Guest judgetwi Posted June 28, 2019 Report Share Posted June 28, 2019 54 minutes ago, ratcum said: When anyone new was on the ranges, they'd inevitably asked nervously about the kick of the rifle. Being total cunts, we'd always say "hold it about an inch in front of your shoulder" Poor bastards must still be wandering about with their right arms hanging off. lol Short term thinking Herr Oberst. How are you going to do the “German Greeting” with a fucked up right arm? You need to conquer the mind not just the body. It’s this kind of lack of attention to detail that led to the disaster at Stalingrad. Fortunately Frau Merkel and her friends have pulled your mob out of the shit. Let’s face it, the Krauts have always been smarter than us. But we’ve got bottle......and that counts for a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: Tell them to shove their Christian jam up their prolapsed fucking shitpipes. Any slide blowback automatic, works on a suspended, non-gravitational dependent reciprocative carriage. You women are ruining the world with your oestrogen fuelled, misinformative, man hating bollocks. Us men are cultured, civilised and informed. And if any of you flabby chested, no-tail, fish-flapped cunts disagree, I will happily shoot you in the tits. You are Roops and I claim my 10000 piece jigsaw of Salisbury Cathedral Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 2 hours ago, ratcum said: Bizarrely, I only got a jam with a No.1 Mk.4 bolt action. With rimmed cartridges you had to load your charger 3 down and 2 up to avoid fuckery. Thankyou R Lee Ermey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 3 hours ago, ratcum said: The 'George Clooney' Catch 22 is as shit as the book and the other film. Other than the catch 22 situation (a couple of sentences), I don't know why people think it's clever. Can't speak to the new Clooney version, but the original film wasn't very good because the book just didn't translate well to film. But I thought the book was fucking great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 31 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: You are Roops and I claim my 10000 piece jigsaw of Salisbury Cathedral Clever cunt eh?.. Well, best you realise, My tolerance for insubordinate wenches, is neither documented, or even existent. I suggest you moderate your tone, lest you fall foul of my authorative side. Yeah! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 5 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Can't speak to the new Clooney version, but the original film wasn't very good because the book just didn't translate well to film. But I thought the book was fucking great. I read that cunt book. I quite liked it. But I agree. The film with that overplaudited Arkin cunt, was a bridge too far. Orson Welles makes me sick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 29 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said: I read that cunt book. I quite liked it. But I agree. The film with that overplaudited Arkin cunt, was a bridge too far. Orson Welles makes me sick. The original film might have done better at the box office if the original M*A*S*H with Donald Sutherland and Elliot Gould hadn't come out at almost the same time and blew it out of the water. And though Catch-22 was based on a far superior book to the one M*A*S*H was based on, trying to translate to film, a book that meandered back and forth between the past, present and future, and which stuck to no hard and fast timeline of events, was an overly ambitious undertaking to begin with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 10 hours ago, judgetwi said: Short term thinking Herr Oberst. How are you going to do the “German Greeting” with a fucked up right arm? You need to conquer the mind not just the body. It’s this kind of lack of attention to detail that led to the disaster at Stalingrad. Fortunately Frau Merkel and her friends have pulled your mob out of the shit. Let’s face it, the Krauts have always been smarter than us. But we’ve got bottle......and that counts for a lot. Stalingrad was down to the Bohemian Corporal not listening to his professional soldiers. However, their reluctance to push on and entirely control the west bank of the Volga proved fatal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 9 hours ago, Salty Piss Flap said: Can't speak to the new Clooney version, but the original film wasn't very good because the book just didn't translate well to film. But I thought the book was fucking great. It's all Judeo-Bolshevik claptrap anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 24 minutes ago, ratcum said: Stalingrad was down to the Bohemian Corporal not listening to his professional soldiers. However, their reluctance to push on and entirely control the west bank of the Volga proved fatal. The dopey cunts would have had difficulty controlling the west bank of the River Exe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 15 hours ago, Decimus said: Have you received any 'cunt's' from Withers today, or has the cancerous wanker "bankrupted" himself yet again by blowing them all on me? With his history of financial mismanagement, I wouldn't be surprised if he treats his limited allocation of 'iron's' and 'cunt's' with the same blasé attitude that he adopted during his Welsh wood chopping misadventures. I’ve had nothing so far. Hopefully it’s a sign that he’s dead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 15 minutes ago, Ape said: I’ve had nothing so far. Hopefully it’s a sign that he’s dead. Are you having a nice time with your imaginary family and imaginary friends this afternoon? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Earl Albert of Ross (Bt) Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 1 hour ago, Glowworm said: Are you having a nice time with your imaginary family and imaginary friends this afternoon? What about his imaginary helicopter? