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Jiggerycock

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About Jiggerycock

  • Rank
    Unequivocal Cunt
  • Birthday March 27

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Narnia
  • Interests
    Turkish Delight. Battering fuck out the back of wardrobes. Lions and insertions into dwarves

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  1. Yeah Was vaguely involved with them on a minor level - unfortunately they called it a day last September
  2. And there advice is alwys the same: Keep wearing tin foil hats and chewing the carpet
  3. The Philosophers Song The Logician deconstructing Sir Bedevere's declaration of a witch "Toremolinos, Torremolinos" "Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elerberries" Mr Creosote ......there's more good stuff than shite, especially the films
  4. Good lady Jiggers had this cathode-ray piece of shit (the programme or La McGovern - take your pick) and I caught some of it, happily before tea, meaning the nausea it induced was controlable, you'll be pleased to hear. One little vignette to send you into your Thursday: Ms McGovern had her turds checked for gastric function and general digestive tract well-being, and scored worse than a Minkie Whale force fed rancid chip fat its entire life. Now if that little cameo isn't enough to sort out your premature ejaculation issues, then nothing will
  5. Pete and Dud 'One Legged Tarzan' sketch. "You're left leg I like. I have nothing against you're left leg. Unfortunately, nor do you."
  6. Good point - anyone heard from the lovelorn cunt recently? He usually surfaces when there's a Test Series going on, shoehorning in his Rembrandt / Rolf Harris similie into a rant about Root's captaincy and our lack of a decent wrist-spinner.
  7. Giant phallic nozzles re-enforcing the patriarchal, misogynistic heteroorthodxy of a failing society!! What do we want!!?? CLIT-SHAPED PUMPS!! When do we want it!!? ONLY WHEN WE ARE IN THE MOOD AND GIVE YOU PEMISSION YOU POTENTIAL 4-STAR RAPE FIEND!!
  8. Fuck I was aiming for 'Withnail'! Must do better.
  9. They're all into saving the planet, right up to the point where their private jets are no longer a tax write off and are actively pursued for Green Tax Dollars - then they're as good as shining laser beams into the eys of baby koala bears whilst hydrogen-bombing the Amazon. Monetise that shit!
  10. Why? Just because I go a bit Chaucerian every now and again, there's no need to vent spleen....prithee.
  11. I did the Ride Across Britain in 2017 (yeah that's me! Bertie Big Bollocks, who just needs to jerk off and there's a fully formed foetus in the toilet pan first thing next morning) and the number of lycra-clad fuckwits among our little troupe that cold not change a tyre, was a real source of 'red-mist' energy in getting up Cothelstone and Cheddar Gorge, I can tell you.
  12. Are you listening Pentland Hills!! This cunt got gubbed by a nose in the Champion Hurdle Trial at Haydock Park on Saturday, royally fucking over my stab at the Tote's 'Ten To Follow' competition. Little fucker deserves turning into a horsey kebab, never mind a Carpaccio from its delicately flavoured arse-cheeks.
  13. Is this an allusion to Joanna Lumley and her (alleged) rubber nipsy allegedly transplanted due to the ocean-going levels of Beak she shoveled up there in the sixties allegedly...allegedly..... (which, as calumny goes, beats the crap out of the Marc Almond one)
  14. Ooooh get her and her Oxford commas, finishing sentences with a preposition, knowing how to spell 'diarrhoea' and declarative gerunds in the house of Saturn (Jupiter rising - one of the best albums Jethro Tull ever did in my opinion).
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