Guest Ollyboro Posted March 1, 2019 Report Share Posted March 1, 2019 (edited) No, I don't have a bidet. Let's say there are a million bidets in Britain (pre-Brexit# getting our anuses wet) how many of them do you reckon get used daily? I don't think anycunt who owns a bidet actually uses one. About 20 years ago, my mate allowed his wife to spend a few grand on a new bathroom suite. Anyway, after a night on the piss, he staggered back into his house - the evening his bathroom suite had been fitted- and promptly had a shit in his new bidet. He'd confused it with an actual toilet. Anyhow, he's no longer married to the bidet bitch, although he still lives in the same house. I think he's got rid of the turd, the wife but not the bidet. Never used the bidet since. Edited March 1, 2019 by Ollyboro Cancer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 14 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: No, I don't have a bidet. Let's say there are a million bidets in Britain (pre-Brexit# getting our anuses wet) how many of them do you reckon get used daily? I don't think anycunt who owns a bidet actually uses one. About 20 years ago, my mate allowed his wife to spend a few grand on a new bathroom suite. Anyway, after a night on the piss, he staggered back into his house - the evening his bathroom suite had been fitted- and promptly had a shit in his new bidet. He'd confused it with an actual toilet. Anyhow, he's no longer married to the bidet bitch, although he still lives in the same house. I think he's got rid of the turd, the wife but not the bidet. Never used the bidet since. When one lays a particularly nasty cable and it ends smeared half way up your back through careless wiping the only polite thing to do is to get out the garden sprinkler or have the wife blast off the offending tag nuts with the hose pipe. The correct, British way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 19 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: No, I don't have a bidet. Let's say there are a million bidets in Britain (pre-Brexit# getting our anuses wet) how many of them do you reckon get used daily? I don't think anycunt who owns a bidet actually uses one. About 20 years ago, my mate allowed his wife to spend a few grand on a new bathroom suite. Anyway, after a night on the piss, he staggered back into his house - the evening his bathroom suite had been fitted- and promptly had a shit in his new bidet. He'd confused it with an actual toilet. Anyhow, he's no longer married to the bidet bitch, although he still lives in the same house. I think he's got rid of the turd, the wife but not the bidet. Never used the bidet since. Are you Peter Kay's script writer? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 39 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said: When one lays a particularly nasty cable and it ends smeared half way up your back through careless wiping the only polite thing to do is to get out the garden sprinkler or have the wife blast off the offending tag nuts with the hose pipe. The correct, British way. I'm uncomfortable with the Punkape like aspect of having any type of hose near my back side! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 50 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Are you Peter Kay's script writer? Are you his muse? Awful response. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 (edited) I've never used a bidet either, mainly because my hand - (brown?) eye coordination is a bit more developed than that of a retarded chimp and I'm not as fat as an over inflated blimp....I mean, my arms aren't too short for my body. Pile of messy shit nom??! Edited March 2, 2019 by Cunty BigBollox Aries Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 Nonsense, the bidet represents the only contribution to civilised society that the french have ever made. Every bathroom should have one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 @King Billy and @Crab need bidets for all the shit that gets regurgitated from their stupid fucking mouths. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 4 minutes ago, EreptileDysfunction said: @King Billy and @Crab need bidets for all the shit that gets regurgitated from their stupid fucking mouths. Don't wake them up, for fucksake. I couldn't endure another evening of their spasticated drivel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Erroreptile404 Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 6 minutes ago, scotty said: Don't wake them up, for fucksake. I couldn't endure another evening of their spasticated drivel. True! i apologise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 1 hour ago, EreptileDysfunction said: True! i apologise. 🤮 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 2 hours ago, scotty said: Don't wake them up, for fucksake. I couldn't endure another evening of their spasticated drivel. Scotty I'm glad you're following me - but not after closing time in the dark. It's a bit creepy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 1 minute ago, Crab said: Scotty I'm glad you're following me - but not after closing time in the dark. It's a bit creepy. I'm doing my level best to avoid you, cretin. But given the sheer tedious volume of your inane output it isn't easy. Do us all a favour, slit billy's throat and then kill yourself. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 1 minute ago, scotty said: I'm doing my level best to avoid you, cretin. But given the sheer tedious volume of your inane output it isn't easy. Do us all a favour, slit billy's throat and then kill yourself. Scotty you used to be my weird friend, i. e. my step brother's fuck buddy. So I am slightly miffed by your comments. (He he he) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 Fuck everybody and eat my Bitcoin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 4 minutes ago, scotty said: I'm doing my level best to avoid you, cretin. But given the sheer tedious volume of your inane output it isn't easy. Do us all a favour, slit billy's throat and then kill yourself. I predict a Rothers style public meltdown for this deformed idiot Grotto. The poor sap doesn't have the intellectual capacity to cut it on here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 The bottom line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 2 minutes ago, ratcum said: I predict a Rothers style public meltdown for this deformed idiot Grotto. The poor sap doesn't have the intellectual capacity to cut it on here. I'm fuckin sick of cunts who aren't lesbians joining up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 1 minute ago, ratcum said: I predict a Rothers style public meltdown for this deformed idiot Grotto. The poor sap doesn't have the intellectual capacity to cut it on here. I'm not usually one to delve too deeply into the somewhat nepotistic "likes" system ratty, but you have to admit that in crab we have a rival for pen. He'll get the message sooner or later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 2 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: I'm fuckin sick of cunts who aren't lesbians joining up. A young boy once saved hundreds of people by putting his finger in a dike Authotitah. It's the key to saving this site. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 29 minutes ago, scotty said: I'm doing my level best to avoid you, cretin. But given the sheer tedious volume of your inane output it isn't easy. Do us all a favour, slit billy's throat and then kill yourself. The crabs output makes Pen look like an occasional contributor. It’s fucking relentless. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 42 minutes ago, scotty said: I'm doing my level best to avoid you, cretin. But given the sheer tedious volume of your inane output it isn't easy. Do us all a favour, slit billy's throat and then kill yourself. I think I've found a solution for this King Crab combo: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 2, 2019 Report Share Posted March 2, 2019 1 hour ago, Iam Ape said: The crabs output makes Pen look like an occasional contributor. It’s fucking relentless. The current crop are fucking awful dapps, truly dreadful, the albert and pen show have more laughs in them than this lot. Somewhere in the UK an asylum has sprung a leak, it's the only credible explanation. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Crab Posted March 3, 2019 Report Share Posted March 3, 2019 14 hours ago, scotty said: I'm not usually one to delve too deeply into the somewhat nepotistic "likes" system ratty, but you have to admit that in crab we have a rival for pen. He'll get the message sooner or later. Delve says it all. Get your fist out of your arse and get me my Sunday Roast you Roasting Bitch Dog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted March 3, 2019 Report Share Posted March 3, 2019 17 hours ago, Crab said: The bottom line. What little Eric sees when he looks at Wizz😛 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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