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About Decimus

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    Somewhere the Hills would have eyes....If we had any hills.
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    Fuck off.

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  1. Decimus

    Let Toys Be Toys

    Spot on. It's refreshing to know that his absence hasn't changed him. He's as fucking shit as ever.
  2. Decimus

    Let Toys Be Toys

    Fuck off you high yellow, dirty French piece of greasy shit.
  3. Decimus

    Let Toys Be Toys

    There was a time, hard that it is to imagine, that I waited with bated breath for the next Frank post. We all live on past glories, to an extent, but "Walnut Head" was almost three years ago. His only nomination since then was some highly suspect shit about the oiled and sculpted torso of some redundant SAS cunt. What a useless, bent cunt.
  4. Decimus

    Let Toys Be Toys

    Lazy, complacent, blasé fucking cunt.
  5. Decimus


    An absolute fucking hole. Mancunians also appear to have taken over the role of national martyrs from their Scouse counterparts. They don't seem to be able to go five minutes these days without spontaneously bursting into a Godfuckingawful rendition of 'Don't Look Back In Anger' and banging on about what was at best a third rate terrorist attack. I wish Ariana Grande was dead.
  6. Decimus

    Beauty and The Flid

    Imagine that you'd gone to all the effort of sneaking into a disabled toilet and breaking one of societies biggest taboos. You're there minding your own business, feet splayed in front of you as you bask in the glory of a shitting experience like no other. Next thing you know, you feel a fliddy little hand tapping your gooch, and when you look down, some Stubbyesque spastic is squirming about at the bottom of the pan gnawing on one of your nuggets.
  7. Decimus

    Royal Wacky Races

    Don't worry. He'll never replace you in my affections, not only is the cunt as northern as a housewife's black eye, the hypocritical twat also married his chinky delivery driver.
  8. Decimus

    Royal Wacky Races

    Indeed, Pen. Ed, I couldn't give a fuck about the little monkey, or whether he might have one day grown up and managed to own his own watermelon. Calm yourself.
  9. Decimus

    Let Toys Be Toys

    I'd never come across these bunch of fucking toerags before today, but upon reading their twitter feed and various news articles, it's fair to say that I'm incensed. For those of you who don't know, 'Let Toys Be Toys' is a group that attempts to put pressure on the toy and children's entertainment industry to market their products on a gender neutral basis, so as not to exclude anyone. The latest product that has outraged them is the 1982 book, 'Dear Zoo', where a boy writes to a zoo and asks for a pet, and the zoo sends him various animals throughout the story, who all just happen to be male. Sounds innocent enough to me, but you can imagine the gasps of outrage that are currently echoing around a Vegan cafe in Shoreditch. "Wait, all the animals are male?! The main character is a male?! Is he at least bent as fuck, or a cross dresser?" "No." "You say the animals are all male, please God tell me that you at least mean female animals that have transitioned?" "No, they were all born with a cock and balls." "Fuck me! Call the fucking Guardian, get Owen Jones on speed dial. What do you mean Peter Tatchell is balls deep inside a Gambian? This is a fucking crisis, I want him here NOW." I'll leave you with one final thought, a review of a pop-up children's book from their Twitter feed, taken down verbatim. It would seem that certain members of left wing society aren't willing to wait until a boy goes to school before he's indoctrinated, they'd rather he was neutered with propaganda before he's finished shitting in a nappy: We like Janet and Allan Ahlberg books. In the scenes in the home there’s often a man/dad character doing household tasks, there’s Mrs Plug the Plumber, a mum going out to work in The Baby’s Catalogue...and the stories are always lovely too." Fucking disgraceful.
  10. Decimus

    Bob Monkhouse

    What does he know, the fat scotch cunt, he played for fucking Ipswich.
  11. Decimus

    Royal Wacky Races

    I don't particularly care that he's dead, he was undoubtedly a wrongun. But it's not your place to cast judgement on him He was a little cunt if the rumours are anything to be believed, but the only reason you want to denigrate him is because he's black. Shut your fucking mouth and think of his parents. You'll never know what it's like to lose a child, a bad one or a good one, so keep your opinions to yourself. Idiot.
  12. Decimus

    Royal Wacky Races

    The onset of senile dementia, or the antics of a stupid fucking cunt? I'll let the membership decide.
  13. Decimus

    Gemma Collins

    It's a lovely winters day, Pen, why don't you go outside and enjoy it? You've managed to crack off ten posts already today, and without exception, they have all been fucking shit. Turn off your humongous Windows 95 ran machine and choose life. Tuck your cock in your waistband, go for a wander and try to enjoy what remains of your pathetic existence.
  14. Decimus


    1) Children and the elderly are often exempt from following this to the letter. 2) It's none of your fucking business and it doesn't affect you in any shape or form. 3) Keep you bullshit opinions to yourself and shut your fucking mouth, you ticket stamping weirdo.
  15. Decimus

    Forced To Share

    Shut your fucking mouth and tuck your humongous cock betwixt your rashy shaven legs, you vile tranny freak. Leaderboard manipulation will not be tolerated.