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Fat, Ugly, English Slags - In Bikinis


Ape™️

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Guest Snatch
6 minutes ago, Ape said:

Is it just me, or has anyone else noticed how Drew suddenly just pops up in threads and posts a load of off-topic fucking drivel? I'm convinced he's an alcoholic.

Talking of off topic drivel,Jazz has been quite lately.

Thank fuck.

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Guest Snatch
2 minutes ago, Ape said:

I'm sorry, but I don't see what on earth these comments have to do with my nomination. Are they an attempt at humour?

I think they are a weak attempt accusing you of being an irresponsible parent like the McCanns allegedly were/are.

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Guest Spanky
4 hours ago, Ape said:

I'm currently in Portugal with the family at a very nice all inclusive villa complex, which I believe may belong to Eddie. Anyway, it's all very pleasant, with good food, lovely accommodation and five swimming pools. However, I'm aghast at the number of English she-walrus monstrosities that feel it necessary, and even permissible, to wear a bikini. I'm actually amazed that such garments are even available, and suspect these fat slags have to commission someone to construct them, probably a sailmaker. What's even sadder is that these walruses seem to have reasonably normally proportioned husbands who, if you look closely, have a cold vacant expression on their faces that screams "if I'd known it would become a walrus - I'd have never fucked it".

Fuck off.

Serves you right for going on such a chavvy holiday. Are all the male guests wearing football shirts and bragging about how pissed they are from the all inclusive bar? Cunting British cunts make me sick.

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4 minutes ago, Spanky said:

Serves you right for going on such a chavvy holiday. Are all the male guests wearing football shirts and bragging about how pissed they are from the all inclusive bar? Cunting British cunts make me sick.

So, the fat slag phenomenon only occurs on certain types of holiday, eh? Interesting......

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Guest Snatch
14 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The one on the far right doesn't know whether to feel inadequate or slightly smug.

With that hair colour she's got nothing to feel smug about.

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Guest Spanky
2 minutes ago, Ape said:

So, the fat slag phenomenon only occurs on certain types of holiday, eh? Interesting......

Yep, pretty much. I went on an all inclusive holiday once. Never again. 

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2 hours ago, Bubba C said:

Rattled. 

One of your many weaknesses, bubba, as a wiseman once told me, is that your clearly not as cleaver as you think you are. Every cunt here can see this, leading to the conclusion you're extremely thick and your attempts to shit stir are just as obvious. At best you're a very poor mans decimus, someone who you've latched on to like a school yard weed-you even copy him with the brilliantly original rattled call. I expect the next line of attack would be someone's family as you've got some recent history here. Now run along and cry yourself to sleep like your aforementioned object of homo erotic hero worship does every time he dares to spar with his intellectual superior. 

Another weakness is you're also a slithering two faced cunt, something many here have told me. 

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Guest Bill Stickers
1 minute ago, Stubby Pecker said:

One of your many weaknesses, bubba, as a wiseman once told me, is that your clearly not as cleaver as you think you are. Every cunt here can see this, leading to the conclusion you're extremely thick and your attempts to shit stir are just as obvious. At best you're a very poor mans decimus, someone who you've latched on to like a school yard weed-you even copy him with the brilliantly original rattled call. I expect the next line of attack would be someone's family as you've got some recent history here. Now run along and cry yourself to sleep like your aforementioned object of homo erotic hero worship does every time he dares to spar with his intellectual superior. 

Another weakness is you're also a slithering two faced cunt, something many here have told me. 

For the record, you'll find rattled was my thing. I'm a trailblazer of sorts. 

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2 minutes ago, The Lady Penelope said:

Eddies's "villa" is in Birmingham. Its called Aston Villa

How very dare you, Eduardo only goes to the subcontinent to abuse the natives, I don't think he's got the chops to mess with the curry munchers of brum unless they were hassling some innocent maiden in the car park, the hero. 

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12 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

How very dare you, Eduardo only goes to the subcontinent to abuse the natives, I don't think he's got the chops to mess with the curry munchers of brum unless they were hassling some innocent maiden in the car park, the hero. 

I bet you book the same chalet in Butlins every summer. Egg and chips and a good old sing song, simple pleasures for simple people....

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3 hours ago, BuggerLugs said:

Mebbe there's a case for the burkini being made compulsory in public bathing areas for any tart over size 14, but only if you're a non-Islamic participant, I don't wanna be encouraging  tolerance and stuff.

OTOH, the fat fuckin chavs would soon be pimping em up to the point where they all look like that stupid fuckin batbird cunt and that would be a very bad thing indeed, case in point:

 

batman.png.6e178e3b38098dfad1630c310e921451.png 

I didn't know Brentford Nylons make clothes 

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3 minutes ago, Eddie said:

I bet you book the same chalet in Butlins every summer. Egg and chips and a good old sing song, simple pleasures for simple people....

I think you probably do bet, heavily. You're right though, I do love egg and chips, anyone who doesn't should be shot, and a love a good sing song with my kids.

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23 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

For the record, you'll find rattled was my thing. I'm a trailblazer of sorts. 

The greatest thing about being Decimus, apart from being the funniest cunt on here, is that not only do I get the blame for all of the so called clique's unpopular activities, I also appropriate everything entertaining that's ever been said by you.

Stubby,  kill yourself™

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3 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

I think you probably do bet, heavily. You're right though, I do love egg and chips, anyone who doesn't should be shot, and a love a good sing song with my kids.

I think it's important to have the occasional sing-song with kids, although my sister never asked me to babysit again after my nephew went back home knowing all the words to 'Shut Your Fucking Face Uncle Fucker' from South Park.

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