scotty Posted October 6, 2018 Report Share Posted October 6, 2018 Every mobile I've ever owned has come with dire warnings in the instructions about the consequences of overcharging the battery. Nowadays, the newer breeds have built-in software which attempts to predict the time at which you'll likely plug it in, how long before you unplug it, then use this information to slow down the charging speed so the battery reaches full charge when you're usually going to unplug it. Alternatively, you can buy an external timer to switch off the power supply after the recommended two hour maximum. As a confirmed Luddite, can some geek explain to me why five hundred quids worth of hi-tech micro electronics can't just turn off it's own charging circuit when the battery is fully charged? Why do we need all this complicated software to second guess our habits, and probably leave the fucking thing uncharged at the time we're most likely to really need it (ie when you have an unusually early start to the day?) I've got a couple of twenty-five quid bluetooth speakers which do just that, so the technology can't be expensive. Rant over. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 6, 2018 Report Share Posted October 6, 2018 3 minutes ago, scotty said: Every mobile I've ever owned has come with dire warnings in the instructions about the consequences of overcharging the battery. Nowadays, the newer breeds have built-in software which attempts to predict the time at which you'll likely plug it in, how long before you unplug it, then use this information to slow down the charging speed so the battery reaches full charge when you're usually going to unplug it. Alternatively, you can buy an external timer to switch off the power supply after the recommended two hour maximum. As a confirmed Luddite, can some geek explain to me why five hundred quids worth of hi-tech micro electronics can't just turn off it's own charging circuit when the battery is fully charged? Why do we need all this complicated software to second guess our habits, and probably leave the fucking thing uncharged at the time we're most likely to really need it (ie when you have an unusually early start to the day?) I've got a couple of twenty-five quid bluetooth speakers which do just that, so the technology can't be expensive. Rant over. It's the irony of humanity. We can build a machine that can land us on the moon and bring us back safely, but we can't make a teapot that doesn't drip. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted October 6, 2018 Report Share Posted October 6, 2018 A modern mobile phone can be charged as long as you want. Once the battery is full the charging electronics will reduce to a trickle, which will be just enough to power the phone. Stick the fucker on charge Scotters, and let the cunting electrons flow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Roops Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 8 hours ago, Iam Ape said: A modern mobile phone can be charged as long as you want. Once the battery is full the charging electronics will reduce to a trickle, which will be just enough to power the phone. Stick the fucker on charge Scotters, and let the cunting electrons flow. Indeed, not really an issue these days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 A bigger annoyance is that my blackberries charge would would give me at least two days of use .. since then I have had iPhones, Windoze phones and Androids that are on their last gasp half way through the day and of course everything uses five time more data to the same job it could do with 250 meg five years ago because of all these useless updates that they keep doing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 7, 2018 Author Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 10 hours ago, Iam Ape said: A modern mobile phone can be charged as long as you want. Once the battery is full the charging electronics will reduce to a trickle, which will be just enough to power the phone. Stick the fucker on charge Scotters, and let the cunting electrons flow. 2 hours ago, Mrs Roops said: Indeed, not really an issue these days. So why do the cunts at Sony bother with all this battery care bollocks? 🤔 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 10 minutes ago, scotty said: So why do the cunts at Sony bother with all this battery care bollocks? 🤔 No idea - my phone (iPhone) goes on charge at night and stays on charge all night - it’s my alarm clock too. I’ve been doing this for approaching three years and the phone is absolutely fine. If Sony expect people to wake up in the middle of the night to unplug their phones, then they’re a bunch of fucking cunts. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 26 minutes ago, scotty said: So why do the cunts at Sony bother with all this battery care bollocks? 