Small Aircraft Pilots

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

First, this is NOT a thread for slating r/c enthusiasts. Anybody who does so is a stupid fucking cunt, take it to the open corner. 

These fuckholes are colossal cunts. They think they're Han fucking Solo, and can make an epic flight around a city centre in less than 12 parsecs. They compare their single engine Cessna abilities to handling a long range bomber. 

I want their jaws surgically closed with barbed wire then through a 747 engine in full throttle. 

Cunts

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

There is a small airfield near me where there are many of those types. They had an airshow there for many years until one such type decided to stop his Hawker Hunter at a red light on the A27 killing 11 men watching the reckless pilot coming at them. I think that pilot represents exactly the type you mention, just a shame he was in a fast jet and not flying a model, which in my opinion is all he should have been allowed to fly.

Helicopters look too much like hard work.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

What the fuck is wrong with someone being a vertically challenged aircraft pilot? I do not see why a 4 foot tall person should not be able to fly a suitably adapted aircraft. Next you will be trying to tell us that the Japanese should not have been flying aircraft in the second world war because they at that time were not quite as tall as the rest of us.

[Jiggerycock]

Factory-installed arrogance from cunts who read too many 'Biggles' books as kids and who never grew the fuck up thereafter

[Guest Snatch]

2 hours ago, The Lady Penelope said:

What the fuck is wrong with someone being a vertically challenged aircraft pilot? I do not see why a 4 foot tall person should not be able to fly a suitably adapted aircraft. Next you will be trying to tell us that the Japanese should not have been flying aircraft in the second world war because they at that time were not quite as tall as the rest of us.

Most of the Japanese pilots ended up a lot smaller after they landed on a battleship.

[Guest Piston]

42 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

Factory-installed arrogance from cunts who read too many 'Biggles' books as kids and who never grew the fuck up thereafter

Character building literature, now sadly considered non PC.

I've still got all my copies; 'Biggles Flies Undone' and 'Biggles Kills the Fokkers' were the best.

Chocks Away

[Eric Cuntman]

39 minutes ago, Piston said:

Character building literature, now sadly considered non PC.

I've still got all my copies; 'Biggles Flies Undone' and 'Biggles Kills the Fokkers' were the best.

Chocks Away

I loved Biggles, someone should have continued and updated the work of Capt W.E Johns. 'Biggles skilfully made another strafing run,low across the desert floor, mentally clocking in another 6 dead ragheads, and taking the opportunity to light a Craven A off the burning headdress of a filthy terrorist as he swooped by. He and Algy couldn't help but chuckle at the tortured screams of the swarthy scum, as they pointed the kite skyward and headed back to HQ for breakfast.'

[Jiggerycock]

39 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I loved Biggles, someone should have continued and updated the work of Capt W.E Johns. 'Biggles skilfully made another strafing run,low across the desert floor, mentally clocking in another 6 dead ragheads, and taking the opportunity to light a Craven A off the burning headdress of a filthy terrorist as he swooped by. He and Algy couldn't help but chuckle at the tortured screams of the swarthy scum, as they pointed the kite skyward and headed back to HQ for breakfast.'

You think?

More like "Biggles completed the risk assessment form in line with the gender diversity training, before sagging off to Skibo Castle for the teambuilding exercise over lattes and protein shakes'

[Cuntybaws]

12 hours ago, Wizardsleeve said:

They compare their single engine Cessna abilities to handling a long range bomber. 

On the plus side, they do tend to crash into things quite a lot, evidence if more was needed of evolutionary biology in action.

[Jiggerycock]

22 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

On the plus side, they do tend to crash into things quite a lot, evidence if more was needed of evolutionary biology in action.

...or a momentary conversion to radical Islam?

 

[ratcum]

I fly and I'm not a cunt. It's also increasingly hard to crash unless you're a complete twat. All CA incidents are rigorously investigated and reports made public. The cause is invariably recorded as:

1. Twat
2. Twattery
3. The pilot was Welsh

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

1 minute ago, ratcum said:

I fly and I'm not a cunt. It's also increasingly hard to crash unless you're a complete twat. All CA incidents are rigorously investigated and reports made public. The cause is invariably recorded as:

1. Twat
2. Twattery
3. The pilot was Welsh

In your case I bet any landing you can walk away from is classed as a good one.

[ratcum]

1 minute ago, Alfie Noakes said:

In your case I bet any landing you can walk away from is classed as a good one.

