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Plump brides have that whiff of desperation about them as they rush to tie the knot before sliding further down the scale from “Karen Carpenter” towards “morbidly obese”, the sort of cunts who describe themselves as “voluptuous” or “Rubenesque” rather than the more accurate “hamster-cheeked” or “lard-arsed”. Sadly for them – and for their poor deluded husbands – their wedding day is the best they'll ever look.

c00d9864ee31703f6e96928ede2775d2--weddin

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11 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

Plump brides have that whiff of desperation about them as they rush to tie the knot before sliding further down the scale from “Karen Carpenter” towards “morbidly obese”, the sort of cunts who describe themselves as “voluptuous” or “Rubenesque” rather than the more accurate “hamster-cheeked” or “lard-arsed”. Sadly for them – and for their poor deluded husbands – their wedding day is the best they'll ever look.

c00d9864ee31703f6e96928ede2775d2--weddin

Haha is that actually her?

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1 minute ago, Decimus said:

Haha is that actually her?

Christ, no. I'm not getting banned again. (Although, technically, as she's not a member any more...)

The words are the original text, but Cuntwad's picture has been replaced by some generic munter that the Memebase crew have christened "Cake Bride".

 

 

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They all fucking end up that way

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16 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

Plump brides have that whiff of desperation about them as they rush to tie the knot before sliding further down the scale from “Karen Carpenter” towards “morbidly obese”, the sort of cunts who describe themselves as “voluptuous” or “Rubenesque” rather than the more accurate “hamster-cheeked” or “lard-arsed”. Sadly for them – and for their poor deluded husbands – their wedding day is the best they'll ever look.

c00d9864ee31703f6e96928ede2775d2--weddin

Fucking hell! Looks like he's digging a woman out of an avalanche with a spoon...

Did Cuntwad fit into this category?

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25 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

Plump brides have that whiff of desperation about them as they rush to tie the knot before sliding further down the scale from “Karen Carpenter” towards “morbidly obese”, the sort of cunts who describe themselves as “voluptuous” or “Rubenesque” rather than the more accurate “hamster-cheeked” or “lard-arsed”. Sadly for them – and for their poor deluded husbands – their wedding day is the best they'll ever look.

c00d9864ee31703f6e96928ede2775d2--weddin

Munchie Box!

The treat you can eat between meals, without ruining your appetite.

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Just now, Decimus said:

Size fucking seven feet? Is he Leo Sayer?

Height 5' 8", weight 140 pounds, according to that same profile. Sayer's fucking hair alone weighed more than that.

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1 hour ago, Roadkill said:

Fucking hell! Looks like he's digging a woman out of an avalanche with a spoon...

Did Cuntwad fit into this category?

She's not overweight, she's undertall. She simply needs to grow another 8' 3" to reach "normal" body mass index.

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You get blokes who are 'Feeders' - a genuine condition, which basically presents itself as an insecure bloke bagging a hottie and then, to ensure hottie never leaves (either to make her unattractive to other blokes or that she has a heart attack the moment she tries to make a bolt for it) they stuff them full of cake at every opportunity.

Without going into great detail, I have a relative who was a world champion athlete. First boyfriend couldn't stand the attention she was getting so, in direct contravention to the dietary regime her governing body developed for her and expected her to stick to, said bloke used to get her 'little treats', which he thought was endearing but was actually an exercise in 'gross (ha!) manipulation.

He had to go - and ended up marrying a heifer from Dewsbury

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1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

Plump brides have that whiff of desperation about them as they rush to tie the knot before sliding further down the scale from “Karen Carpenter” towards “morbidly obese”, the sort of cunts who describe themselves as “voluptuous” or “Rubenesque” rather than the more accurate “hamster-cheeked” or “lard-arsed”. Sadly for them – and for their poor deluded husbands – their wedding day is the best they'll ever look.

c00d9864ee31703f6e96928ede2775d2--weddin

This is the stuff of legend! Fuck me, the replacement Cuntwad looks like she must have her own local gravity. 

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8 minutes ago, Ape said:

This is the stuff of legend! Fuck me, the replacement Cuntwad looks like she must have her own local gravity. 

So that's you on the left is it @Ape?

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1 hour ago, Jiggerycock said:

He had to go - and ended up marrying a heifer from Dewsbury

Surely Dewhursts? 🤔

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4 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

Height 5' 8", weight 140 pounds, according to that same profile. Sayer's fucking hair alone weighed more than that.

 

3 hours ago, Ape said:

This is the stuff of legend! Fuck me, the replacement Cuntwad looks like she must have her own local gravity. 

She's got her own postcode 

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Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

'We're gonna need a bigger patio'

Larger moo-moo's,  an elevated toilet with a cement base reinforcement, a bidet with firehose power and double doors throughout the bedsit, as well.

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3 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Larger moo-moo's,  an elevated toilet with a cement base reinforcement, a bidet with firehose power and double doors throughout the bedsit, as well.

I'm worried about the lads from 2 Para. They've all been left with rucksacks full of string, because this cunt wanted a dress at short notice.

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4 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I'm worried about the lads from 2 Para. They've all been left with rucksacks full of string, because this cunt wanted a dress at short notice.

Three sizes larger to accommodate the numerous cakes and crisps to be ingested and still look "fit and trim." 

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2 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Three sizes larger to accommodate the numerous cakes and crisps to be ingested and still look "fit and trim." 

Her back is marked on ordnance survey maps as 'Thoracic Park'.

 

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1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Her back is marked on ordnance survey maps as 'Thoracic Park'.

 

With all the grease she consumes, are the spots also categorized as volcanic hot spots?  

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3 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

With all the grease she consumes, are the spots also categorized as volcanic hot spots?  

I imagine that pus, snot, and the crispy yellow stuff in the corners of her eyes, all count as nutrition in her world.

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25 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I imagine that pus, snot, and the crispy yellow stuff in the corners of her eyes, all count as nutrition in her world.

What about the crispy yellowish gunk in the corners of her flaps?  

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6 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

What about the crispy yellowish gunk in the corners of her flaps?  

That's just paint chips from the axle stands her hubby uses to hold her guts up while he's fucking her.

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1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

That's just paint chips from the axle stands her hubby uses to hold her guts up while he's fucking her.

Here I thought it was yellow corn flour that didn't get pressure washed out after her in it to find the wet spot.  

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