Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 Been out the front of the house this morning doing a few jobs on my aged work and shopping basher car, and noticed one of my neighbours casually walking onto another neighbours property, opening their general waste bin and chucking in a bag of stinking shit, freshly delivered out of the arse of his fat, lumbering, barely-able-to-breathe bulldog monstrosity. I suspect he does this every day since he walks the same route every day. Arrogant, lazy fucking cunt. Paging @erroreptile404 or his current idiot username to the main board. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 30 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said: If i had the utter misfortune to live near your council gaff, i'd put my bulldogs shite through your letter box. I think you'd quite like that and see the humour in it. Public school eh? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cunty BigBollox Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 I think you've got to be thankful for small mercies Ape. At least the cunt picked the dog shit up which is comparable to when man first stood on his legs and started walking. Unfortunately this dog Walker sounds the sort of cunt who still hasn't worked out how to pick his knuckles up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 I like to dump the dead cats I have shot in my neighbours bin, 18 to date and the silly Sod hasn’t noticed even 1, pathetic excuse for a man. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 Took my grandkids out to a local conservation area yesterday,walked the trail past the railway line and all along just off the footpaths were pile after pile of festering dog turds.Dog owners are utter fucking cunts for thinking that as their shit box had dropped its guts 2 foot from the edge of the paths its OK not to pick the shit up.Well you're all fucking cunts and I'd gladly clear it up and post it through the cunts letterboxes.Why is it Ok to leave it for kids to fucking tread in,If you want to own a smelly,yappy,hairy good for fuck all mutt then for fucks sake clear up after it you CUNTS! Dogs are cunts but not as bigger cunts as their owners Fuck off. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 7 hours ago, Ape™️ said: Been out the front of the house this morning doing a few jobs on my aged work and shopping basher car, and noticed one of my neighbours casually walking onto another neighbours property, opening their general waste bin and chucking in a bag of stinking shit, freshly delivered out of the arse of his fat, lumbering, barely-able-to-breathe bulldog monstrosity. I suspect he does this every day since he walks the same route every day. Arrogant, lazy fucking cunt. Paging @erroreptile404 or his current idiot username to the main board. If you live in such a revolting area you only have yourself to blame.... Why not retrieve some of the aforementioned dogshit and mix it with papier-mâché, mould it and fashion it into a hat for yourself.... You can wear the dogshit hat at a jaunty angle whilst singing the Volga Boatmen and exposing yourself to all and sundry on the estate.... You will be removed from your purgatory habitat in no time.... 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 18 minutes ago, Earl of Punkape said: If you live in such a revolting area you only have yourself to blame.... Why not retrieve some of the aforementioned dogshit and mix it with papier-mâché, mould it and fashion it into a hat for yourself.... You can wear the dogshit hat at a jaunty angle whilst singing the Volga Boatmen and exposing yourself to all and sundry on the estate.... You will be removed from your purgatory habitat in no time.... A typically shit post from a drunken arse bandit. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 1 hour ago, Ape™️ said: A typically shit post from a drunken arse bandit. Ape...in order for you establish a cottage industry collect all the dogshit on your estate and freeze dry it. Thread the anhydrous turds and fashion them with braid into hair extensions which you can sell to Rastafarians and supporters of BLM. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 25 minutes ago, Earl of Punkape said: Ape...in order for you establish a cottage industry collect all the dogshit on your estate and freeze dry it. Thread the anhydrous turds and fashion them with braid into hair extensions which you can sell to Rastafarians and supporters of BLM. You seem to have a wealth of knowledge when it comes to dog shit. Dog scat wanker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 5 minutes ago, Ape™️ said: You seem to have a wealth of knowledge when it comes to dog shit. Dog scat wanker. What sort of other dogs are on your estate Ape? Do they have tattoos like their owners? lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 6 minutes ago, Earl of Punkape said: What sort of other dogs are on your estate Ape? Do they have tattoos like their owners? lol. There’s one that I’ve seen who says she has a son that’s a weedy little faggot. Any relatives in Gloucestershire? