Last Cunt Standing

Just keep paying those taxes then. William is so terribly grateful for the crushed silk toilet roll you’re funding for his tattered arsehole. Cuck.

Francis, we’ve never crossed swords on The Corner and I have no wish to start. I’ll ignore your “tiny mind” swing, and simply say that I don’t believe the official version of “the illness”, believe there is a much darker explanation, and have very good reason to think so. The photos are a bit of a clue. But, feel free to get back to mincing about the overpriced Gentleman’s Outfitters you inhabit, the truth will be along momentarily. Keep watching.

I’d say she’s got one. A six-foot red-headed skin tumour who she’ll likely have cut out and binned at some point. Don’t be distracted from the main event though. Something very bleak is afoot in Windsor.

All due respect, so none, fuck off. I’ll post what I like thanks. Christ knows any semblance of quality control or self-censorship seems to be a thing of the past round here these days, so if on my infrequent visits I feel like recording an ongoing lie being peddled on the public, I will. I’m surprised by your indifference to be honest, the idea that the heir to the throne might be permitting some elaborate deception to play out while he puts his feet up between his 2 hours of public work per week should be lighting a fire in your taxpaying belly. I can only presume you and those like you are so anaesthetised by the Daily Mail that your critical thinking skills are duller than a February day in Coventry. Take a close look at the pictures. Is the woman passenger in the Audi, the woman at the Windsor Farmers Market, and the woman on the garden bench supposed to be the same person? Not only are they lying to you, they’re laughing about it, too.

Obviously, Bill. Maybe we can pencil in one of the doubles for Royal Ascot?

110 days now since the Princess of Wales was incontrovertibly seen in public. Those trips to the Windsor Farm Shop seem to have stopped then? In case you had any doubt, they’re laughing at you.

Yeah? It might get a bit weirder yet. Keep watching.

104 days today since the Princess of Wales was incontrovertibly seen in public. It’s an awfully long time, is it not?

And where the fuck have you been? Come waltzing back in here, off your tits on Maple Syrup I shouldn’t wonder. Look around you, can’t you see there’s work to be done round here? Honestly, some people….

Believe that Eric, and I’ve got a Bridge in Baltimore to sell you. 96 days, if you’re keeping score.

Bill, I’m talking to you now from the mean streets of Kalgoorlie, a fly-blown dusty hole 650km east of Perth, famous for a giant hole in the ground and Australia’s oldest knocking shop. My mates and I spent Good Friday biking over here, and took over a pub for the evening. Much talk of the Canberra Government’s new Digital ID laws which I am sure will pull your chain when you hear of it. We spilled out into the street to find wild packs of Indigenous kids engaged in what I can only presume was a Mad Max themed Easter Egg Hunt, though maybe smashing the windows in the ANZ was a bit over-enthusiastic. Returning to my hotel, I see footage of Queen Sidepiece doling out 75p in purses to old dementia patients, Putin moving his Navy into the Red Sea, and I thank Christ I’m in the middle of nowhere until May. Off for Egg and Bacon now before today’s leg of our trip. Oh, and in case I forget….Jeffrey Donaldson. One of yours, no?

“The Establishment” is not confined to any Nation, Bill. Australia has its elite too. They have lied, cheated, and stolen for decades. Change is coming. The people will not be constrained much longer. incidentally, 92 days now since Katie made a public appearance. This weekend is the fabled Easter deadline. Ten of my Aussie Dollars says we don’t see her doing any Royal “work” this year.

Jesus Christ man, get off your knees. Surely the one thing we’ve all learnt once again from this debacle is that the establishment despise you and treat you with utter contempt. It’s long past time you returned fire.

Drip, drip, drip. This is only the beginning.

Darren? Are you on fucking glue?

I sort of agree. There’s a salt-of-the-earth quality to Charlotte that probably gives her the edge. I imagine she’d do a great full English, after she’s given you the full Welsh. And the Greek.

Sometimes the Corner is a Baron wilderness, then you happen upon this oasis of mirth. Bravo, EC.

Eric, you need a little bromide in your tea. Last week Charlotte Church, this week Liz Hurley. Just out of interest, if you had to choose, who gets first go?

Russian Intelligence are reportedly of the belief that 2000 French Troops will be in Ukraine before the Summer. A few weeks of instructing the Ukrainians in their fine traditions and Ivan should be in Warsaw by September. Macron’s played a blinder here.

Careful there Dear Leader, resorting to brutish sexism when challenged might be considered passé.

I’m warming to the notion you’re female after all DC, given your increasing fondness for the unsolicited whinge. Half the world’s banging on at length about the Royals right now, if you’re blissfully unaware of that on Plague Island, you might very well wonder why.

To return to the topic at hand…83 days now since Katie’s last appearance. Not available until after Easter was the story…well, they’ve got 2 weeks till this unholy mess really boils over. The truth will out.

And? Females can have penises. I’ve read it in The Telegraph. If you have come back as an XX genotype on 23andme though, I’d be tempted to ring them and ask for a recount. Just sayin’.

“D notice” might have not been right without a national security angle. But the omertà in the UK media amounts to pretty much the same thing. It’s cracking though, it seems. Get fucked yourself, and may you soon experience the terror of a rip-roaring penile cancer.

I clearly missed my calling.