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Ollyboro

Members
  • Content count

    895
  • Joined

  • Last visited

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744 Excellent

About Ollyboro

  • Rank
    Mahatma Cunt

Contact Methods

  • AIM
    Peace on earth
  • Yahoo
    Are a cunt
  • Jabber
    The cunt
  • Skype
    To the loo

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    The People Republic
  • Interests
    Kamikaze Cottaging, breast guesstimation, tampon removal, blood donation, arson, Simon Weston appreciation, confessional booth interference, pubic crocheting, amateur dramatics, involuntary euthanasia

Recent Profile Visitors

2,460 profile views
  1. Ollyboro

    Black Friday

    There is probably more than one reason as to why cunts sign up and don't post. Them joining up, then instantly dying is the one that fills my heart with the greatest joy. But generally speaking I suspect nerves is the most common denominator, followed by fear that an employer, or parent might find out about their true personalities. I'm sure more than one prospective punter has been put off by the possibility of Spunkers tracking him down and bumming him. And never underestimate the difficulty in getting hold of mobile phone top-ups for category A prisoners.
  2. Ollyboro

    Social Prescribing

    Big fucking deal. So are Rolf Harris and Gary Glitter. (edit: misread "nurse".)
  3. Ollyboro

    May I strictly come dance in Africa.

    Judy's just trying to be trendy. He's probably heard one of the Kardashian's doing it and thinks it'll mark him out as one of the it crowd. It's him asking for "extra cucumber" from sweaty Turkish blokes that's troubling me.
  4. Ollyboro

    May I strictly come dance in Africa.

    As it happens I was taught Geography by the finest teacher of Braille Geography the world has ever fucking known. Unfortunately I can't feel Braille, so I still didn't know where I was.
  5. Ollyboro

    May I strictly come dance in Africa.

    You're coming across as someone more interested in meat than bush. Apologies if I've got you all wrong and that, in fact, you're not a wrong 'un. Although "BUSHMEAT" spelled out in capital letters suggests you're a shouty Aussie, in which case fuck off. I'll never forgive Captain Cook for finding you cunts.
  6. Ollyboro

    Ian Naude

    I could be misremembering (excuse the Hillaryism) , but I'm sure Frank once claimed he lived in a castle with a massive crocodile infested moat.
  7. Ollyboro

    Eh?

    Judy and Frank, you mean? Couldn't agree more - pair of cunts. Now as how to punish the Coombe family, we need to defrost their microwave chips or something. Show them we mean business.
  8. Ollyboro

    Eh?

    Agree to a point, JT, but I also think you're not giving Mrs Coombe enough credit for modelling Herr herrcut (see what I etc) on Hitler's. And Mr Coombe is showing remarkable restraint considering he has modelled himself on a join the dots Neo-Nazi who's clearly bringing up three kids that aren't his (only one is sporting a set of Himmler goggles). His taste in soft furnishings is quite beige and suggests he shoplifts at Dunelm Mill, which shows a degree of consideration, since there's no chance of me running into the cunt.
  9. Ollyboro

    Inappropriate people advertising products

    We live in a world in which Theresa May is selling us the joys of Brexit - after campaigning to remain, and Jeremy Corbyn is posing as a Remainer, despite consistently voting alongside Eurosceptics AND sticking one up Dianne Abbott's shitter. Based on all that, why not let Rolf Harris advertise Pampers? Why not let Simon Weston advertise Garnier skincare? Why not let Michael McIntyre advertise himself as a comedian? We live in a post-truth world where the truth is whatever you want it to be. And I say that as someone with a 300mm cock (11.811 inches after Brexit - we got our penises back).
  10. Ollyboro

    The Cenotaph Anorak v2.0

    Well, Wallis Simpson was rumoured to be expert in the art of deep throating, so for a member of the royal family to get a deep noshing on tap, without having to pay a French strumpet, must have been a real eye-opener. As for Yoko, Lennon was off his tits on high strength Timothy Leary juice, so her "art" must have seemed interesting. And it must have made a nice change for John from having that old poof Epstein sniffing round his bellend. Say what you like about Camilla, but at least she's not an attention seeking bulimic with a propensity for base jumping down the palace stairs. So what has Abbott got to offer? Well, apart from an unrivalled ability to play croquet with her cock - and I can't see that impressing Jezza - it's difficult to imagine. But I'll give it a shot. I reckon she used to put a Thatcher mask on and fuck him right up his scraggy arse. Then make the cocoa.
  11. Ollyboro

    Shuada' Davitt. aka Sinead O`Connor

    Homosexual.
  12. Ollyboro

    Wheelchair Fan in Paddy Power Ad

    Time/chronology is just a human construct. It's just something we need as a species to remind us it's breakfast time, time for the visit to the dentist, time to die etc. And we've got it pretty bang on. The alternative measurements of time passing would be nowhere near as satisfactory. Consider the following conversation (neither protagonist is black or disabled). Person 1) What time is it? Person 2) I don't know. But Halley's Comet has just appeared. P1) I know the last time I asked you what the time was you mentioned Halley's Comet had just appeared, but what time is it now? P2) What are the fucking odds on that? The one and only time I've ever fucking met you Halley's Comet had just appeared, and you asked me the time. The second time I meet you, you ask me the same question - just as Halley's Comet appears again! P1) Oi! Are you the cunt who on the 2 previous occasions Halley's Comet appeared didn't give me a straight answer to the question "what time is it?" P2) Really sorry, mate, but I was distracted, waiting for Fre... Frank to say something funny.
  13. Ollyboro

    Jess Phillips

    I still look back at my own sex education lessons with a shudder. The anticipation was rudely spoiled two seconds after the textbooks were distributed. Opening the pages revealed a woman with a blut as hairy as a Jamaican barber's floor. Up till this point the only minges I'd clapped eyes on had had fine, wispy hair (Apart from the time I'd walked in on my Aunty Barbara shitting on a glass coffee table). Suddenly I was presented with something resembling a guardsman's hat. And as for the weird bloke with the small cock....I couldn't work out if he had a beard, or if hairy Mary was moulting and her gleet had stuck her loose clock springs to his face. I was so traumatised I left further education that day.
  14. Ollyboro

    Brexit..the meltdown has begun

    To suggest that you have nothing further to offer the Corner would be wrong, because that would imply that you had anything to offer in the first place. Let's look at the fucking facts, Fred. A couple of weeks ago you were openly begging for likes, now we find you begging Jizzer to finish you off. F fucking naar. What are you expecting, you stupid prick? Everycunt to beg you to stay? This is the Corner, not a shit KC and the Sunshine Band song. You leaving would be about as disappointing as Lennie Henry replacing Lennie Bennett as the funny black character in the Dudley Players 1973 pantomime. ie nobody cares. Do a video of you hanging yourself with your skinny jeans and I'll chuck you a like. Deal?
  15. Ollyboro

    Cousins

    Once he's finished coming in his (or whoever's) pants, I'm sure he will.
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