Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 There is a weird variant of the midlife crisis that involves British cunts suddenly getting a rager for American shit. They start listening to boring, whining Americana music like Wilco and the Dixie Chicks and they start collecting obscure makes of Bourbon whiskey; which invariably taste disgusting. They fill their houses with Highway 66 and Elvis-themed tat and start wearing those horrid pinstriped rockabilly shirts. They buy deluxe edition Fender Stratocaster guitars and then bore everybody around them with terrible renditions of the song Wagon Wheel. They go to fucking terrible American car festivals and waddle around speaking faux yank and swigging a 'Bud'. They waste hundreds of pounds going to see bands that all looks and sound exactly the same, and who sing about things these people can't even begin to relate to. And these cunts are all British. We have our own history and culture, and one which is older than 250 years and has a bit going on than mobsters, derivative twangy music, shit booze, ugly cars and poverty cooking that relies on furiously strong flavours to disguise cheap and low quality cuts of meat. These turncoats are utter cunts. This cunt is probably an IT consultant from Harrogate. I see he's traded the wife in for a younger model now that the kids are in uni. Cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 33 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: There is a weird variant of the midlife crisis that involves British cunts suddenly getting a rager for American shit. They start listening to boring, whining Americana music like Wilco and the Dixie Chicks and they start collecting obscure makes of Bourbon whiskey; which invariably taste disgusting. They fill their houses with Highway 66 and Elvis-themed tat and start wearing those horrid pinstriped rockabilly shirts. They buy deluxe edition Fender Stratocaster guitars and then bore everybody around them with terrible renditions of the song Wagon Wheel. They go to fucking terrible American car festivals and waddle around speaking faux yank and swigging a 'Bud'. They waste hundreds of pounds going to see bands that all looks and sound exactly the same, and who sing about things these people can't even begin to relate to. And these cunts are all British. We have our own history and culture, and one which is older than 250 years and has a bit going on than mobsters, derivative twangy music, shit booze, ugly cars and poverty cooking that relies on furiously strong flavours to disguise cheap and low quality cuts of meat. These turncoats are utter cunts. This cunt is probably an IT consultant from Harrogate. I see he's traded the wife in for a younger model now that the kids are in uni. Cunt. Dan! You haven't been missed. On the subject of ho'downs, I take umbrage with the term "British". Afterall, isn't this shit more prevalent north of the border? You can't pick and choose when you define yourself as British, you Claymore wielding idiot. This is a purely Scottish phenomenon. Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't the Ku Klux Klan founded in the most part by descendants of Scottish immigrants? Take your spurs and plastic Winchester rifle replica and shove them up your fucking arse. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 2 minutes ago, Decimus said: Dan! You haven't been missed. On the subject of ho'downs, I take umbrage with the term "British". Afterall, isn't this shit more prevalent north of the border? You can't pick and choose when you define yourself as British, you Claymore wielding idiot. This is a purely Scottish phenomenon. Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't the Ku Klux Klan founded in the most part by descendants of Scottish immigrants? Take your spurs and plastic Winchester rifle replica and shove them up your fucking arse. The Scottish had a reputation in the old west. Legendary bandits such as Ben Doon and Phil MaCavity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 If anybody mentions Billy the Kid, they can consider themselves reported. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 Reached its apotheosis last weekend, whre some cunts hosted and went to Superbowl parties! Jesus if you're part of that knee-jerk CC untermensch that think 'football is for irons', wait until you get a load of this yank horseshit - yet somehow we're not only meant to be intersted in it but build an entire social event around the Tallahsee Arswipes playing the Anchorage Onanists. Yee haw, cousinfuckers! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 4 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: The Scottish had a reputation in the old west. Legendary bandits such as Ben Doon and Phil MaCavity. There was a famous native American chief who had Scots ancestry. He was called Hawkeye the noo. I'll get me breech clout. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cap'n Cunt Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 (edited) 51 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: There was a famous native American chief who had Scots ancestry. He was called Ocheye the noo. I'll get me breech clout. Hawkeye the noo, you fucking spaz. And while I'm here @Mrs Roops why was my Banana Bunch nom deleted? Was it because I ....... Edited February 5, 2019 by Mrs Roops Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Roops Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 9 minutes ago, Cap'n Cunt said: Hawkeye the noo, you fucking spaz. And while I'm here @Mrs Roops why was my Banana Bunch nom deleted? Was it because I ....... Yes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 On 05/02/2019 at 18:00, Cuntybaws said: If anybody mentions Billy the Kid, they can consider themselves reported. Billy the Kid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 Don't forget the multitude of american wankers