Ape™️ Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 I have to pop into town today to pick up some items of stationary, and so decided to go into W H Smiths. Upon entering I was immediately confronted by an unpleasant odour, but had no idea where or what it was coming from. As I continued round the shop I walked through several pockets of intense aroma, where it really was strong. The smell was a combination of body odour, urine and shit, and it was really starting to make me feel quite sick. Anyway, curiosity prevailed and I decided I must find the source of this vile aroma. Then I saw it. A long haired, bearded, filthy, tracksuit wearing piece of scum, looking like he'd never washed in his entire life. At ground zero the smell was truly unbearable, with people close by visibly horrified by the stench. I left the store as fast as I could, desperate for fresh air. How people get into such a state is beyond me and actually quite sad, since they are clearly unaware of the effect they are having on others. Dirty, smelly fucking cunts. Fuck off. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 That will teach you to stalk me then Ape, you cheeky cunt. Fuck with the bull and you get the horns. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mingeeta Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 Hopefully Fwank is stinking a bit. That will mean he is decomposing in his bedsit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 44 minutes ago, Ape said: Then I saw it. A long haired, bearded, filthy, tracksuit wearing piece of scum, looking like he'd never washed in his entire life. Pansy baby, has a deceased aunt left you some cash, from which you reluctantly caught a ferry to England in search of a labouring job? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 WH Smiths? Are you a coffin dodger? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 53 minutes ago, Ape said: I have to pop into town today to pick up some items of stationary, and so decided to go into W H Smiths. Upon entering I was immediately confronted by an unpleasant odour, but had no idea where or what it was coming from. As I continued round the shop I walked through several pockets of intense aroma, where it really was strong. The smell was a combination of body odour, urine and shit, and it was really starting to make me feel quite sick. Anyway, curiosity prevailed and I decided I must find the source of this vile aroma. Then I saw it. A long haired, bearded, filthy, tracksuit wearing piece of scum, looking like he'd never washed in his entire life. At ground zero the smell was truly unbearable, with people close by visibly horrified by the stench. I left the store as fast as I could, desperate for fresh air. How people get into such a state is beyond me and actually quite sad, since they are clearly unaware of the effect they are having on others. Dirty, smelly fucking cunts. Fuck off. If you ask me, and you haven't, I know, the disgusting cretin was doing it to justify asking for more, more, more at the benefits centre! You would have been justified in securely grasping the nearest heavy blunt object and beating the cunt to death. It takes a big heart to resist such an act. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 I didn't think there was a need for full length mirrors in WH Smith. They haven't started selling clothing have they Ape? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 3 hours ago, Bill Stickers said: WH Smiths? Are you a coffin dodger? They didn't have WH Smiths when I was a lad, we were lumbered with John fucking Menzies. On the plus side, though, they would cheerfully accept my Xmas book & gift tokens in exchange for tobacco products. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 20 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: They didn't have WH Smiths when I was a lad, we were lumbered with John fucking Menzies. On the plus side, though, they would cheerfully accept my Xmas book & gift tokens in exchange for tobacco products. Fuck me, John Menzies and Our Price Records. Steve Jobs was a cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 30 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: They didn't have WH Smiths when I was a lad, we were lumbered with John fucking Menzies. On the plus side, though, they would cheerfully accept my Xmas book & gift tokens in exchange for tobacco products. Each time I consider I may be among the oldest here, there's a gentle reminder such as this to put my mind at rest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 Whereas the smell of model helicopters, Ginsters pasties and smegma is the smell of angels themselves. People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 34 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: Whereas the smell of model helicopters, Ginsters pasties and smegma is the smell of angels themselves. People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Fuck off, dan, you filthy jock cunt. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 Just now, Bubba C said: Fuck off, dan, you filthy jock cunt. I hope that your policy of keeping your tongue safely lodged up Ape's arse is paying off for you, Bubkins. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 1 hour ago, Bubba C said: Fuck me, John Menzies and Our Price Records. Steve Jobs was a cunt. I sense a tear in you're eye as you remember buying those Erasure 7 inches.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 5 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: I hope that your policy of keeping your tongue safely lodged up Ape's arse is paying off for you, Bubkins. What in all of string vest wearing, deep fried mars bar munching, dirty skag mainlining fuck are you on about? Have you been at the sauce again? As there was only 15 inches of rain in your dreary, grey, scumbag town today, it must've felt like a summer holiday to you. Fuck off. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 1 minute ago, Bubba C said: What in all of string vest wearing, deep fried mars bar munching, dirty skag mainlining fuck are you on about? Have you been at the sauce again? As there was only 15 inches of rain in your dreary, grey, scumbag town today, it must've felt like a summer holiday to you. Fuck off. I love it when Celtic brothers get together for banter. Makes me envious of their proud cultures 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 26, 2017 Author Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 49 minutes ago, Tata Steely Dan said: Whereas the smell of model helicopters, Ginsters pasties and smegma is the smell of angels themselves. People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Looks like Dan is drunk again. What do you imagine model helicopters to smell of, you spectacularly stupid cunt? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 from dealing with the general public through my job or just having to do the weekly stuff like shopping i fully support this nom for the stinky Wankers , if i can take the time to at least give the downstairs a scrub and wack on a bit of brutt' sanitize the cunts in acid i say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 49 minutes ago, Bubba C said: What in all of string vest wearing, deep fried mars bar munching, dirty skag mainlining fuck are you on about? Have you been at the sauce again? As there was only 15 inches of rain in your dreary, grey, scumbag town today, it must've felt like a summer holiday to you. Fuck off. Try harder you Taff wank, and Ape might even start liking your posts. Sycophant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PANZER MURPHY Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 3 hours ago, Drew P Pissflaps said: I didn't think there was a need for full length mirrors in WH Smith. They haven't started selling clothing have they Ape? What he said aperz baby Panzerknacker Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Spanky Posted July 26, 2017 Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 2 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: They didn't have WH Smiths when I was a lad, we were lumbered with John fucking Menzies. On the plus side, though, they would cheerfully accept my Xmas book & gift tokens in exchange for tobacco products. Whatever happened to John Menzies? I had a paper round with them and got to look at all the boobs for free in the Daily Sport. Now there's a paper that's not afraid to tell the truth. How about throwing a couple of Pullitzers their way instead of at the fake news media all the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 26, 2017 Author Report Share Posted July 26, 2017 8 minutes ago, Panzerknacker said: What he said aperz baby Panzerknacker You are clearly incapable of: 1). Coherent speech. 2). Independent thought. 3). Contributing to society. I'd say it's time to kill yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 27, 2017 Report Share Posted July 27, 2017 How's the head, dan, you drunken little thicko? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted July 27, 2017 Report Share Posted July 27, 2017 19 hours ago, Mingeeta said: Hopefully Fwank is stinking a bit. That will mean he is decomposing in his bedsit. Its only ex pubic(sic) schoolboys like Punker's who stink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 27, 2017 Author Report Share Posted July 27, 2017 15 hours ago, Tata Steely Dan said: Try harder you Taff wank, and Ape might even start liking your posts. Sycophant. Fuck off Dan. 2 hours ago, Bubba C said: How's the head, dan, you drunken little thicko? Have a like Bubba. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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