubba...I gave those cunts a twenty at Christmas and now I hear this,,,,,I tell you those Sally army hostels in Cwmbran are really just beyond the pale. 

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
3 hours ago, Bubbles said:

It seems there are very few places where one can dine these days and decide whether or or to leave a tip, depending on the level of service received. 

Every fucking eatery I visit adds an 'optional' service charge to the bill. Not being a cheap cunt, I always arm myself with a few notes and coins in order to leave a tip if the service has been adequate, or if the waitress has been fit enough to want to fuck. 

This 'optional' charge is bollocks as it makes you look a right cunt asking to remove it, no matter how fucking ugly the waitress is, or shit the service has been. 

Bubbles, this is well fucking identified: a Cuntish practice indeed. Another disgusting American habit adopted by fucking theives on Blighty. Not only is it tight as fuck for wanks over here to slap on service charge with no guarantee that service staff get it - they usually don't get it all here- to add a second tier to this shite is fucking terrible. Though they've imported this yank habit, at least there it's absolutely for the staff - they rely on it , and are incentivised by it. These fucksmokers have adopted it but are fucking keeping it! Horrendous cunts! Trades descriptions act , you cunts - if it is not for service staff, but for the company - how much is a burger ? How much is a steak? What is the price ? Fuck off.

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31 minutes ago, luke swarm said:

outrageous Bubba....... They should not be charging you at all Bubba...I gave those cunts a twenty at Christmas and now I hear this,,,,,I tell you those Sally army hostels in Cwmbran are really just beyond the pale. 

Cwmbranistan is a fucking massive shit hole, Lucas. Even Spotters wouldn't go there, and he's from Pontypool. 

Unfortunately, my birth place is not too far away from these vile places, but at least I've moved away to somewhere semi-respectable.

And I can't see a fucking bungalow for miles. 

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
3 minutes ago, Bubbles said:

Cwmbranistan is a fucking massive shit hole, Lucas. Even Spotters wouldn't go there, and he's from Pontypool. 

Unfortunately, my birth place is not too far away from these vile places, but at least I've moved away to somewhere semi-respectable.

And I can't see a fucking bungalow for miles. 

Most dumps are born in the toilet , and move, through the local authority sewer system, to the sea. Have you a sea view? I'm not implying anything. 

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12 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

Most dumps are born in the toilet , and move, through the local authority sewer system, to the sea. Have you a sea view? I'm not implying anything. 

Almost, I can smell it.  Although that fishy aroma may just be your wife's axe wound, LOL. 

Oh no, I've said too much. 

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Guest Bill Stickers
Just now, Bubbles said:

You fucking posh prick, William. Why not just go all out and have a dirty protest on the walls of The Harvester you were in?

I'm already banned from The Harvester off the M40 after the infamous salad bar love eggs incident of 2006. I don't venture any further than that anonymous strip of motorway. 

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39 minutes ago, Bubbles said:

Cwmbranistan is a fucking massive shit hole, Lucas. Even Spotters wouldn't go there, and he's from Pontypool. 

Unfortunately, my birth place is not too far away from these vile places, but at least I've moved away to somewhere semi-respectable.

And I can't see a fucking bungalow for miles. 

I like bungalows. Not far to climb for the lead.

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No cunt tips me in my job and I wouldn't fucking expect it,i never tip,I fucking expect a good plate of nosh and served the right way,they're a fucking restuarant for christs sake,that is their trade,their speciality.I'm not a tight cunt I just dont pay extra for what I went for,fuck 'em

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Guest nobgobbler
1 hour ago, Bill Stickers said:

I just had to pay one of these charges at lunch. I left skid marks in their shitter as revenge. 

Did you enjoy your McNuggets though?

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Guest luke swarm
2 minutes ago, neil298 said:

No cunt tips me in my job 

Yes Neil but restaurants are a service industry.....it is customary to show ones appreciation if particularly good service or food has been dispensed. You don't have to but it is customary.

My point being that it would be stretching this a bit far to offer a tip to someone in your occupation. It is not customary to offer monetary tips to minor officials in the STD clinic as far as I am aware. I trust that has clarified the situation.

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Guest Bill Stickers
1 minute ago, Bubbles said:

Quince, Drew liked this. Raise the fucking bar, sharpish. 

ProfB is online. Any bar is about to get lowered at great speed. Hopefully a crowbar on its fucking head. 

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Guest luke swarm
1 minute ago, Bill Stickers said:

ProfB is online. . 

quick all you cunts Log OFF Log OFF...this is a DefCon 1 situation........it may think no one is home and just fuck off. 

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