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nocti

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Everything posted by nocti

  1. On the subject of both Tottenham and poetry, I present to you this ode to indignation. https://www.thetottenhamindependent.co.uk/news/19639676.tottenham-17-year-old-wins-foyle-young-poets-award/ I offer a screenshot of the ads beneath the article/poem without comment.
  2. Amicus meus, inimicus inimici mei.
  3. I wonder how much chutting will be in this bastardisation of Tolkien's work? Plenty if this disgruntled unfunny whale-fucker has anything to do with it. WARNING: Contains Lenny Henry. Sorry Decs. https://www.nme.com/news/tv/the-lord-of-the-rings-star-lenny-henry-promises-more-diversity-in-tv-series-3069934
  4. nocti

    Brown Sugar

    The other 80% of the gig would consist of watching the leathery old cunts trying to get back up again.
  5. It's purely to get a reaction and stir shit up, for want of a better expression. The cunts could quite easily come up with a brand new superhero, who goes into a public toilet to change into a spunk-encrusted leotard, makes all the bad guys HIV positive, and defeats his straight, white nemesis by farting a giant used condom over him; but they won't. Because sane people will rightly call it out as an absolute shower of shit whilst it fades into obscurity, except perhaps among the poofs and trannies. What they do instead is hijack current popular characters, and completely retcon a new race or arsebanditry into their backstory hoping it will find a new audience among chutters and indignant minorities, and boil the piss of the old fans of said franchise. This practically guarantees a pushback from ordinary folk, and therefore enforces the need for "awareness" and "societal changes." As you rightly said, it's best to just fuck the whole lot off and let them have it. At the risk of sounding like a morgue-cheater, 90% of new TV programmes and films are utter fucking wank anyway, whether they're as gay as a scented candle or not.
  6. I thought it was her at first too Decs, but it's some munting old "DJ" who thinks she can take a few years off her age by abbreviating her surname to an initial. This makes her claim even less likely than I originally thought, as she's as rough as a junkie's carpet. The only thing I'd expose to her is an industrial belt sander.
  7. I'm with Scotters; I'd have backscuttled it back yonder. I didn't have laminated posters of her or anything, but any port in a storm. Nowadays it'd be like rooting around for a dropped quid in a bucket of swarfega.
  8. nocti

    The Shiners

    For a second, I assumed this was to do with it being Black History Month.
  9. nocti

    Oh Dear Katie

    If they set light to a sex doll's face and fill its fanny full of haribo, he won't notice fuck all difference anyway. They could leave a device around that alternates shouts of "Harvey, please don't eat/punch/fuck that!" every five minutes, for good measure.
  10. The gormless cunt looks like someone drew a face on their cock, then pulled their foreskin up over a rubix cube. What a complete and utter fucking spastic.
  11. What fucks me off most of all is that without any kind of intervention, this dream-catching peace pipe-puffing cunt would have just his voice echoing out into the yonder. With the media diving onto it like tumescent vultures, he'll have an army of indignant do-gooding twitter wankers all fighting his corner with faux outrage, and will no doubt get his way. Not that I give much of a fuck what happens in Blackpool of all places, anyway. Dances with Dicks can pack up his wigwam and fuck off somewhere else, regardless. How's that for a caricature you feather-donned fuckwit?
  12. Be sure to CC me in when you finally get round to finishing your manifesto, Baws. The crumbs you've been dropping so far sound right up my street.
  13. A worthy contender indeed, although the plastic equine cunt is partly responsible for the woke-wave ripping through the comedy climate over here, the priggish fucking canuck. I'd give her a Simon Weston makeover with a blowtorch, then thump a breezeblock up her shitter.
  14. With all the absurd events that have occurred in the world, this is bizarrely one of my favourite things to have ever happened. It always cracks me up when I think about it, the fucking stupid cunt. If I end up with alzheimers, I hope it's one of the last remaining memories I'm left with. At least then I can chuckle away when I'm wondering who the fuck my wife and kids are.
  15. How is the job at Dulux going, Neil?
  16. What gets me is that it's just the same sports but with amputees and belmers doing them. They could at least come up with new and interesting shit to make them do. I propose a 100m walk for the ones with Parkinsons. Start the rattlers off with a breadboard in their hands, put a load of marbles on them, and see how many they've still got on there at the finish line. I'd fucking watch that.
  17. A katana-wielding My Little Pony enthusiast, a shite talking sheep, and a thunder-cocked hermaphrodite trainspotter notwithstanding, he was one of the oddest little cunts to grace the Corner. In my tenure here at least. Also, RIP Grumpycunt.
  18. "Shall we go over there and screw those kids?" "Out of what?"
  19. Clueless ginger fuckwit, from the Sophie Ellis-Bextor school of having a face that looks like that thing from Ice Age clinging to a kite. If she cares that much, she should take a leaf out of our Miles' book and fuck off over there. Although I do admire her gaul in apologising for her foolishness, by way of posting links so those she offended can donate their money to charities she has chosen. What a cunt.
  20. Looking at the cunt, and knowing his name is Miles, I doubt he could handle more than a pint anyway. Especially when they cut his fucking hands off.
  21. It's pearls of wisdom like this that make me wonder why your parenting blog was taken down.
  22. Oh, fucking great. They won't even need the dinghies soon.
  23. I wonder what the religious types would make of this recent development. https://www.lawofficer.com/george-floyd-mural-destroyed-by-lightning-strike/
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