300cc Scooters.......... with 2 dashcams..

[Guest DingTheRioja]

There's a cunt I see around a lot with one of those Honda 300cc scooters, he's a Security Guard (capitalisation required, he's one of those security guards..), the scooter is all in white, he's added a black and white checker sticker down the side to look like a coppers bike.  He's got a dashcam on the front windshield thing, he's also got one on his helmet (also white with black checkers).  He wears a hi-viz tabbard over his gear pre-printed with something like "recording cameras onboard" all over the fucking thing.

This is the cunt that skips over mini-roundabouts in front of ambulances with the blues and twos running, the cunt who undertakes white vans using the red cycle lane, the cunt who undertakes buses at the bus-stop, the cunt who I have seen crossing the road using a pedestrian island on his fucking scooter!

I hope the bastard gets mullahed one day, and the cops use his dashcam against him. 

"Cause of Death : Stupid Cunt - case closed"

[Bubba C]

I sincerely hope that you have brain-damage.

This would go some way to explaining the absolute shit that pours forth from your sloppy brain to your clammy fingers and makes its way onto this site. 

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

Other than being Boring as fuck your post has raised a couple of questions.

1) are you sure it's definitely a Honda

2) is it exactly 300cc

3) is it only ambulances he cuts in front of

4) is it just white vans he undertakes or will any colour suffice

5) does he only favour the red cycle lanes.

I honestly believe that if you clarify these issues than you may grab other posters attention and not labelled such a boring cunt

[Guest Manky]

Ding is correct in one respect. Speaking as a former shopping mall security guard of 3 months experience, the industry is full of titbags who think that in life's pecking order they are a vital link between MI5 and the SAS. Then they shit it when faced with an OAP with dementia who forgot to pay for their Sanatogen.

[Bubba C]

19 minutes ago, Manky said:

Ding is correct in one respect. Speaking as a former shopping mall security guard of 3 months experience, the industry is full of titbags who think that in life's pecking order they are a vital link between MI5 and the SAS. Then they shit it when faced with an OAP with dementia who forgot to pay for their Sanatogen.

Could be something to do with the training they receive oop North, Manky.......

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-36041316

[scotty]

3 minutes ago, Bubbles said:

Could be something to do with the training they receive oop North, Manky.......

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-36041316

That's astounding, bubbles. Dogs finding sausages, which they could eat, instead of heroin, which their furry little paws might have difficulty injecting? Mind you, in mancland they're probably trained to do that.

[Bubba C]

5 minutes ago, scotty said:

That's astounding, bubbles. Dogs finding sausages, which they could eat, instead of heroin, which their furry little paws might have difficulty injecting? Mind you, in mancland they're probably trained to do that.

Exactly, Scot.

Why not train them to get on the beak or another easily snorted substance?  Amateurs. 

[Guest Manky]

Scotty and Bubbles. The new comedy double act. The sooner you two end up in the same state, I.e fucking dead, as the 2 Ronnie's, the better for all of us.

Up here, drugs take away the pleasure of life in the great city. In Wales it is a chore getting out of bed without kalf a K of Columbian marching powder.

Fuck off, the pair of you.

[Guest Fatty]

5 minutes ago, Manky said:

Scotty and Bubbles. The new comedy double act. The sooner you two end up in the same state, I.e fucking dead, as the 2 Ronnie's, the better for all of us.

Up here, drugs take away the pleasure of life in the great city. In Wales it is a chore getting out of bed without kalf a K of Columbian marching powder.

Fuck off, the pair of you.

Manky, that is worthy of a fucking award you odious cunt, I congratulate you on your excellent use of words, keep it up you soppy cunt

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

4 hours ago, DingTheRioja said:

There's a cunt I see around a lot with one of those Honda 300cc scooters, he's a Security Guard (capitalisation required, he's one of those security guards..), the scooter is all in white, he's added a black and white checker sticker down the side to look like a coppers bike.  He's got a dashcam on the front windshield thing, he's also got one on his helmet (also white with black checkers).  He wears a hi-viz tabbard over his gear pre-printed with something like "recording cameras onboard" all over the fucking thing.

This is the cunt that skips over mini-roundabouts in front of ambulances with the blues and twos running, the cunt who undertakes white vans using the red cycle lane, the cunt who undertakes buses at the bus-stop, the cunt who I have seen crossing the road using a pedestrian island on his fucking scooter!

I hope the bastard gets mullahed one day, and the cops use his dashcam against him. 

"Cause of Death : Stupid Cunt - case closed"

Sounds like bollocks some cunt made up for want of any other funny shit.

[Bubba C]

8 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

Sounds like bollocks some cunt made up for want of any other funny shit.

Your usual M.O if I'm not mistaken, Quincy?

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

1 minute ago, Bubbles said:

Your usual M.O if I'm not mistaken, Quincy?

Ouch.

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

3 minutes ago, Bubbles said:

Your usual M.O if I'm not mistaken, Quincy?

You seem to be being nonced next door on "elvis".

[Bubba C]

6 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

You seem to be being nonced next door on "elvis".

Yeah, he's a fucking thick cunt isn't he?

Fingers crossed for his heart-attack/ donut-choking death soon. 

[Guest Bill Stickers]

"Ding's first nom for a decade universally panned by critics" reads the headline of this evening's Cunt Enquirer.

"Ding's comeback tour, already marred with wild accusations of grassing, autism, and noncing, has taken yet another downward turn", declared the author. 

"Friends and foes alike are seeking to distance themselves from the troubled poster after another poorly timed and terribly constructed piece of creative output."

