camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 Just looking at the traffic reports and there's 15 mile jams on the M6 heading for Blackpool and 20 mile tailbacks on the M5 to name just two. Now I'm just trying to work out why the fuck would you think "Going to be a scorcher tomorrow. Let's drive down to (insert coastal shithole) for the day. How about it kids"? Four hours later the cunt and his family are trapped in their metal box, sweating like Vannessa Feltz on a treadmill, kids moaning "How long to go daddy" and "I need to go pee pee mummy", cursing and calling all the other cunts that are stuck, "stupid cunts" because it didn't enter our cunts mind that thousands of other cunts thought exactly the same stupid fucking thing. And when our hero arrives he joins the 3500+ other knights of the road, searching for a parking space because the 300 space car park filled up at 9am by 300+ "up and at 'em" smug bastards who are now slowly frying on the beach. Same goes for fucking idiots who go to theme parks on bank holidays and wonder why there's a 2 hour queues for all the decent rides. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Cunt Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 2 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Just looking at the traffic reports and there's 15 mile jams on the M6 heading for Blackpool and 20 mile tailbacks on the M5 to name just two. Now I'm just trying to work out why the fuck would you think "Going to be a scorcher tomorrow. Let's drive down to (insert coastal shithole) for the day. How about it kids"? Four hours later the cunt and his family are trapped in their metal box, sweating like Vannessa Feltz on a treadmill, kids moaning "How long to go daddy" and "I need to go pee pee mummy", cursing and calling all the other cunts that are stuck, "stupid cunts" because it didn't enter our cunts mind that thousands of other cunts thought exactly the same stupid fucking thing. And when our hero arrives he joins the 3500+ other knights of the road, searching for a parking space because the 300 space car park filled up at 9am by 300+ "up and at 'em" smug bastards who are now slowly frying on the beach. Same goes for fucking idiots who go to theme parks on bank holidays and wonder why there's a 2 hour queues for all the decent rides. Such predictable pleb mentality is quite the blessing when it comes to planning trips. We are hoping to spend a few days in Chelsea, which is rather deserted at the moment. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 2 hours ago, White Cunt said: Such predictable pleb mentality is quite the blessing when it comes to planning trips. We are hoping to spend a few days in Chelsea, which is rather deserted at the moment. Chelsea should be nuked from orbit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Weary&Disgusted Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Chelsea should be nuked from orbit. What makes you say that ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 29 minutes ago, Weary&Disgusted said: What makes you say that ? My mouth and larynx 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Weary&Disgusted Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said: My mouth and larynx But what crime has Chelsea committed to warrant thermonuclear death from above ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 6 minutes ago, Weary&Disgusted said: But what crime has Chelsea committed to warrant thermonuclear death from above ? Have you ever seen Made in Chelsea? Nuff said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 5 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Just looking at the traffic reports and there's 15 mile jams on the M6 heading for Blackpool and 20 mile tailbacks on the M5 to name just two. Now I'm just trying to work out why the fuck would you think "Going to be a scorcher tomorrow. Let's drive down to (insert coastal shithole) for the day. How about it kids"? Four hours later the cunt and his family are trapped in their metal box, sweating like Vannessa Feltz on a treadmill, kids moaning "How long to go daddy" and "I need to go pee pee mummy", cursing and calling all the other cunts that are stuck, "stupid cunts" because it didn't enter our cunts mind that thousands of other cunts thought exactly the same stupid fucking thing. And when our hero arrives he joins the 3500+ other knights of the road, searching for a parking space because the 300 space car park filled up at 9am by 300+ "up and at 'em" smug bastards who are now slowly frying on the beach. Same goes for fucking idiots who go to theme parks on bank holidays and wonder why there's a 2 hour queues for all the decent rides. Its been cloudy and fucking breezy in Torquay today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 Just now, Dawn Chorus said: Its been cloudy and fucking breezy in Torquay today. I imagine your prolapsed anus ended up this way decades ago, Pen. If ever I visit Torquay, I'll be keeping a watchful eye for a Jackie Stallone-lookalike who's just stolen a battered saveloy from a chip shop. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 8 minutes ago, Dawn Chorus said: Its been cloudy and fucking breezy in Torquay today. I was hoping for a tsunami. