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Kwik Fit Tyre centres


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On 19 May 2016 at 8:57 AM, Drew P Pissflaps said:

What the fuck do you know about cars? You're a girl aren't you?

Now you would get the sack for such a sexist statement like that when your superiors at the Solihull production line hear about that.....so that's everyone form catering and cleaners upwards then.

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On 19 May 2016 at 0:44 PM, Punkape said:

What a load of boring bollocks.

Why don't you join ISIS ?

Ahhh Punk.....did nanny read you my nom at bedtime?  Did it make you go bowbies?   Now leave the adults to nom you inbred cunt, there's a good little twat.  Why mention ISIS? that's about as topical as xmas in May you fucking behind the times cunt.   Fucking dull as ever.    Heres one for you....wish you had bought a holiday in Egypt and your luggage is currently floating somewhere off Malta.   Will be about November before nanny reads you that story for you to get it.  Cunt.

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On 19 May 2016 at 3:19 PM, Cuntybaws said:

If you don't use them? Just what in the actual fuck would someone use a large empty Toblerone tube for?

Contraception .

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On 19 May 2016 at 8:16 PM, deebom said:

You are a stupid cunt for going to Kwik Fit and deserve everything you get for going to the useless, wallet raping, lying twats.

I'm surprised they didn't tell you your brakes were fucked, and your exhaust was blowing.

They did but the order time was three weeks!

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Guest DingTheRioja
18 minutes ago, Monumental cunt said:

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

motor cars

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah .

Who the FUCK says "motor cars"...???

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3 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Who the FUCK says "motor cars"...???

I'm glad it's wound you up so much.  Top cunting indeed. I'm off to take a cookie from the jar.

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Guest DingTheRioja
Just now, Monumental cunt said:

I'm glad it's wound you up so much.  Top cunting indeed. I'm off to take a cookie from the jar.

Didn't wind me up, just surprised there's someone more fucked in the head that Luke.

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Guest nobgobbler
On 20/05/2016 at 8:39 AM, DingTheRioja said:

Has to be a hybrid... imagine trying to sort out the fuel/air mixture on that bastard up there!

With exceptional climate control, since the driver's not wearing a helmet.

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Guest nobgobbler
On 19/05/2016 at 11:04 AM, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Lewis Hamilton drives F1 cars but i wouldn't trust him to fill my washer bottle on my car.

Me neither. He has his car serviced by a bunch of cunts who can get your tyres off faster than gyppo' cousins. Fitting new ones and ready to go in two seconds flat just doesn't feel safe does it. No wonder he wears a helmet.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest DingTheRioja
1 hour ago, Brucey said:

MC, I've been a member of this site for less than a week, and I've spent half of that time trying to translate your indecipherable monologues from Rambling Spastic Cunt to English.

If you can't keep it concise, at least use a comma every now and again. Read it back out loud and asphyxiate yourself trying to get through it, you stupid fucking cunt.

Bollocks, you mean "less than a week with this account".

Fuck off Dics.

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Guest Bill Stickers
29 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Bollocks, you mean "less than a week with this account".

Fuck off Dics.

Do you want me to send you your shiny medal saying "Junior Detective" via post or present it in person? You thick, obtuse, autistic fucking idiot. Your endless need to spell out every little thing literally is as mind boggling as it is irritating. 

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Guest Bill Stickers
Just now, Bubbles said:

Shut up, ding. Idiot. 

Bubbles, these new cunts, you know the ones I'm talking about. Mostly avatar-less, illiterate, rambling idiots who think throwing the word cunt in as a verb, adjective, adverb and noun is amusing. Do you think they add anything to the site? Other than the overwhelming stench of desperation, acne and knob cheese? 

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2 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

Bubbles, these new cunts, you know the ones I'm talking about. Mostly avatar-less, illiterate, rambling idiots who think throwing the word cunt in as a verb, adjective, adverb and noun is amusing. Do you think they add anything to the site? Other than the overwhelming stench of desperation, acne and knob cheese? 

At first I thought they may be entertaining, but oddly, I was wrong, they are simply a bunch of spasticated idiots. 

Mere classless cretins on the lowest rung in the race for life.  

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Guest DingTheRioja
19 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

Do you want me to send you your shiny medal saying "Junior Detective" via post or present it in person? You thick, obtuse, autistic fucking idiot. Your endless need to spell out every little thing literally is as mind boggling as it is irritating. 

Irritating enough to make you fuck off?

17 minutes ago, Bubbles said:

Shut up, ding. Idiot. 

No.

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  • 2 years later...
On 5/19/2016 at 4:58 AM, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Range rovers use aluminium body panels and therefore don't rust. Shit nom. by the way which ultimately demonstrates what a moron you are as most sensible people would pre book an appointment for a slow puncture which would then give the garage an opportunity to check stock was available. 2/10 for lack of effort. Typical BMW driver, can't see beyond the bonnet of the car.

Iam now a driver of an Audi RS5 so iam not. Typical BMW cunt anymore.

 

iam much worse 

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On 5/19/2016 at 1:17 AM, Monumental cunt said:

So the fucking clue is in the name although it is a jolly jape and play on the word "quick" or have they chosen to call themselves "kwik" so as to avoid trade descriptions?   Took my black mans wheel 3 series to KF as had a slow puncture that became a flat.  Not a rare car by any stretch of the imagination, not like it's a Fraiser Nash or a Lamborghini Muira Sv right hand drive with gold wheels and sunburst red body  Fucking chimp tells me my tyre not in stock and it will be 2 days to get one in!!! Now bmw  in their fucking nazi Germany wisdom do not provide a spare wheel anymore, they have a pump and some gel to seal a puncture.....but the tyre is off the rim.  Fucking useless.    So chimp says do you want a taxi...and I say no I want a fucking tyre !  And Kwik...like the fucking shop name says !!!  Two other monkeys step into the shop cabin and get all giddy.....I remind them of the master servant relationship....and they remind me they have no fucking tyres in a fucking tyre shop.......I call them cunts.  One of the chimps takes umbrage at being cunted and tries to make a move but meets with my fucking raging annoyance.  I hobble round the corner to Abduls Tyres they have lots of my tyres in stock.   Don't believe that fucking wank advert on the telly.....KW are fucking useless mongs and a right set of jumpy cunts who all need a fucking car jack to fail and drop a 2 tonne rusty Range Rover on their heads.  Proper useless cunts and not a GCSE amongst them.

2 days is bollocks. There's a shifty looking cunt who runs a tyre shop from a corner shop front round the corner from me. If he don't have the tyre you need, he gets on the phone and will have it in in the afternoon or following morning. And he's a damn sight fucking cheaper than the KFC (Kwik Fit Cunts). And before anyone says, he's not a pikey. 

 

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2 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

2 days is bollocks. There's a shifty looking cunt who runs a tyre shop from a corner shop front round the corner from me. If he don't have the tyre you need, he gets on the phone and will have it in in the afternoon or following morning. And he's a damn sight fucking cheaper than the KFC (Qwick Fit Cunts). And before anyone says, he's not a pikey. 

 

Scouser?

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Guest Wizardsleeve
5 hours ago, Panzerknacker said:

Know what ya mean MC baby..I drive an 18 year old Citroën despatch van and trying to get tyres for it is a nightmare 

Panzerknacker 

I'm sure getting proper tyres isn't a problem.  If you would just remove the intravenous Anesthetic drip line, wrist and ankle restraints, and dildo gags throat gags, I'm sure you'd receive the same level of service as any other promise to pay cunt.  

Fuck off.

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