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Eric Cuntman

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Everything posted by Eric Cuntman

  1. I would definitely do lezzing with either of them.
  2. He won’t like being referred to as the third power.
  3. I’d have fucked Ruth Langsford a few years ago.
  4. How on earth were you expecting her to find the exact bit of beach? Did you leave a sand castle with a little Haitian bongo-bongo flag somewhere clear of the high tide mark?
  5. I would suggest top-decking his lavatory cistern but they haven’t got plumbing in Cyprus.
  6. Good lad ELC. Keep on swinging and take no shit from anyone. I dread to think of the abuse I would face if this lot ever found out that I was a transsexual Somali quadriplegic with herpees* *bring back Punkape.
  7. They won’t be raughing when you turn up in the Lascal with the lape mattress in the back.
  8. Sorry. Couldn’t fucking resist.
  9. Can you grant me permission to edit this please?
  10. Did you stand too close to the window in the radiology suite?
  11. I know. But I’m not American. Don’t encourage it. Correct it.
  12. “There’s a nasty nip in the air.” - Weather report from Pearl Harbour Dec 7th 1941.
  13. I fucking despise the millennial generation. Since when did ‘working in a cafe’ start being described as being a ‘Barista’? They have to have everything they want because the internet tells them that they, and they alone are the most important thing in the universe bar none. As soon as they turn 17, their parents buy them a Nissan Cumquat with 36 airbags, a 6 foot crumple zone at either end and a computer which calls the police if any white heterosexual men approach the vehicle. The upshot is that the deliberately dumbed down education system has produced a generation of low IQ drones that only have the capacity to focus on their own personal gratification.
  14. You do know that you’re fucked in the head?
  15. I hated that bit. Hank’s death left a bad taste too.
  16. Never take the name of Mike Ehrmantraut in vain again. In a world of steroid pumped poseurs and Hollywood hardmen, he’s the only one who rang true with me. Pimento cheese sandwich?
  17. The Spy Who Raped Me Dr No Means Yes A Quantum Of Gollies The Man With The Golden Teeth
  18. Total shite. Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Princess Di, Jill Dando. All attractive, all fucking dead.
  19. @Cap'n Cunt is a model of diplomacy. He’s been here for ever, but visits rarely. He’s probably the best on here.
  20. ‘Did Kate Middleton catch the cancer off of Prince Charles?’
  21. @Frank’s boat is a Sloopy.
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