🤔 I have been using a Sony phone for the last year and half and have not read or seen this bollox anywhere. Perhaps it something that they are saying to cover themselves in case some one get killed by an exploding battery. These type of warnings have been around for years. I have a neigbour who bought a Ford Ecoboost car because he was worried about hybrid car batteries exploding. His Ecoboost has just joined the list of Ford Ecoboosts that have caught fire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 12 hours ago, scotty said: Every mobile I've ever owned has come with dire warnings in the instructions about the consequences of overcharging the battery. Nowadays, the newer breeds have built-in software which attempts to predict the time at which you'll likely plug it in, how long before you unplug it, then use this information to slow down the charging speed so the battery reaches full charge when you're usually going to unplug it. Alternatively, you can buy an external timer to switch off the power supply after the recommended two hour maximum. As a confirmed Luddite, can some geek explain to me why five hundred quids worth of hi-tech micro electronics can't just turn off it's own charging circuit when the battery is fully charged? Why do we need all this complicated software to second guess our habits, and probably leave the fucking thing uncharged at the time we're most likely to really need it (ie when you have an unusually early start to the day?) I've got a couple of twenty-five quid bluetooth speakers which do just that, so the technology can't be expensive. Rant over. You read instruction books, Scotters? Why? Haven't you got owt better to read? Surely you can't have read every copy of Razzle, Club International, Knave, Knave Readers' Wives, Fiesta, Fiesta Readers' Wives, Penthouse, Hustler, Fat And Forty, Fat And Fifty, Fat And Sixty, Fat Smelly And Dead, Escort Shaven Haven Specials, Moustachioed Asian Babes, Big Black And Bouncy, Bloaters Monthly, Derrière and The Economist? No bloke reads the instructions. You're supposed to turn your new toy on, fuck about with the buttons - without a single fucking clue as to what you're doing - before throwing the thing to one side and declaring it to be a pile of Frank. Then picking up a well thumbed copy of Anal Teen Ravers and subjecting your penis to a frenzied stress wank. Man up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 7, 2018 Author Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 2 hours ago, Ollyboro said: You read instruction books, Scotters? Why? Haven't you got owt better to read? Surely you can't have read every copy of Razzle, Club International, Knave, Knave Readers' Wives, Fiesta, Fiesta Readers' Wives, Penthouse, Hustler, Fat And Forty, Fat And Fifty, Fat And Sixty, Fat Smelly And Dead, Escort Shaven Haven Specials, Moustachioed Asian Babes, Big Black And Bouncy, Bloaters Monthly, Derrière and The Economist? No bloke reads the instructions. You're supposed to turn your new toy on, fuck about with the buttons - without a single fucking clue as to what you're doing - before throwing the thing to one side and declaring it to be a pile of Frank. Then picking up a well thumbed copy of Anal Teen Ravers and subjecting your penis to a frenzied stress wank. Man up. Noted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 10 hours ago, Wybunbury Bertie said: A bigger annoyance is that my blackberries charge would would give me at least two days of use .. since then I have had iPhones, Windoze phones and Androids that are on their last gasp half way through the day and of course everything uses five time more data to the same job it could do with 250 meg five years ago because of all these useless updates that they keep doing. Have you thought about seeing if the battery from your 20" anal battering ram could be used as backup? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 2 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Have you thought about seeing if the battery from your 20" anal battering ram could be used as backup? No, you needed to replace your own 40" anal battering ram remember. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 36 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Have you thought about seeing if the battery from your 20" anal battering ram could be used as backup? You soppy cunt wolfman; pens arse batterer is 2 Stroke 34 minutes ago, Wybunbury Bertie said: No, you needed to replace your own 40" anal battering ram remember. Great come back you fucking spastic cunt 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 37 minutes ago, Wolfie said: Have you thought about seeing if the battery from your 20" anal battering ram could be used as backup? Punkape's currently borrowing it for his turbo powered, water cooled fuel injected buttplug. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 22 hours ago, scotty said: Every mobile I've ever owned has come with dire warnings in the instructions about the consequences of overcharging the battery. Nowadays, the newer breeds have built-in software which attempts to predict the time at which you'll likely plug it in, how long before you unplug it, then use this information to slow down the charging speed so the battery reaches full charge when you're usually going to unplug it. Alternatively, you can buy an external timer to switch off the power supply after the recommended two hour maximum. As a confirmed Luddite, can some geek explain to me why five hundred quids worth of hi-tech micro electronics can't just turn off it's own charging circuit when the battery is fully charged? Why do we need all this complicated software to second guess our habits, and probably leave the fucking thing uncharged at the time we're most likely to really need it (ie when you have an unusually early start to the day?) I've got a couple of twenty-five quid bluetooth speakers which do just that, so the technology can't be expensive. Rant over. Scotty, admitting that you read the instructions for anything is an outright admission of homosexuality. It's just not something a right footer does, old chap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 7, 2018 Report Share Posted October 7, 2018 1 hour ago, DrCunt said: Scotty, admitting that you read the instructions for anything is an outright admission of homosexuality. It's just not something a right footer does, old chap. @scotty is this true? Have you been taking excursions sausage-side? I hope all this wanton buggery doesn't distract you from the duty of care to your elderly patients. A lapse in concentration could lead to you administering the correct dose of morphine. