Jump to content
CUNTS CORNER TWITTER ACCOUNT ID @CuntsCorner ×
Donations towards site upkeep will be thankfully received and faithfully applied....

Soldiers wearing make up 💄


King Billy

Recommended Posts

8 minutes ago, Glowworm said:

I am fairly sure that I saw the curvature of the earth one night in 1973 when I came out of the Broughton Arms at Haslington .. I still can't remember what I had been drinking though.

Probably an optical-illusion - created by looking at the world over the shaft of the cock you were sucking.

‘Also , Rode Heath does have a slight ‘bend’ to it , after dark.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, Decimus said:

If you recall, Fender thought that he could see it at below sea-level, whilst on his hands and knees servicing his Canadian boyfriend.

I fucking do and like a cunt I actually think I tried to defend him (baws will know). 

A quick Roops style google reveals that it is possible to see the effect of the earths shape by watching a ship disappear over the horizon but so see the actual curvature, as proper was eluding to, you'd need to be over 35,000 feet. Sorry Bender you twat.

As for sucking off a canuck, I wouldn't like to comment (again, baws will no doubt know)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, Pete said:

Probably an optical-illusion - created by looking at the world over the shaft of the cock you were sucking.

‘Also , Rode Heath does have a slight ‘bend’ to it , after dark.

Good evening Albert .. Did you walk home via Holmshaw Lane or did you try to go viia Hassall Green and fall into Winterley Pool?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, Glowworm said:

Good evening Albert .. Did you walk home via Holmshaw Lane or did you try to go viia Hassall Green and fall into Winterley Pool?

I can see you bought one of those ‘Terrence Higgins Trust’ sat-navs.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Erroreptile404
26 minutes ago, Pete said:

I can see you bought one of those ‘Terrence Higgins Trust’ sat-navs.  

Glowworm is Ronnie Corbett when he was in those Wiltshire Farmfoods adverts. But with osteoporosis.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 minutes ago, Erroreptile404 said:

Glowworm is Ronnie Corbett when he was in those Wiltshire Farmfoods adverts. But with osteoporosis.

But then again - she always had quite a weak pelvis - ever since school.

I SAID PELVIS!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 08/10/2019 at 17:18, Stubby Pecker said:

Bang to rights.

I've had to block Pete as the only other option was tracking him down and stamping on his stupid fucking head until it went pop. However, I've given flappy the benefit of the doubt until now but his constant flow of drivel even puts the cross dressing ticket stamper (another one blissfully ignored) to shame.

Every man jack of us thinks along the same lines.

Stubbs, I informed him on another thread that I've triangulated his exact location, and if his volume of posts didn't decrease and the quality didn't improve. I'd break into his house, cover his front room in tarpaulin, draw for a fillet knife, and open him up like a fucking village fete.

I blocked Spunky Jock Strap about a week ago due to him being an unfunny yank parody, and a fucking idiot.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 minutes ago, Major Cunt said:

Stubbs, I informed him on another thread that I've triangulated his exact location, and if his volume of posts didn't decrease and the quality didn't improve. I'd break into his house, cover his front room in tarpaulin, draw for a fillet knife, and open him up like a fucking village fete.

I blocked Spunky Jock Strap about a week ago due to him being an unfunny yank parody, and a fucking idiot.

Was that before we started going out Major. I can’t remember , it’s been such a whirlwind romance , what with the flowers , chocolates and the likes and that.  Sadly the reality is that a dark shape would slit you from neck to knee before you even got out of your car.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

19 minutes ago, Pete said:

Was that before we started going out Major. I can’t remember , it’s been such a whirlwind romance , what with the flowers , chocolates and the likes and that.  Sadly the reality is that a dark shape would slit you from neck to knee before you even got out of your car.

Just coz I've chucked you a few likes, Pete, don't get it twisted as the kids say. Unlike my obese acquaintance Jewdy, you wouldn't see me coming. You could be cashing your giro in some shithole Post Office in Wigan, and before you register it's a hit on your life rather than an armed blag, I've appeared then discharged a sawn-off into your head.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 06/10/2019 at 00:10, King Billy said:

Frank. Do you remember when you were somebody?

Frank can't even remember that his old man and Ming are dead.

Every night he sits in his Wickes kitchen, screaming at a bright yellow Pikachu doll to make him a batch of dim sum whilst simultaneously begging the most hideously deformed potato in his cupboard for pocket money.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Trumpton  Bacon
10 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Frank can't even remember that his old man and Ming are dead.

Every night he sits in his Wickes kitchen, screaming at a bright yellow Pikachu doll to make him a batch of dim Sum whilst simultaneously begging the most hideously deformed potato in his cupboard for pocket money.

That's by far the funniest diatribe I've seen this year. The irony though, lies in it's undoubted accuracy.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest judgetwi
22 minutes ago, Frank said:

Ed’s still a little starstruck if not shell-shocked after our brief encounter at my local. You might have noticed he’s been avoiding me of late. 

Any cunt would avoid you Frank. They don’t want to be involved in that business in Portugal. That’s dodgy stuff.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Salty Piss Flap
7 hours ago, Trumpton Bacon said:

That's by far the funniest diatribe I've seen this year. The irony though, lies in it's undoubted accuracy.

You shouldn't have said that to @Decimus.

Now he's going to spend the rest of the evening in front of the mirror singing Wind Beneath My Wings to his reflection.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Trumpton  Bacon
15 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

You shouldn't have said that to @Decimus.

Now he's going to spend the rest of the evening in front of the mirror singing Wind Beneath My Wings to his reflection.

Indeed, no doubt whilst wearing his little used County Council standard issue hi-viz PVC water resistant trousers, whilst cranking his handle, left handed, with his one remaining Marigold Dayglo orange washing up glove. 

But, that's Decimus for you.

Anyway, never mind all that shit, Iranian women are now allowed to watch football (not the American Lycra and helmet gayfest variant) in stadiums. What do you think about that? 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Frank said:

Ed’s still a little starstruck if not shell-shocked after our brief encounter at my local. You might have noticed he’s been avoiding me of late. 

It’s true, I was surprised to say the least, however I strongly suspect your bulk is down to steroid abuse, I truly believe you couldn’t fight your way out of a wet paper bag....

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Wizardsleeve
On 10/10/2019 at 16:00, Frank said:

Pen, all these cunts! I’m getting it in the ear, left right and centre. Who do I turn to? Shit. 

That bottle of Domestos in the janitor's closet!  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Wizardsleeve
1 minute ago, Roadkill said:

Divin't even think about it!

Fancy stuff Domestos. Shame to waste it.

I'm clinging to the hope that the posh nature of Domestos will convince the tight fisted AIDS ravaged cocksucker to invite Pen and Roops for a private, intimate gathering of drinks and gloomy memory creation before they down from their own internal bleeding.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...