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Cap'n Cunt

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About Cap'n Cunt

  • Rank
    Massive Cunt

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    .... A big house with three shitters
  • Interests
    Bludgeoning

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  1. Cap'n Cunt

    Egg Boy

    Fraser Anning (Australian senator) might be seen as a bit of a cunt by some people, having proclaimed that the Muslim massacre in New Zealand was caused by too many Muslims being in New Zealand. Some might say he's a bit of a cunt, some might see the logic in his thinking. Enter Egg Boy, who thinks it's a jolly wheeze to smash an egg on Fraser Anning's head. Exit Egg Boy, having been punched in the gob a couple of times by Mr. Anning. A good thing, in my opinion. I'd like to see more violence in politics as a whole, and Westminster in particular. Anyway, a bunch of Lefties have started one of their ubiquitous fucking crowdfunding things in support of Egg Boy. Have these fuckers got nothing better to spend their money on, FFS? Thankfully, Egg Boy has promised to give at least some of this money to people who may pretend to be related to the dead Muslims, so everybody wins, really.
  2. It's a shame they were girls. Otherwise they'd have known how to switch the fucking thing back on.
  3. I had a C130. It was a bit plain.
  4. I once owned a Citroen C8, and it was absolute shite.
  5. Who's that twat shaking a K&N air filter off of a Suzuki GT250? Weird cunt.
  6. I'd stick a firework up her cunt.
  7. I hope they're all white and middle class. Wouldn't trust darkies or poor people with valuable stuff.
  8. Tee hee hee! Three layers of minges!
  9. Now that the lovely Princess Meghan has been schooled into the proper way of behaving as a member of our wonderful Royal Family, Buckingham Palace have mysteriously found themselves with a surplus of bananas. Ever-thoughtful Meghan has come up with a top idea, all on her own: 'Let's write messages of affirmation on them, and give them to prostitiutes in Bristol!' So, after diligently instructing some of her humble footmen to write things such as 'You Are Special', 'You Are Brave' and 'You Are Strong' on the bananas, they were distributed to the raddled crack whores of Brislington. Anna Kryskov, who came over from Lithuania last year to study Benefits, was so thrilled with hers that she offered to stick it, unpeeled, up her cunt for five English pounds while we watched.
  10. Hawkeye the noo, you fucking spaz. And while I'm here @Mrs Roops why was my Banana Bunch nom deleted? Was it because I .......
  11. Foreign footballist Emiliano Sala has done a bit of a Glenn Miller and disappeared in a small aircraft somewhere between France and Cardiff. Silly French cunts should have launched him into the Channel on a Lidl's rubber dinghy, then our 'Border Force' would have picked him up and ferried him across to Dover once he got twenty yards out from Calais.
  12. Ticks all the boxes. Would tick more boxes if one of them was disabled, or blind, or actually.......no, you can't have fucking white people winning, that would be wacist.
  13. Asking for a friend is a bit of a lost cause on here. Unless you're a bummer.
  14. I bought at least 4 pounds worth of Lidl faux chocolate for Halloween - I don't want chavvy cunts chucking eggs at my windows. Thankfully, none of these ne'er-do-wells actually turned up, so now I have a mountain of cheap 'chocolat' to eat. If I become diabetic, I'll blame America for this imported shite.
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