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 8, 2018 Author Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 9 hours ago, DrCunt said: Scotty, admitting that you read the instructions for anything is an outright admission of homosexuality. It's just not something a right footer does, old chap. 7 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: @scotty is this true? Have you been taking excursions sausage-side? I hope all this wanton buggery doesn't distract you from the duty of care to your elderly patients. A lapse in concentration could lead to you administering the correct dose of morphine. I can see why this would appear on the face of it to be a fair cop lads, but I can reassure you that my, ahem, personal life is complicated enough already without the introduction of any same-sex shenanigans. I can only defend my pathetic adherence to instruction manuals by pointing out that I've been indoctrinated into it by my soon to be ex wife. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 5 hours ago, scotty said: I can see why this would appear on the face of it to be a fair cop lads, but I can reassure you that my, ahem, personal life is complicated enough already without the introduction of any same-sex shenanigans. I can only defend my pathetic adherence to instruction manuals by pointing out that I've been indoctrinated into it by my soon to be ex wife. Is she one of your patients then? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 10 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: Is she one of your patients then? No, she's transitioning. She's accepted Scotty's poofy addiction to instruction manuals and thought "fuck it; may as well get a cock and become his husband." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 On 10/7/2018 at 12:15 AM, Iam Ape said: A modern mobile phone can be charged as long as you want. Once the battery is full the charging electronics will reduce to a trickle, which will be just enough to power the phone. Stick the fucker on charge Scotters, and let the cunting electrons flow. Do you mean like Gyps' fanny arousal fluid, which is no longer required to the same quantities her once-youthful occupation demanded? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 On 10/6/2018 at 6:28 PM, scotty said: Every mobile I've ever owned has come with dire warnings in the instructions about the consequences of overcharging the battery. Nowadays, the newer breeds have built-in software which attempts to predict the time at which you'll likely plug it in, how long before you unplug it, then use this information to slow down the charging speed so the battery reaches full charge when you're usually going to unplug it. Alternatively, you can buy an external timer to switch off the power supply after the recommended two hour maximum. As a confirmed Luddite, can some geek explain to me why five hundred quids worth of hi-tech micro electronics can't just turn off it's own charging circuit when the battery is fully charged? Why do we need all this complicated software to second guess our habits, and probably leave the fucking thing uncharged at the time we're most likely to really need it (ie when you have an unusually early start to the day?) I've got a couple of twenty-five quid bluetooth speakers which do just that, so the technology can't be expensive. Rant over. Follow the money Scotto! If we charge the fucking things to the point of explosion, the greedy manufacturers can set fire to the world from the friction of them rubbing their grubby little hands together in expectation of record sales of their next pile of shit product heading to the market! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 2 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: Follow the money Scotto! If we charge the fucking things to the point of explosion, the greedy manufacturers can set fire to the world from the friction of them rubbing their grubby little hands together in expectation of record sales of their next pile of shit product heading to the market! How do you milk a sheep? launch the new iPhone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted October 8, 2018 Report Share Posted October 8, 2018 1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said: How do you milk a sheep? launch the new iPhone I want the fucking things to have tougher touch screens. You glare at the cunting things in a way they disapprove, and they fucking well shatter. Think you were clever buying the protection insurance? The bastards send you a refurbished lump of shit to replace the brand new one you purchased not a month prior. I want them all destroyed and the designers dead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted January 21, 2019 Author Report Share Posted January 21, 2019 I thought as fucking much....... https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/technology-46826795/ces-2019-smart-socket-to-charge-your-devices 😠😠 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted January 21, 2019 Report Share Posted January 21, 2019 On 10/7/2018 at 6:09 AM, scotty said: So why do the cunts at Sony bother with all this battery care bollocks? 🤔 I'm not a micro electronic engineer, Scotto, but I think it has something to do with Sony being utter shit. Just a guess, mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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