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Iam Ape

Getting On Stationery Escalators

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This always fucks with my mind. Despite it being clear that the cunting thing isn’t moving, I still find myself feeling off balance as I get on - a really strange sensation.

Fuck off.

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And tell me Ape, you simpering fuckwit, would you find these stationery escalators in Staples, WH Smiths or your local branch of The Works?

Stationary - not moving

Stationery - relating to paper and office materials.

Please keep up, Cunt. 

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26 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

And tell me Ape, you simpering fuckwit, would you find these stationery escalators in Staples, WH Smiths or your local branch of The Works?

Stationary - not moving

Stationery - relating to paper and office materials.

Please keep up, Cunt. 

He may be bigly into origami - you never know

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27 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

And tell me Ape, you simpering fuckwit, would you find these stationery escalators in Staples, WH Smiths or your local branch of The Works?

Stationary - not moving

Stationery - relating to paper and office materials.

Please keep up, Cunt. 

Fuck off knob. Stationary is relating to stations. Stationery, on the other hand, means relating to stations. Apes middle names are "Roget Collins Webster Cunt" and he doesn't need the intricacies of the England language explaining to him by the likes of us.

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1 hour ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

And tell me Ape, you simpering fuckwit, would you find these stationery escalators in Staples, WH Smiths or your local branch of The Works?

Stationary - not moving

Stationery - relating to paper and office materials.

Please keep up, Cunt. 

A simple spelling mistake generated by an iPhone autocorrect. We all know what the nom relates to, so why not, instead of trying to be clever, post something relevant to the topic? Or you could just go back to lurking in the shadows and contributing absolutely fuck all, like you’ve done since you joined in August.

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1 hour ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

And tell me Ape, you simpering fuckwit, would you find these stationery escalators in Staples, WH Smiths or your local branch of The Works?

Stationary - not moving

Stationery - relating to paper and office materials.

Please keep up, Cunt. 

You raise a fair point, borne from good observation, if a little irrelevant. But as Ape conveys, why lurk in the shadows for months and then, suddenly, launch what seems an unwarranted attack based on a typical computer error? Please explain yourself.

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45 minutes ago, Ape said:

A simple spelling mistake generated by an iPhone autocorrect. We all know what the nom relates to, so why not, instead of trying to be clever, post something relevant to the topic? Or you could just go back to lurking in the shadows and contributing absolutely fuck all, like you’ve done since you joined in August.

When all the cunts in the world have been killed or cured, he'll be the last cunt standing. 

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14 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

When all the cunts in the world have been killed or cured, he'll be the last cunt standing. 

Not here. Despite having lead in his pencil, I'll wager his attitude will quickly get him erased.

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38 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

When all the cunts in the world have been killed or cured, he'll be the last cunt standing. 

Let's do it gobs

 

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6 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

I have made this for you Ape. It is an escalator made of card that isn't moving. So it is a stationery stationary escalator.

large.escw2(1).jpg.3df0d2954d836973960579fcc5f2b15b.jpg

Reported for breach of health & safety legislation. The escalators at King Cross were made of wood and caught fire.

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15 hours ago, Ape said:

A simple spelling mistake generated by an iPhone autocorrect. We all know what the nom relates to, so why not, instead of trying to be clever, post something relevant to the topic? Or you could just go back to lurking in the shadows and contributing absolutely fuck all, like you’ve done since you joined in August.

Couldn't you simply use the edit function and then deny everything?

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57 minutes ago, nobgobbler said:

Well we all know what he does with his cheesy wotsits. 

I can see you, gobs... filling a full-length mirror in your off-the-shoulder oversized tropical fruit-print number. Tuesday night is Salsa night and you just can't believe the size of your bum, ugly skinny tits spilling out and under your arms, grey sprouting roots, and stupid jowly fuckung head. 

How about we spend a few days in New York together?

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27 minutes ago, Frank said:

I can see you, gobs... filling ia full-length mirror in your off-the-shoulder oversized tropical fruit-print number. Tuesday night is Salsa night and you just can't believe the size of your bum, ugly skinny tits spilling out and under your arms, grey sprouting roots, and stupid jowly fuckung head. 

How about we spend a few days in New York together?

You take that back right now you lying cunt. Salsa night is Thursday.

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20 hours ago, Ape said:

This always fucks with my mind. Despite it being clear that the cunting thing isn’t moving, I still find myself feeling off balance as I get on - a really strange sensation.

Fuck off.

No surprise about the ridiculous spelling in the title of this nomination but the actual subject matter of the nomination and raising it as issue is indeed bizarre.

Only a complete spastic wanker presents a topic such as this.The escalator “fucks with your mind”........Does it ?

Your psychiatrist is probably on the verge of ending it all.

You stupid fucking twat.

lol

 

Fuck off.

 

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5 minutes ago, Punkape said:

No surprise about the ridiculous spelling in the title of this nomination but the actual subject matter of the nomination and raising it as issue is indeed bizarre.

Only a complete spastic wanker presents a topic such as this.The escalator “fucks with your mind”........Does it ?

Your psychiatrist is probably on the verge of ending it all.

You stupid fucking twat.

lol

 

Fuck off.

 

Reported for escalating the thread off topic.

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2 hours ago, Frank said:

I can see you, gobs... filling a full-length mirror in your off-the-shoulder oversized tropical fruit-print number. Tuesday night is Salsa night and you just can't believe the size of your bum, ugly skinny tits spilling out and under your arms, grey sprouting roots, and stupid jowly fuckung head. 

How about we spend a few days in New York together?

Frank, I'm feeling really low. Roops just called me Bill Stupid in the Open Corner.

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47 minutes ago, William T.D. Stickers said:

Frank, I'm feeling really low. Roops just called me Bill Stupid in the Open Corner.

I think you should rise to it.. she needs a good kick up the cunt. Sartorially speaking, she knows her shit.. I was phisycally sick over her snidey barb this morning. Unlike you, I don't have the intellect to defend myself. 

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2 minutes ago, Frank said:

I think you should rise to it.. she needs a good kick up the cunt. Sartorially speaking, she knows her shit. I was phisycally sick over her snidey barb this morning. Unlike you, I don't have the intellect to defend myself. 

Hey Frank! I imagine replacing Poppy Day with Puppy Day? You could still pin the little fuckers to your lapels and show respect but I think the minute's silence wouldn't be on the cards.

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2 minutes ago, ratcum said:

Hey Frank! I imagine replacing Poppy Day with Puppy Day? You could still pin the little fuckers to your lapels and show respect but I think the minute's silence wouldn't be on the cards.

Rat I'm not trying to make a statement by ignoring you. It's just shit after shit and I don't know how to respond anymore. 

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33 minutes ago, Frank said:

I think you should rise to it.. she needs a good kick up the cunt. Sartorially speaking, she knows her shit.. I was phisycally sick over her snidey barb this morning. Unlike you, I don't have the intellect to defend myself. 

Reported for abusing Admin.

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