Seat Toledo Servicing

[Eric Cuntman]

11 minutes ago, FuckOff said:

Please do try to keep up, that point has been covered before.
I know exactly my own worth so I do not care a monkeys chuff box what prats like you and others think in the (Y)UK with your boring little existences.

He's Australian.

[southerncunt]

6 minutes ago, FuckOff said:

Please do try to keep up, that point has been covered before.
I know exactly my own worth so I do not care a monkeys chuff box what prats like you and others think in the (Y)UK with your boring little existences.

Prat??

Is that the best you can offer? And the sad thing is, you took your time to answer.

As is glaringly obvious, you are impotent and add nothing. You are the Polish cavalry.

Again, you are nothing. A vacuum. Come back when you have gone through puberty.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 minute ago, southerncunt said:

Prat??

Is that the best you can offer? And the sad thing is, you took your time to answer.

As is glaringly obvious, you are impotent and add nothing. You are the Polish cavalry.

Again, you are nothing. A vacuum. Come back when you have gone through puberty.

He might use his internet ninja skills to track you down and come after you with his pig rifle SC. if I were you, I'd ask the Victoria State Library if you can borrow Ned Kelly's home made armour. 

[southerncunt]

4 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

He might use his internet ninja skills to track you down and come after you with his pig rifle SC. if I were you, I'd ask the Victoria State Library if you can borrow Ned Kelly's home made armour. 

I have two important things in my favour, Eric.

1. I’m on the other side of the planet.

2. He’s a fucking made up idiot.

[Guest FuckOff]

21 minutes ago, Dawn Chorus said:

I have turned the engine over several times but it won't start!

Just accept that it's fucked and scrap it, better still, torch it.

[Guest FuckOff]

14 minutes ago, southerncunt said:

Prat??

Is that the best you can offer? And the sad thing is, you took your time to answer.

As is glaringly obvious, you are impotent and add nothing. You are the Polish cavalry.

Again, you are nothing. A vacuum. Come back when you have gone through puberty.

Unlike sad people such as you, I don't spend all of my time sitting in front of a PC screen.

[Trucking Funt]

1 minute ago, FuckOff said:

Unlike sad people such as you, I don't spend all of my time sitting in front of a PC screen.

It's quite clear you're taking a mauling when you're reduced to such a lame response. Why don't you go and put some sexy lingerie on and make yourself feel better.

[Guest FuckOff]

18 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

He's Australian.

Ah! OK, that does explain a lot. Now I can understand why he is so thick!

Probably the descendant of transported sheep shagger.

[Guest FuckOff]

1 minute ago, Trucking Funt said:

It's quite clear you're taking a mauling when you're reduced to such a lame response. Why don't you go and put some sexy lingerie on and make yourself feel better.

You call this pathetic drivel a mauling. I was told that some big guns were coming to melt me down! So far just .177 Diana air pistols.
 

[southerncunt]

4 minutes ago, FuckOff said:

Unlike sad people such as you, I don't spend all of my time sitting in front of a PC screen.

You seem to. You have been handed your arse. Put it in your bag and fuck off.

Oh, and another thing. Sheep shagger? Do try harder.
 

The only thing getting fucked here is you, my friend.

[Trucking Funt]

Just now, FuckOff said:

You call this pathetic drivel a mauling. I was told that some big guns were coming to melt me down! So far just .177 Diana air pistols.
 

72 posts so far and all you've managed is a pile of billy big bollocks bullshit that an 8 year old could see through and a few whimpers. Up your game or fuck off. This is pitiful to the point of embarrassing for you.

[Guest FuckOff]

31 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

He's Australian.

 

[Roadkill]

6 hours ago, FuckOff said:

OK as promised, now the derision has sort of subsided, a photo of my imaginary Lamborghini. Apeshit needs to have more faith in what members write.

It's my very early Lamborghini crawler tractor that's been sitting outside for a few years that literally looks like a barn find, water had got into the gearbox and rusted the two clutches into a solid mass. The gearbox has new seals fitted and has been flushed and refilled. I also did a major overhaul of the hydraulic system that lifts the disc plough up and down.
The engine is now stripped down and the cylinders and pistons are ready to be serviced.
When the tractor is rebuilt and re-painted I'll post up another photo.

 

Is it at least fast when it works? For a tractor, I mean.

[Eric Cuntman]

2 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Is it at least fast when it works? For a tractor, I mean.

Ferruccio Lamborghini built his first sports car in 1963 because he wanted something like a Ferrari, but didn't want to pay Enzo the extortionate price he was charging for them.

I think Peugot started out making coffee grinders and pushbikes. Jeremy Clarkson is responsible for a large part of my education.

[Eric Cuntman]

11 minutes ago, Arthur Dick said:

What's your take on this? Do you reckon it was true?

 

https://cryptidz.fandom.com/wiki/Burrunjor

Have you heard of 'Drop Bears'?

It's a mythical creature, used as a wind-up for tourists. The Aussie tourism workers tell the outback safari goers that a viciously aggressive strain of Koala bears, hide in trees, wait for people to walk underneath, and drop down and savage them with their extra big teeth and claws.

[Stubby Pecker]

1 hour ago, FuckOff said:

Apparently it's Frank the wank's stock in trade to do the 'I know where you live gambit'. The pathetic cunt couldn't even drive down here without fucking up his car, so how the fuck he'll get to me beggars belief!