on youtube who micro analyse every single little thing Britain does and upload videos to youtube trying to compare themselves to us, no no.. just fuck off we have fuck all in common with you fucked up god bothering, hot dog guzzling, baseball cap back to front wearing, "accent' obsessed, shit sports watching fucking cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 And the thick flow of Yankee pundits on BBC Radio News and Sky who have their fair tuppence on anything British or brexit. That Kate Andrews with her obnoxious fried Yankee voice from the IEA who tells US what OUR papers say! Cunt. Needs a good rodeo to sort her out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 56 minutes ago, Cap'n Cunt said: Hawkeye the noo, you fucking spaz. And while I'm here @Mrs Roops why was my Banana Bunch nom deleted? Was it because I ....... Noted and edited Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 Good nom. Norfolk is an entire county trying to ape Uncle Sam. They still have CB radio for fuck's sake. The Pope has had sex with slaves too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Arthur Fuqs-Aches Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 4 hours ago, Decimus said: Dan! You haven't been missed. On the subject of ho'downs, I take umbrage with the term "British". Afterall, isn't this shit more prevalent north of the border? You can't pick and choose when you define yourself as British, you Claymore wielding idiot. This is a purely Scottish phenomenon. Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't the Ku Klux Klan founded in the most part by descendants of Scottish immigrants? Take your spurs and plastic Winchester rifle replica and shove them up your fucking arse. Spurs and replica rifles? Now you're glorifying trouble on the terraces Decimus. Stop your ambiguity you cunt and stop insulting the Klan while your at it. Scotland, pfft, honestly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Arthur Fuqs-Aches Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 Suprised there are no other noms of this irritating phenomenon. It has crept in under Tony Blair's ruinous tenure and been thoughtlessly 'embraced' (fuck off) by a generation of students and their stupid parents and now, for fucks sake, everywhere you go it's 'Hi Guys' this and 'Have a nice day' that. Even Tescos seem to have told their staff to say 'Enjoy the rest of your evening'. That's a tweaked version for us long-suffering Brits and appropriate for the British public cliniucally depresse (all of you cunts), skint, divorced and with 8 bottles of Weston's Vintage in the basket. Bye guys. Muttering 'cunts' under my breath. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 1 hour ago, Crab said: Billy the Kid You're dead fucking meat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 4 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: You're dead fucking meat. I remember Billy The Yid .. he was kosher. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 1 hour ago, EreptileDysfunction said: Don't forget the multitude of american wankers on youtube who micro analyse every single little thing Britain does and upload videos to youtube trying to compare themselves to us, no no.. just fuck off we have fuck all in common with you fucked up god bothering, hot dog guzzling, baseball cap back to front wearing, "accent' obsessed, shit sports watching fucking cunts. You're a fan of Alistair Cooke then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 1 hour ago, Arthur Fuqs-Aches said: Suprised there are no other noms of this irritating phenomenon. It has crept in under Tony Blair's ruinous tenure and been thoughtlessly 'embraced' (fuck off) by a generation of students and their stupid parents and now, for fucks sake, everywhere you go it's 'Hi Guys' this and 'Have a nice day' that. Even Tescos seem to have told their staff to say 'Enjoy the rest of your evening'. That's a tweaked version for us long-suffering Brits and appropriate for the British public cliniucally depresse (all of you cunts), skint, divorced and with 8 bottles of Weston's Vintage in the basket. Bye guys. Muttering 'cunts' under my breath. Arthur, whilst judging your recent efforts, it's become apparent to me that you have either unlocked the secrets of time travel, or you haven't left your wendy house since 1976. If it's the former, rewind to 56 minutes ago when you posted this, and strangle your past self to death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 54 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: You're a fan of Alistair Cooke then? There is cunt that walks around Torquay dressed as a cowboy and wears snakeskin boots .. I am sure that he is a bender. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 11 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: If anybody mentions Billy the Kid, they can consider themselves reported. What about Oor Wullie the Kid? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 10 hours ago, ratcum said: Good nom. Norfolk is an entire county trying to ape Uncle Sam. They still have CB radio for fuck's sake. The Pope has had sex with slaves too. Abraham Lincoln was descended from good Norfolk stock and he freed all the blacks. We've got a lot to answer for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 21 minutes ago, Decimus said: Abraham Lincoln was descended from good Norfolk stock and he freed all the blacks. We've got a lot to answer for. He also stopped a bullet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: What about Oor Wullie the Kid? Jings! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 5 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: Jings! Decs is of Irish descent so is he really "of Norfolk" .. a man can be born in a stable but is not a horse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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