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 22, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 13 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said: Been out the front of your house to fix a car, and saw someone put dog shit in a neighbours bin. Obviously, from this i gather you dont have a decent garage, and keep your car on the street. Also if you can see your neighbours waste bins, you live in a terraced shit hole. You complete and utter pleb. You’ve already quoted the OP once, so I have to assume your second attempt at a humorous response is because you’re feeling a little rattled. At least you have another faux public school fantasist to give you moral support. What an absolute pair of wankers you and @Earl of Punkape are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gronda Gronda Posted August 22, 2020 Report Share Posted August 22, 2020 1 hour ago, Ape™️ said: You’ve already quoted the OP once, so I have to assume your second attempt at a humorous response is because you’re feeling a little rattled. At least you have another faux public school fantasist to give you moral support. What an absolute pair of wankers you and @Earl of Punkape are. Punkers and JSP both live in the same flat in Whitechapel. Tower Hamlets had been good to them before the kung flu; their knock-off dvd stall had modest success: "Two for a paaahnd, ladies n gents!" These days, their income is probably supplemented through sordid PPV acts performed on the dark web via their webcam... They probably have quite a nice view of their neighbourhood holding hands on their balcony, 100 feet up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KingRollo Posted August 23, 2020 Report Share Posted August 23, 2020 10 hours ago, Gronda Gronda said: Punkers and JSP both live in the same flat in Whitechapel. Tower Hamlets had been good to them before the kung flu; their knock-off dvd stall had modest success: "Two for a paaahnd, ladies n gents!" These days, their income is probably supplemented through sordid PPV acts performed on the dark web via their webcam... They probably have quite a nice view of their neighbourhood holding hands on their balcony, 100 feet up. Do you really think a pair of squat-dwelling vagabonds can afford sufficient bandwidth for this, GG? I bet it takes them half a day to load up the CC page just to write their nonsense; I imagine they have to limit themselves to good old fashioned voyeurism and pimping each other out for thrills / supplementary income ... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted August 23, 2020 Report Share Posted August 23, 2020 10 hours ago, KingRollo said: Do you really think a pair of squat-dwelling vagabonds can afford sufficient bandwidth for this, GG? I bet it takes them half a day to load up the CC page just to write their nonsense; I imagine they have to limit themselves to good old fashioned voyeurism and pimping each other out for thrills / supplementary income ... Good evening Your Majesty. These two disgusting abominations will be taken care of early bells in the morn. I’ve instructed two fine young chaps to brick up all their windows and serve their sorry asses with a huge fine for non payment of the window tax which I’m reintroducing later this year. We mustn’t allow this sort of carry on to spread amongst the lower order. Same old story I guess. Monarchy and scum at loggerheads. Your King and leader KB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gronda Gronda Posted August 23, 2020 Report Share Posted August 23, 2020 2 hours ago, King Billy said: Good evening Your Majesty. These two disgusting abominations will be taken care of early bells in the morn. I’ve instructed two fine young chaps to brick up all their windows and serve their sorry asses with a huge fine for non payment of the window tax which I’m reintroducing later this year. We mustn’t allow this sort of carry on to spread amongst the lower order. Same old story I guess. Monarchy and scum at loggerheads. Your King and leader KB Suppose Punkers and JSP approached you looking like a Wham music video and proclaimed to be bad boys who stick together? What would be your next move? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wolfie Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 On 22/08/2020 at 15:54, Neil said: Took my grandkids out to a local conservation area yesterday,walked the trail past the railway line and all along just off the footpaths were pile after pile of festering dog turds.Dog owners are utter fucking cunts for thinking that as their shit box had dropped its guts 2 foot from the edge of the paths its OK not to pick the shit up.Well you're all fucking cunts and I'd gladly clear it up and post it through the cunts letterboxes.Why is it Ok to leave it for kids to fucking tread in,If you want to own a smelly,yappy,hairy good for fuck all mutt then for fucks sake clear up after it you CUNTS! Dogs are cunts but not as bigger cunts as their owners Fuck off. On 22/08/2020 at 09:08, Neil said: Can you send your dog round to mine,there's a lovely meal awaiting him across the road,a yappy little terrier that one day will find a size 10 boot embedded in its horrible fucking face.Dogs are cunts 'The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog' - Mark Twain, 1910. 