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Alistair Fucking Appleton


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This Garden Invading, Cash in the Attic modern-day metrosexual fucking mincing scrotard chutter hippie bastard needs pulled out of the dark recesses of Rhona Cameron's gaping man-womb and beaten to fucking death with a tyre lever. Just listening to this shirt-lifting quince pancake makes you feel slightly gay and in need of a fucking scrub. An effete, poetry loving, Escape to the Country, armchair psychotherapist, Proms introducing, Buddhist, Morris dancing wanker. Fuck off back to Tunbridge Wells and kill yourself, you Stately supper, dinner mashing fire hazard, goat-blowing lavender menace wanker. Daisy Duke's a cunt.

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