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 18 minutes ago, Weary&Disgusted said: But what crime has Chelsea committed to warrant thermonuclear death from above ? Jose Mourhinio Thick, talking in riddles, Portuguese cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 11 minutes ago, Dawn Chorus said: Its been cloudy and fucking breezy in Torquay today. I'm going down there in a couple of weeks (chinky plague permitting) for a scuba diving stint. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 2 minutes ago, King Billy said: Jose Mourhinio Thick, talking in riddles, Portuguese cunt. When he was at chelsea "fucking dago gobshite, cunt, arrogant wanker". Now he's at spurs "top man, messiah, the greatest"* *my brother who's a spurs fan and a bit of a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 4 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: When he was at chelsea "fucking dago gobshite, cunt, arrogant wanker". Now he's at spurs "top man, messiah, the greatest"* *my brother who's a spurs fan and a bit of a cunt. ‘Special One’ (Your brother, not Jose). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildeHarold Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 6 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Just looking at the traffic reports and there's 15 mile jams on the M6 heading for Blackpool and 20 mile tailbacks on the M5 to name just two. Now I'm just trying to work out why the fuck would you think "Going to be a scorcher tomorrow. Let's drive down to (insert coastal shithole) for the day. How about it kids"? Four hours later the cunt and his family are trapped in their metal box, sweating like Vannessa Feltz on a treadmill, kids moaning "How long to go daddy" and "I need to go pee pee mummy", cursing and calling all the other cunts that are stuck, "stupid cunts" because it didn't enter our cunts mind that thousands of other cunts thought exactly the same stupid fucking thing. And when our hero arrives he joins the 3500+ other knights of the road, searching for a parking space because the 300 space car park filled up at 9am by 300+ "up and at 'em" smug bastards who are now slowly frying on the beach. Same goes for fucking idiots who go to theme parks on bank holidays and wonder why there's a 2 hour queues for all the decent rides. Wow the keyboard warrior is overheating. Calm down, calm down, it's only a one day event..."Dear" (Michael Winner I miss you!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 33 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said: Wow the keyboard warrior is overheating. Calm down, calm down, it's only a one day event..."Dear" (Michael Winner I miss you!) When people start retaliating again, are you going to start crying about being picked on? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 4 hours ago, White Cunt said: Such predictable pleb mentality is quite the blessing when it comes to planning trips. We are hoping to spend a few days in Chelsea, which is rather deserted at the moment. You obviously won’t fit in when you arrive but you will gradually gravitate towards the less fashionable places... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 1 hour ago, Wolfie said: I imagine your prolapsed anus ended up this way decades ago, Pen. If ever I visit Torquay, I'll be keeping a watchful eye for a Jackie Stallone-lookalike who's just stolen a battered saveloy from a chip shop. Idiot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 1 hour ago, Wolfie said: I imagine your prolapsed anus ended up this way decades ago, Pen. If ever I visit Torquay, I'll be keeping a watchful eye for a Jackie Stallone-lookalike who's just stolen a battered saveloy from a chip shop. I’m sure your anus has been surgically knitted into face based on your recent contributions.... lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 58 minutes ago, Frank said: Idiot. I know there's some red-blooded male inside you, Frank. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted July 31, 2020 Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 9 minutes ago, Wolfie said: I know there's some red-blooded male inside you, Frank. God knows who he is though. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 2 hours ago, King Billy said: ‘Special One’ (Your brother, not Jose). He is a bit 'special'. He loves going on the sunshine bus outings to the coast, but he keeps nicking the hats from outside the bucket and spade shops. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 31, 2020 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2020 25 minutes ago, Wolfie said: I know there's some red-blooded male inside you, Frank. I should imagine theres been a few inside him over the years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted August 1, 2020 Report Share Posted August 1, 2020 5 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: I'm going down there in a couple of weeks (chinky plague permitting) for a scuba diving stint. Presumably a mask will be part of the normal outfit, you wouldn't want to scare the fish. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted August 1, 2020 Report Share Posted August 1, 2020 9 hours ago, Weary&Disgusted said: What makes you say that ? Roman fucking Abramovic Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.