'The more I learn about Neil, the more convinced I become that he's a fat fucking degenerative oaf whose sex-starved existence means he can't stop telling a niche online community about his chronic wanking' - Wolfie, 2020. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Cunt Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 On 22/08/2020 at 12:33, JohnnySaucePants said: Yes, we take it as a right, to keep plebs and scum such as yourself at the bottom of the heap, where you belong. 🙂 I've noticed you backtracking quite heavily JSP, after @Eric Cuntman offered you a free face-lift. Proclaiming to be 70, and living on the other side of the world. I bet you have to get up five times a night for a piss, and probably more given the last 72 hours? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 On 22/08/2020 at 10:03, Ape™️ said: Been out the front of the house this morning doing a few jobs on my aged work and shopping basher car, and noticed one of my neighbours casually walking onto another neighbours property, opening their general waste bin and chucking in a bag of stinking shit, freshly delivered out of the arse of his fat, lumbering, barely-able-to-breathe bulldog monstrosity. I suspect he does this every day since he walks the same route every day. Arrogant, lazy fucking cunt. Paging @erroreptile404 or his current idiot username to the main board. Since the social media age, dog ownership has gone through the roof. The shallow shit brained cunts who mostly inhabit the UK simply must have the latest cute dog that the their fave celeb has bought this week and features in all their blogs and tweets or whatever the fuck they get up to. The rise in extreme breeds like french bulldogs and pugs is fucking sickening- breed to look cute for total cunts yet suffer serious health problems due to this process. The rise in dog grooming, dog walking etc operations is testament to more pets dogs about. As for them shitting all over the place I totally agree with @Neilthat whenever I take my stubblets out for a walk in a local nature reserve that's easily accessible (I'm not taking them for a 10 mile hike into the wilds) its a dog turd minefield with of course the obligatory collection of shit sealed in non biodegradable plastic bags decorating the trees and bushes. Take a trowel or use a stick to launch the jobbies into the undergrowth where they wont get trodden in and wiped all over the back of my fucking car seats you selfish wankers. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 5 hours ago, Wolfie said: 'The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog' - Mark Twain, 1910. 'The more I learn about Neil, the more convinced I become that he's a fat fucking degenerative oaf whose sex-starved existence means he can't stop telling a niche online community about his chronic wanking' - Wolfie, 2020. Where did I say in my post I was wanking? Admittedly I was and the little cunt yapping nearly put me off my vinegar strokes but I didn't mention it at all,are you peeking through my curtains you fucking perv? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 5 hours ago, Wolfie said: 'The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog' - Mark Twain, 1910. This was obviously before they made bestiality illegal (at least I hope so) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 4 hours ago, JohnnySaucePants said: I'm 69 and can still claim at least a three metre projection of piss through the eye of a needle. Eric can suck my dick. You might be 69 today, but that can all change. Much like every other bit of bullshit you've back-pedalled on... oh sorry, it was all a cunning piss-take wasn't it. Nobody believes a word you fucking say Walter. If you want me to suck your dick, you'll have to provide the location of the reassignment clinic that's storing it in a jar. Near your holiday palace in Monte Carlo? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 24, 2020 Author Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 16 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said: I'd put a sizable bet on that you live in Hull or Romford. What would you like to know about New Zealand? Whats your e-mail addy? Drink bleach. I’d put a sizeable bet on you being a thick, illiterate wanker! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 20 minutes ago, Ape™️ said: I’d put a sizeable bet on you being a thick, illiterate wanker! He can't be. He was earning over a hundred quid an hour thirty years ago. What a sad little prick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted August 24, 2020 Report Share Posted August 24, 2020 41 minutes ago, JohnnySaucePants said: I'd put a sizable bet on that you live in Hull or Romford. What would you like to know about New Zealand? Whats your e-mail addy? Drink bleach. So, if I were to ask you about NZ, you would provide me with the requested info... none of which is available on Google of course. Thick fucking cunt. Look up another 7 million dollar house and try convincing us that you live in that one. The last one was a bit too, 'checkable'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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