Big watches

[southerncunt]

Following on from Wolfie's nom about cunt real estate agents, anyone who feels the need to advertise the maxim that money can't buy taste by wearing any watch bigger than 42mm across is similarly a cunt. Cunts getting around with fucking clocks on their wrists shit me to tears. Wake up to yourselves, for fucks sake.

[Roadkill]

6 minutes ago, southerncunt said:

Following on from Wolfie's nom about cunt real estate agents, anyone who feels the need to advertise the maxim that money can't buy taste by wearing any watch bigger than 42mm across is similarly a cunt. Cunts getting around with fucking clocks on their wrists shit me to tears. Wake up to yourselves, for fucks sake.

Unless it's the sexiest watch known to mankind. The Casio Databank:

In gold, of course. To be classy.

[Eric Cuntman]

46 minutes ago, southerncunt said:

Following on from Wolfie's nom about cunt real estate agents, anyone who feels the need to advertise the maxim that money can't buy taste by wearing any watch bigger than 42mm across is similarly a cunt. Cunts getting around with fucking clocks on their wrists shit me to tears. Wake up to yourselves, for fucks sake.

You should see the watch worn by snooker player Marco Fu, size of a fag packet, fuck knows how he can play snooker wearing it, the reflection of the overhead lighting off the glass face must be dazzling.

[Guest Spanky]

2 hours ago, Roadkill said:

Unless it's the sexiest watch known to mankind. The Casio Databank:

In gold, of course. To be classy.

You trendy fucking cunt!

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

3 hours ago, Roadkill said:

Unless it's the sexiest watch known to mankind. The Casio Databank:

In gold, of course. To be classy.

Fuck off. That photos 17 years, 24 days, 21 hours and 42 minutes old. 

[camberwell gypsy]

19 hours ago, Roadkill said:

Unless it's the sexiest watch known to mankind. The Casio Databank:

In gold, of course. To be classy.

That looks like the gizmo I had to wear on my ankle for a few months. 

[Roadkill]

31 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

That looks like the gizmo I had to wear on my ankle for a few months. 

They do them in gold? Must be a ladies option. All of mine have been grey plastic, but it makes it easier to cut them off and throw in the ocean. Makes it a bit awkward when your parole officer rings up to ask why you're in the middle of the North Sea at four o'clock in the morning, though.

[Eric Cuntman]

8 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

They do them in gold? Must be a ladies option. All of mine have been grey plastic, but it makes it easier to cut them off and throw in the ocean. Makes it a bit awkward when your parole officer rings up to ask why you're in the middle of the North Sea at four o'clock in the morning, though.

The original ones had 2 wires running through the ankle strap, people used to expose the wires, bridge across with a couple of bits of speaker wire and cut the original, then slip it off, leave it next to the monitor box and fuck off out thieving again.

[Roadkill]

Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

The original ones had 2 wires running through the ankle strap, people used to expose the wires, bridge across with a couple of bits of speaker wire and cut the original, then slip it off, leave it next to the monitor box and fuck off out thieving again.

Speaking from experience eh, Eric?

[Eric Cuntman]

Just now, Roadkill said:

Speaking from experience eh, Eric?

No, but I did have some friends who were serious thieves and I came up with an idea for their getaway cars, police pursuit drivers are shit hot and the average criminal doesn't have a hope of getting away, unless they've got 3 paparazzi style flash guns mounted facing backwards on the rear parcel shelf, triggered by a switch in the front as soon as the police car is up your arse, the police need a good 2 minutes before they can see properly again. And that was my idea, and I'm very proud of it!

[PANZER MURPHY]

Decorative pillows on back parcel shelf filled with sand make a useful Bullet stopper and shooting platform and boot lined with telephone directories as additional armour. .light and unnoticeable 

Panzerknacker 

[camberwell gypsy]

2 hours ago, Roadkill said:

They do them in gold? Must be a ladies option. All of mine have been grey plastic, but it makes it easier to cut them off and throw in the ocean. Makes it a bit awkward when your parole officer rings up to ask why you're in the middle of the North Sea at four o'clock in the morning, though.

Sleepwalking

[Wolfie]

22 hours ago, southerncunt said:

Following on from Wolfie's nom about cunt real estate agents, anyone who feels the need to advertise the maxim that money can't buy taste by wearing any watch bigger than 42mm across is similarly a cunt. Cunts getting around with fucking clocks on their wrists shit me to tears. Wake up to yourselves, for fucks sake.

There are few things in life which say 'I'm a colossal cunt' more than someone purposefully ensuring the world knows they wear a Swiss-made, £1,000+ timepiece. Cue this nouveau-riche tosser:

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

My old man used to say, "money talks, but wealth whispers". A man of class, not a nouveau riche tosseur like Mr Beckham or his main callendar purchaser Punkape.

[Guest Snatch]

4 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

No, but I did have some friends who were serious thieves and I came up with an idea for their getaway cars, police pursuit drivers are shit hot and the average criminal doesn't have a hope of getting away, unless they've got 3 paparazzi style flash guns mounted facing backwards on the rear parcel shelf, triggered by a switch in the front as soon as the police car is up your arse, the police need a good 2 minutes before they can see properly again. And that was my idea, and I'm very proud of it!

And now the whole world knows it was you I suppose you'll be expecting that knock on the door from "The Man".

[Eric Cuntman]

3 minutes ago, Snatch said:

And now the whole world knows it was you I suppose you'll be expecting that knock on the door from "The Man".

The Duke of Edinburgh did give me a call in 1997, enquiring as to whether I had any ideas on how to get rid of 'that bloody tart and her Bedouin fancy man', dunno what all that was about.

[Cuntybaws]

2 hours ago, Wolfie said:

There are few things in life which say 'I'm a colossal cunt' more than someone purposefully ensuring the world knows they wear a Swiss-made, £1,000+ timepiece. Cue this nouveau-riche tosser:

And the prosecution rests.

[Wolfie]

6 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

And the prosecution rests.

In Flavor Flav's defence, his crack dealer never kept a watch.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

And the prosecution rests.

That kitchen clock makes a nice centre mass target bearing for anyone with a 7.62 sniper rifle.

[Guest Tata Steely Dan]

On 5/10/2017 at 3:58 PM, southerncunt said:

Following on from Wolfie's nom about cunt real estate agents, anyone who feels the need to advertise the maxim that money can't buy taste by wearing any watch bigger than 42mm across is similarly a cunt. Cunts getting around with fucking clocks on their wrists shit me to tears. Wake up to yourselves, for fucks sake.

So Ape, in other words.

[Ape™️]

3 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said:

So Ape, in other words.

Oh look, the drunken shambles that is Tata, has regained consciousness briefly, and has gifted us all with another of his hilarious posts.

[Guest Tata Steely Dan]

4 minutes ago, Ape said:

Oh look, the drunken shambles that is Tata, has regained consciousness briefly, and has gifted us all with another of his hilarious posts.

Get back to playing with toy helicopters, weirdo. 

[Ape™️]

Just now, Tata Steely Dan said:

Get back to playing with toy helicopters, weirdo. 

Go back to your alcohol, waster.

[Guest Tata Steely Dan]

Just now, Ape said:

Go back to your alcohol, waster.

because I'm Scottish? In the same way that you're some Southern English cunt that only knows how to go on endlessly about how expensive your shite possessions are. Weirdo. 

[Ape™️]

Just now, Tata Steely Dan said:

because I'm Scottish? In the same way that you're some Southern English cunt that only knows how to go on endlessly about how expensive your shite possessions are. Weirdo. 

You seem agitated. Is your dealer late tonight? Thick cunt.

lol.

Fuck off.