'walk' has recently been downgraded (by me) to 'move'

Also, cunts who say they have 1000 hrs of experience show a lack of knowledge. The number of take-offs and landings, hours 'on type' and hours in the last month are far more important.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

22 minutes ago, ratcum said:

'walk' has recently been downgraded (by me) to 'move'

Also, cunts who say they have 1000 hrs of experience show a lack of knowledge. The number of take-offs and landings, hours 'on type' and hours in the last month are far more important.

What are your views on Andy Hill and his reckless behaviour?

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, ratcum said:

I fly and I'm not a cunt. It's also increasingly hard to crash unless you're a complete twat. All CA incidents are rigorously investigated and reports made public. The cause is invariably recorded as:

1. Twat
2. Twattery
3. The pilot was Welsh

4. Wobbly Spats

[ratcum]

55 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

What are your views on Andy Hill and his reckless behaviour?

He suffered a ‘G’ stall, where an aircraft stalls at a much higher speed than normal due to G forces. Air isn’t moving over the control surfaces and you’re basically fucked. You can anticipate  this as the loss of control is progressive, but he had no reserve of thrust to counteract the effect. I understand the engine had been wheezing even at take-off, which should have meant throwing the whole display away and landing asap. 

Military aircraft are not designed for hobby flying due to the demands of maintenance and associated logistics. Add to that the fact that it’s a jet, and you have issues of cumulative airframe stress. Some Russian privateers will take you to the edge of space in a Mig25 for £15,000 but I’d rather pour napalm down my urethra and call myself Guy.

[ratcum]

25 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

4. Wobbly Spats

How do know about spats you apron lubber? Have I been talking in my sleep Authoritah?

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

8 hours ago, The Lady Penelope said:

What the fuck is wrong with someone being a vertically challenged aircraft pilot? I do not see why a 4 foot tall person should not be able to fly a suitably adapted aircraft. Next you will be trying to tell us that the Japanese should not have been flying aircraft in the second world war because they at that time were not quite as tall as the rest of us.

Reported for racism against the nips. 

[Guest Piston]

2 hours ago, ratcum said:

I fly and I'm not a cunt. It's also increasingly hard to crash unless you're a complete twat. All CA incidents are rigorously investigated and reports made public. The cause is invariably recorded as:

1. Twat
2. Twattery
3. The pilot was Welsh

So...the major cause of air 'incidents' is Rick?

With Rickish behaviour a close second?

It's a fuckin' education this site is. Cheers Rattus

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

32 minutes ago, ratcum said:

He suffered a ‘G’ stall, where an aircraft stalls at a much higher speed than normal due to G forces. Air isn’t moving over the control surfaces and you’re basically fucked. You can anticipate  this as the loss of control is progressive, but he had no reserve of thrust to counteract the effect. I understand the engine had been wheezing even at take-off, which should have meant throwing the whole display away and landing asap. 

Military aircraft are not designed for hobby flying due to the demands of maintenance and associated logistics. Add to that the fact that it’s a jet, and you have issues of cumulative airframe stress. Some Russian privateers will take you to the edge of space in a Mig25 for £15,000 but I’d rather pour napalm down my urethra and call myself Guy.

Napalm down your urethra???  Fuck me ratters, you have a colourful imaginationn for dispensing pain. 

[Guest Piston]

1 minute ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Napalm down your urethra???  Fuck me ratters, you have a colourful imaginationn for dispensing pain. 

Ah but he comes like a Saturn V

[Eric Cuntman]

30 minutes ago, ratcum said:

How do know about spats you apron lubber? Have I been talking in my sleep Authoritah?

A grandfather who joined the Royal flying corps when he left school in 1917, and stayed on when it merged with the naval lot and became the RAF a year later, served throughout the Second World War and de-mobbed in the 50s. Got blown up at Biggin hill, met Bader a few times and spent hours telling me all about it when I was a kid. You do however talk, and snore in your sleep, but you usually stop when I attach a gypsies clothes peg to the end of your nob. 

[ratcum]

1 hour ago, Piston said:

So...the major cause of air 'incidents' is Rick?

With Rickish behaviour a close second?

It's a fuckin' education this site is. Cheers Rattus

Only my mum calls me by my Latin name.

[ratcum]

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

A grandfather who joined the Royal flying corps when he left school in 1917, and stayed on when it merged with the naval lot and became the RAF a year later, served throughout the Second World War and de-mobbed in the 50s. Got blown up at Biggin hill, met Bader a few times and spent hours telling me all about it when I was a kid. You do however talk, and snore in your sleep, but you usually stop when I attach a gypsies clothes peg to the end of your nob. 

I knew I'd been violated

[camberwell gypsy]

Some cunt's been flying a WW1 plane over the bay (I'm in Spain) advertising something about dolphins. Fuck dolphins, the smiley faced shits.