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Roops Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 4 minutes ago, Earl Albert of Ross said: What about his imaginary helicopter? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Earl Albert of Ross (Bt) Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 5 minutes ago, Mrs Roops said: I give up, what is it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Roops Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 1 minute ago, Earl Albert of Ross said: I give up, what is it? Its an example of why Ape is The Man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 19 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: Were these the sort of cunts who thought 'lean forward' was a type of bacon? I don't understand cunts that can't shoot. Perverts. Rimless rounds do actually have a rim, it's just that it's recessed. Win a pub bet with that one Authoritah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 52 minutes ago, ratcum said: Rimless rounds do actually have a rim, it's just that it's recessed. Win a pub bet with that one Authoritah Imagine mistaking parabellum for a para's bell-end... Larks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 6 hours ago, Mrs Roops said: Its an example of why Ape is The Man. I’d say it’s an example of someone that’s rattled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 6 minutes ago, Ape said: I’d say it’s an example of someone that’s rattled. I thought you might be a hermaphrodite... lol. Fuck off. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 1 hour ago, Ape said: I’d say it’s an example of someone that’s rattled. How are things with your imaginary family and friends? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: Imagine mistaking parabellum for a para's bell-end... Larks. That reminds me of one of my all-time favorite passages from a book I read many years ago. From The Odessa File, by Frederick Forsyth... Quote Years of living like a predatory animal and surviving where others, victims and colleagues, had ended on a pathologist‘s slab had given Mackensen the senses of a leopard. He didn‘t see the shadow that fell onto the carpet from the open French window; he felt it and spun around, ready to fire. But the man was unarmed. "Who the hell are you?“ growled Mackensen, keeping him covered. The man stood in the French window, dressed in the black leather leggings and jacket of a motorcyclist. In his left hand he carried his crash helmet, gripped by the short peak and held across his stomach. The man flicked a glance at the body at Mackensen‘s feet and the gun in his hand. "I was sent for,“ he said innocently. "Who by?“ said Mackensen. "Vulkan,“ replied the man. "My Kamerad, Roschmann.“ Mackensen grunted and lowered the gun. "Well, he‘s gone.“ "Gone?“ "Fucked off. Heading for South America. The whole project‘s off. And all thanks to this little bastard reporter.“ He jerked the gun barrel toward Miller. "You going to finish him?“ asked the man. "Sure. He screwed up the project. Identified Roschmann and mailed the information to the police, along with a pile of other stuff. If you‘re in that file, you‘d better get out too.“ "What file?“ "The Odessa file.“ "I‘m not in it,“ said the man. "Neither am I,“ growled Mackensen. "But the Werwolf is, and his orders are to finish this one off before we quit.“ "The Werwolf?“ Something began to sound a small alarm inside Mackensen. He had just been told that in Germany no one apart from the Werwolf and himself knew about the Vulkan project. The others were in South America, from where he assumed the new arrival had come. But such a man would know about the Werwolf. His eyes narrowed slightly. "You‘re from Buenos Aires?“ he asked. "No.“ "Where from, then?“ "Jerusalem.“ It took half a second before the meaning of the name made sense to Mackensen. Then he swung up his Luger to fire. Half a second is a long time, long enough to die. The foam rubber inside the crash helmet was scorched when the Walther went off. But the nine-millimeter parabellum slug came through the fiberglass without a pause and took Mackensen high in the breastbone with the force of a kicking mule. The helmet dropped to the ground to reveal the agent‘s right hand, and from inside the cloud of blue smoke the PPK fired again. Mackensen was a big man and a strong one. Despite the bullet in the chest he would have fired, but the second slug, entering his head two finger-widths above the right eyebrow, spoiled his aim. It also killed him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 3 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said: That reminds me of one of my all-time favorite passages from a book I read many years ago. From The Odessa File, by Frederick Forsyth... Now that there's some daggum' writin' right there, dadburn it!!! 😁 I still enjoy reading Mother West Wind's Animal Friends .. I really like Grandfather Frog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 I noticed, while browsing before logging in, that “it” had made another reference to my supposedly imaginary family and friends. I’m intrigued as to why it feels that having family and friends is unusual. Could it be that it is a sad, lonely, miserable old goat that has neither friends or family, or indeed genitalia? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Salty Piss Flap Posted June 29, 2019 Report Share Posted June 29, 2019 5 minutes ago, Glowworm said: I still enjoy reading Mother West Wind's Animal Friends .. I really like Grandfather Frog. Not familiar with that, but probably not really my "thing". 😉 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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