The article continued by saying, "Some are suggesting this is the end of the line for Ding, and that the only way forward is suicide."

"However, Mumsnet are rumoured to be willing to step in and help, feeling he would be a perfect fit for their drab and dreary message board full of fucking cretins."

 

[Guest Quincy Cockfingers]

1 hour ago, Bubbles said:

Yeah, he's a fucking thick cunt isn't he?

Fingers crossed for his heart-attack/ donut-choking death soon. 

Bubbles, whats all this shit from Fatty here.......

[scotty]

2 hours ago, Manky said:

Scotty and Bubbles. The new comedy double act. The sooner you two end up in the same state, I.e fucking dead, as the 2 Ronnie's, the better for all of us.

Up here, drugs take away the pleasure of life in the great city. In Wales it is a chore getting out of bed without kalf a K of Columbian marching powder.

Fuck off, the pair of you.

Feel free to join in, manky.  I reckon two or three more of us and roops could have her monthly orgasm over her regular fantasies about a corner circle jerk.

[Decimus]

Ding, even left in the hands of a master cunter, it would have been nigh on impossible to turn this subject matter into a truly entertaining thread.

Left in the hands of a grey y-front and beige tank top wearing fucking bore like yourself, the outcome was always going to be a couple of paragraphs of tedious fucking drivel.

Your effort really is a steaming pile of complete  and utter fucking shit.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

Whilst I feel future generations will regard fatty as an Assange type figure, I fear for his immediate survival. 

[Bubba C]

2 hours ago, Manky said:

Scotty and Bubbles. The new comedy double act. The sooner you two end up in the same state, I.e fucking dead, as the 2 Ronnie's, the better for all of us.

Up here, drugs take away the pleasure of life in the great city. In Wales it is a chore getting out of bed without kalf a K of Columbian marching powder.

Fuck off, the pair of you.

Manky, a person of my sunny disposition was only placed on this planet in order to balance the morose tedium you bring to it. 

As you'll no doubt be dead soon, I'm sure there will be another miserable, racist northerner taking your place. 

Fingers crossed it will have opposable thumbs and be more evolved than you, I don't think the world can handle another boring cycle-ninja cunt. 

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

3 hours ago, Decimus said:

Ding, even left in the hands of a master cunter, it would have been nigh on impossible to turn this subject into a truly entertaining thread.

Left in the hands of a grey y-front and beige tank top wearing fucking bore like yourself, the outcome was always going to be a couple of paragraphs of tedious fucking drivel.

Your effort really is a steaming pile of complete  and utter fucking shit.

Well, you could always try contributing to try and resurrect the subject of the nom. into a more entertaining piece rather than being abisive to other posters. That is frankly becoming quite boring.

[Bubba C]

3 hours ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

Bubbles, whats all this shit from Fatty here.......

Quincy, I wish I had the time and inclination to point out the similarities between Fatty and Eddie's retarded posts, prose, attack points, etc., but I'm sure many cunts of far superior IQ have done so in the past. 

Loathe as I am to suggest that the intellectual-heavyweight Eddie and the obese-heavyweight cunt Fatty are one and the same stupid prick, the fact that I've cunted Eddie far too easily lately and left him wandering about in a dazed state with his piss-soaked pants round his ankles and tears in his eyes, only for his knight in greasy armour Fatty to try and come to his rescue by using the same shit insults and goading me with accusations of noncery, and mutual like-swapping are a tad too convenient. 

Now, if Admin wants to pull his hat out of his arse and give everyone some more info about the whole sordid affair, that'd be great.  

[Decimus]

2 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Well, you could always try contributing to try and resurrect the subject of the nom.

You can't polish a turd like you can your bulbous slap head, Drew.

Now fuck off.

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

You must have seen these pious cunts on the road with cams to record all the other cunts on the road and they drive like fucking tossers themselves. Taxi drivers are a prime example but most of them are cunts anyhow.

[Guest DingTheRioja]

4 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

"Ding's first nom for a decade universally panned by critics" reads the headline of this evening's Cunt Enquirer.

"Ding's comeback tour, already marred with wild accusations of grassing, autism, and noncing, has taken yet another downward turn", declared the author. 

"Friends and foes alike are seeking to distance themselves from the troubled poster after another poorly timed and terribly constructed piece of creative output."

The article continued by saying, "Some are suggesting this is the end of the line for Ding, and that the only way forward is suicide."

"However, Mumsnet are rumoured to be willing to step in and help, feeling he would be a perfect fit for their drab and dreary message board full of fucking cretins."

 

The usual original bollocks I see.

2/10

 

4 hours ago, Decimus said:

Ding, even left in the hands of a master cunter, it would have been nigh on impossible to turn this subject matter into a truly entertaining thread.

Left in the hands of a grey y-front and beige tank top wearing fucking bore like yourself, the outcome was always going to be a couple of paragraphs of tedious fucking drivel.

Your effort really is a steaming pile of complete  and utter fucking shit.

See comment above.

1/10

 

55 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Well, you could always try contributing to try and resurrect the subject of the nom. into a more entertaining piece rather than being abisive to other posters. That is frankly becoming quite boring.

It's all he knows, even when he starts a nom, he's usually trying in vain to cunt me off.

43 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

You must have seen these pious cunts on the road with cams to record all the other cunts on the road and they drive like fucking tossers themselves. Taxi drivers are a prime example but most of them are cunts anyhow.

I thought taxi drivers only have them for the upskirt/pornhub opportunities?