Yes, Frank does know where I live but as yet failed to turn up. With the self doxing tripe you've already shat out here in a few short days, it lead me and others to narrow you down to a few individuals. We'll PM you your photo and address when we've concluded.  

[ratcum]

1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Yes, Frank does know where I live but as yet failed to turn up. With the self doxing tripe you've already shat out here in a few short days, it lead me and others to narrow you down to a few individuals. We'll PM you your photo and address when we've concluded.  

never mind all that shite Stubbed, how is the BBC expected to let us know when someone has used the N-word without actually using the N-word? Frau rat reckons that by saying N-word, we'll know they really meant the N- word. But I reckon the story might just be about someone using the N-word. Like "you're a fuckin N-word cunt you are!" like I just have.

help me out here

[Eric Cuntman]

22 minutes ago, ratcum said:

never mind all that shite Stubbed, how is the BBC expected to let us know when someone has used the N-word without actually using the N-word? Frau rat reckons that by saying N-word, we'll know they really meant the N- word. But I reckon they the story might just be about someone using the N-word. Like "you're a fuckin N-word cunt you are!" like I just have.

help me out here

"No no Fawlty. W**s are from India. N*****s are from Africa"

[Eric Cuntman]

46 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Yes, Frank does know where I live but as yet failed to turn up. With the self doxing tripe you've already shat out here in a few short days, it lead me and others to narrow you down to a few individuals. We'll PM you your photo and address when we've concluded.  

What's happened recently. The new intake seems riddled with wormy shite. The only good one is Weary & Disgusted. 

Actually, Arthur dick is alright too.

[Roadkill]

2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Ferruccio Lamborghini built his first sports car in 1963 because he wanted something like a Ferrari, but didn't want to pay Enzo the extortionate price he was charging for them.

I think Peugot started out making coffee grinders and pushbikes. Jeremy Clarkson is responsible for a large part of my education.

Never liked any Lambo, but I would have a go in a Ferrari F40 if the opportunity presented itself. The rest of their overpriced shit doesn't interest me in the least. And Porsche can fuck off - the perfect representation of the complete lack of German imagination - just like BMW, Audi, and Merc, it all looks exactly the fucking same.

[Stubby Pecker]

30 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

What's happened recently. The new intake seems riddled with wormy shite. The only good one is Weary & Disgusted. 

Actually, Arthur dick is alright too.

Indeed. All this @FuckOff character has managed to do is get on the tits of the entire puntership and make himself look and weapons grade bullshiter in the process. Mincing in here and claiming this and that is the road to ruin as these comments will be used to goad the cretin for all eternity. Thanks for PMing me the details of prime suspect number 2 by the way, we'll know where to post the dog shit by the weeks end.

Queery and A Dick have made good accounts of themselves so far in my book.

 

[Eric Cuntman]

14 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Never liked any Lambo, but I would have a go in a Ferrari F40 if the opportunity presented itself. The rest of their overpriced shit doesn't interest me in the least. And Porsche can fuck off - the perfect representation of the complete lack of German imagination - just like BMW, Audi, and Merc, it all looks exactly the fucking same.

Why pay 180 grand for an Italian car that's going to go wrong every week, when Nissan will sell you a GTR that will piss all over most of them for 70 grand. And being Japanese, it won't break down. If you absolutely have to have an Italian ornamental rocket, get a Maserati..

When people see a Ferrari pull up, they think, 'Wanker'.. when they see a Maserati, they think, 'Classy!'

[Bubba C]

9 hours ago, FuckOff said:

But do you like me. (Dick Emery for those not in the know)

Fuck off. 

[King Billy]

On 05/08/2020 at 19:02, FuckOff said:

Some cunt here mentioned that servicing my Seat Toledo is cheap. Not so.
Although I don’t have a Seat in my collection I have started work on renovating my Lamborghini (I’ll post up pix when the derision dies down).

I pulled out the engine and started to strip it down, the two clutch plates were badly worn so a trip to San Pedro de Alcantara this morning to get them sent off to Málaga for new facings.
I’ve replaced the release bearings with pattern parts not Lambo OEM stuff.
The heads came off easily ready for cleaning and grinding in the valves. The cylinder bores look OK with no steps. The pistons also came out fairly easily, however I noticed that there was one broken ring.
So tomorrow I’m biting on the bullet and taking the cylinders and pistons to a specialist workshop in Algeciras, Cádiz province where they will I’m sure, at great expense, hone the bores and fit new piston rings.
I’m doing all of this outside in 35ºC+ heat and getting burnt to bits.(it was 43.5ºC here last Saturday).

What a cunt I hear you all thinking, and you’re correct.

I used to have a place in Marbella, opposite the Puenta Romano hotel. I lived there for seven years but to be honest the winters got so boring, same people, same social life (Milady Palace) etc. that I sold up and moved back to London. Sometimes I wish I’d stayed over there, but not that often. I’ve always liked SAN Pedro and Estepona and could never stand the ponciness of Puerto Banus.

[Stubby Pecker]

1 hour ago, Bubba C said:

Fuck off. 

Bubs, although I hate your fuck guts, in the absence of nasty smart arse cunts like bill and decs, we need your vileness to destroy this wanker