Guest DrCunt Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 (edited) 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I'm abstaining from alcohol at the moment and substituting it with milk shake instead. The trouble is i don't always like to finish my milk shake and end up throwing it over anyone who's walking past. It happened twice recently, I think it was the same person as well. What are the fucking chances of that eh? You're only doing this because your milkshake brings all the boys to the tard. Edited May 18, 2019 by DrCunt Credit to @Ape for a suggested improvement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 1 minute ago, DrCunt said: You're only doing this because your milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. In his case, it’s the tard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 Just now, Ape said: In his case, it’s the tard. Wish I'd thought of that. Fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 13 minutes ago, DrCunt said: Wish I'd thought of that. Fuck. There's always the edit function, Doc. 👍 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 2 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said: I'm abstaining from alcohol at the moment and substituting it with milk shake instead. The trouble is i don't always like to finish my milk shake and end up throwing it over anyone who's walking past. It happened twice recently, I think it was the same person as well. What are the fucking chances of that eh? Is it a five dollar shake? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted May 18, 2019 Report Share Posted May 18, 2019 2 hours ago, Ape said: Fuck off. In what way should Cunty Bigbolloks fuck off ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 13 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: Australia it is, then. How stereotypical. https://www.statista.com/statistics/896768/countries-fastest-average-mobile-internet-speeds/ Perth. I'm a fucking techno idiot, as you well know. But even I managed to work that shit out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 7 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: The Camberwell Beauty used to be frequently found on front lawns at daybreak. You spelt 'fucked' wrong. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 Just now, Eric Cuntman said: You spelt 'fucked' wrong. Its quiet on here tonight. Everyone been watch euroshifest song contest? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 5 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Its quiet on here tonight. Everyone been watch euroshifest song contest? Frank was performing. Couldn't discern which of the 200,000 featured shit stabbers he was though. My guess would be Dana International. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 Just now, camberwell gypsy said: Its quiet on here tonight. Everyone been watch euroshifest song contest? No. Not me. I been to Southend, walked the mile and a bit pier, got the little train back. Been disgusted by the tights wearing, simpering faggots that represent the English male nowadays. What the fuck happened to normal men. The only time I saw one was in the mirror at Chelmsford station bogs. theyve all been turned into poofs by food additives and whatnot. Genuinely.. I'm 47 now, but I didn't meet one other male who I couldn't have capably and confidently kicked the shit out of. I hope we never get invaded. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 19 minutes ago, DrCunt said: Frank was performing. Couldn't discern which of the 200,000 featured shit stabbers he was though. My guess would be Dana International. Watched a bit of it. Madonna was the party piece. Fucking dreadful. She had an eye patch so I thought she'd do a rendition of Friggin in the Riggin but instead did Like a prayer that was out of tune and some other crap song that I'd never heard of. The stage was full of people wearing night dresses, wearing pig gas masks. I think she's fucking flipped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted May 19, 2019 Author Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said: Perth. I'm a fucking techno idiot, as you well know. But even I managed to work that shit out. Can’t be. I asked The Judge where in the world I lived and he said it was all fantasist remoaner bullshit. As we know, answers can’t change even when the information does, so I’m sticking with this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 7 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said: Can’t be. I asked The Judge where in the world I lived and he said it was all fantasist remoaner bullshit. As we know, answers can’t change even when the information does, so I’m sticking with this. Well. In the world of the Judge, even the most trivial of everyday drudgery is a fantastical invention of imaginary, utopian whimsy. Personally, good luck to you. Spawny fucking get. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 5 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Is it a five dollar shake? No. But I wish it had been a chocolate milk shake. Tommy Robinson would have loved that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 10 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: Perth. I'm a fucking techno idiot, as you well know. But even I managed to work that shit out. No Sherlock, shit. On 18/05/2019 at 10:53, Cuntybaws said: My money's on Perth, or somewhere nearby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 4 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: No Sherlock, shit. I know that the Aspergers probably renders you unaware of this, but I haven't read, or memorised your every utterance for the last year or so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 9 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Watched a bit of it. Madonna was the party piece. Fucking dreadful. She had an eye patch so I thought she'd do a rendition of Friggin in the Riggin but instead did Like a prayer that was out of tune and some other crap song that I'd never heard of. The stage was full of people wearing night dresses, wearing pig gas masks. I think she's fucking flipped. I had it on mute in the background, and dipped in and out occasionally as a sort of sociological experiment. There were two or three moments where they actually appeared to run out of LGBTQIA freaks to parade, but just like PT Barnum they filled that vacuum with morbidly obese ham planets who attempted to do some ballet dancing, in defiance of Newton's law of gravity. Simply fucking awful, and it's swung me firmly into the "No Deal" Brexit camp. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 when I die, I'd like my ashes scattered on Billy Ocean. Emoji Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 2 minutes ago, ratcum said: when I die, I'd like my ashes scattered on Billy Ocean. Emoji - LOL Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket, Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it. Hieroglyphics? Let me be specific I wanna be down in your South Seas, But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory". So if I capsize on your thighs, high tide, B5, you sunk my battleship, Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip. So show me yours, I'll show you mine, "Tool Time" you'll love it just like Lyle, And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 21 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket, Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it. Hieroglyphics? Let me be specific I wanna be down in your South Seas, But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory". So if I capsize on your thighs, high tide, B5, you sunk my battleship, Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip. So show me yours, I'll show you mine, "Tool Time" you'll love it just like Lyle, And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files". This is brilliant. Chiefly because it proves that you're more fucked up than me. Not as much as that Rat cunt though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 14 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: This is brilliant. Chiefly because it proves that you're more fucked up than me. Not as much as that Rat cunt though. The Bloodhound Gang are underrated lyrical geniuses. One of my personal favourites is, “A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying”, which opens with the immortal line, "I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert that night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 15 hours ago, Ape said: Fuck off. APEPORN. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said: The Bloodhound Gang are underrated lyrical geniuses. One of my personal favourites is, “A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying”, which opens with the immortal line, "I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert that night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love." FFS 😄😄😄 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 5 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: Love, the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket, Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it. Hieroglyphics? Let me be specific I wanna be down in your South Seas, But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory". So if I capsize on your thighs, high tide, B5, you sunk my battleship, Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip. So show me yours, I'll show you mine, "Tool Time" you'll love it just like Lyle, And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files". you're fuckin mad. Tygers (sic) of Pantang: One, two, three, four, Euthanasia OKKill 'em off if you canThe gas is nice, but the needle's betterGrandma Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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