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So the Thin White Duke adopted his final persona, the Thin Dead Cunt, a little over three years ago. Yet the BBC, annoying liberal generation X-ers and muso cunts alike still won't give it a fucking rest. David Bowie was a louche philanderer, pervert and plagiarist who stole ideas and aesthetics from artists and genres left, right and center. Perhaps he had the foresight to rip off things other people hadn't considered ripping off (like mime, or Kabuki theater), but he was a pilfering cokehead of limited talent all the same. He sung those stupid, impenetrable lyrics in that stupid warbling voice, fucked 14 year olds and snorted heaps of coke. He is vastly overrated; especially when it comes to his horrible wigger funk period in the mid '70s, or his interminably dull "Berlin period" after that. Plus, nobody remembers the dumb shit like Tin Machine or the yards of boring folkie stuff he put out before Space Oddity. I digress. Major Tom is a dead degenerate cunt. Can BBC4 please stop being a fucking shrine to this overrated dead cunt, and find better things to do with my licence fee instead?
So, I settled down to watch the BBC's version of Hercule Poirot . Not usually interested in historical drama about bloody foreigners, but it was Malkovich, who can usually put in a decent turn, so I gave it a go. Imagine my disappointment when I find the BBC had hired a writer to turn Agatha Christie's mystery story into some politically correct, bullshit propaganda, broadcast, probably to keep the LGBT brigade happy. If the BBC wants to waste my licence fee spouting that sort of shite, they should do it with their own specially written screenplays for twatty, bum-fuck rug-munching, right-on, snowflakes and quit fucking about with a classic crime author. What a shower of cunts !
So I made the mistake of watching the BBC news at 10:00 on two separate occasions this week. Same bollocks, twice over. Each time there was ten minutes about that poisoned Skripal cunt. No way the Russians did it, as the cunt is still alive. Right? Useful for hushing up the Telford abuse scandal though, right? We haven't heard anything about that since that dude didn't die of poisoning. But Porton Down! Porton Down! Then you get five minutes of random sandpit warfare. Some mother sobbing away next to a pile of rubble, some unverified mobile footage of Allah Akbar explosions somewhere. Some under-equipped 3rd world doctor trying to do surgery while mortar rounds thud outside. All very miserable, no end in sight, better send in the frumpy Northern Ireland wifey to report on it while wearing a flak vest and a tin helmet. If the reporter is a man then we have to get the shaky camera 'OMG it is all kicking off' bullshit as he runs through a street to find shelter. Then you get some touchy feely story about a wee girl with a disability, or a preachy one about the sodium levels in school dinners or something. Utter bollocks. BBC news isn't the news any more, it is a weird dystopian soap opera for miserable people. Enough interesting shit doesn't happen in 24 hours to warrant wasting 45 minutes of everybody's time every single day of the week. You either have to invent it, misreport it or dress up banal shite as news.
Why the fuck, with all the hundreds of TV channels now available, have the BBC fucked the entire evening BBC TWO schedule for fucking Darts? Instead of watching cunts getting the shit ripped out of them for their shite inventions on Dragon's Den, the whole evening is full of Fosters swigging, fat bald cunts. I've known for a long time that the BBC are cunts, but this is a new low.