scotty

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

even although

Blimey.

1 minute ago, ProfB said:

🙁 was a mistake for me to return.

👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

PS 👍

3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Eco-spade! I like that. I'd like to use that at my next dinner party 

I'm stealing that as well, Gypps. 👍👍👍

Meaghen Be Knighted ?n

Does illiteracy run in your hermaphroditic unipedal family?

Cretin.

21 minutes ago, Snowy said:

What really boggles my mind is people actually reply to this boring droan of a human( i use that term losely) .

When ever the dreary fucking idiot mentions my name ,or replys to me I just ignore her/him because any effort is useless ,its a witless boring worm who posts shit over and over again,dreary fucking unimaginative troglodyte.

Quite, Snowy. In fact the only poster seemingly oblivious to your indisputably accurate assessment is Pen himself. Personally, I suspect that s/he masochistically enjoys any sort of attention, no matter how abusive it is.

Fuck off.

Jools Holland, now. Someone enlighten me because I'm sure I'm not imagining this...

Is Andy Fairweather-Lowe actually doing a Ricky Gervais style mong impression?

Jonathan Woss has already ticked two of the required television boxes. Ten minutes in, and we've already had the fat black unfunny comedienne, now we're onto the token unfunny homo (category/male.)

We have the black male comedian waiting in the wings, but I'm wondering whether they've managed to locate a transgender comic at this short notice. If they have failed in this endeavour, a stiff letter to the Times will of course be forthcoming from the @scotty  office complaining about the appalling lack of diversity. 👍👍

1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I can’t fucking believe they missed the fact that you were just word playing anyway. If we were drunk, we’d be like that.

Eric, I've honestly been expecting my definition of "ganache" to be challenged. I'd even prepared to point out that actually gouache is a Hungarian stew. 

I despair sometimes. 😒

32 minutes ago, Eddie said:

A boys best friend is his mother

You've been watching Xhamster again Eddie, haven't you.

5 hours ago, Arnold said:

Ganache is a type of chocolate cream, Scotty. Panache is the art of getting things wrong with flair.

Nonsense. Ganache is a type of painting.

9 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said:

with a panache for Bedford vans,

I think you mean a penchant, Scrotes. Panache is a type of chocolate cream.

1 hour ago, ratcum said:

brown action?

Fuck me you're a bit of a progressive aren't you? 👺

How about  Vivienne Westwood then? She's still fresh, and she was fond of using swastikas during her bondage period on Carnaby Street.

24 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

I doubt they will be genuinely surprised to be told they’ve got cancer. 

Let's hope they have a good sense of tumour.

11 minutes ago, ratcum said:

Alright Sprotters? I'm thinking of doing some necro action on a celeb who died in 2022. Want to join me?

You might at least wait until the lid's on Pelè's coffin Rat. 

On 24/12/2022 at 15:30, Cuntybaws said:

 

 

Eddie "Tenpole" Tudor? 🤔

1 hour ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

Clarkson is still a bloke though and I bet if Meghan spread her negroid hairy clam he would stuff it like a turkey.

I think I'd take that wager. 🤔

1 hour ago, Mike Hunt said:

There's a cunt there with a truly wicked sense of humour, who got fed up boring his patients with Merry Christmas texts, so he thought it would be more interesting for them to read a text saying they have incurable lung cancer instead.  This is a quite unique level of cuntishness to me.

https://amp.lbc.co.uk/news/gp-accidentally-send-patients-text-lung-cancer-merry-christmas/h

 

I wonder if any of them saw the bad news, thought "oh fuck it, I'm not going through that" and promptly overdosed? Rather like the bloke who got pranked at his own wedding reception by his mates kidding him he'd won the lottery jackpot, whereupon he loudly and gleefully informed his new bride that he loathed her and was eloping with her sister now that he had sufficient funds. How they chuckled.

14 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

Bloody hell mate  it's going to be tough hitting your sweet spot.

"I joined the BNP but I don't like the racism"

"You know about Jesus being God's son, dying for our sins and then coming back to life? Well, that's the part I have trouble with."

Father Dougal McGuire.

1 hour ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

You're clearly not a real frog if you use mouthwash.

You are if you mix it with absinthe.

2 minutes ago, Neil said:

she'd get a portion if she asked nicely enough though.

I feel sure she's right on the verge of calling you, Neil. 👍👍

1 hour ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

Not the sort of Bird you think will meet it's maker over the Christmas period but, John Bird.

He was pure quality. Especially the TV version of Absolute Power.

On 25/12/2022 at 11:57, Arnold said:

the vicar was un-white.

I'd like to think it was this guy, Arnold.

https://youtu.be/woAFfMOakcQ

8 hours ago, Eddie said:

Black culture is in general a crass, aggressive, violent and tribal existence

It's also the least appropriate use of the word "culture" I can recall hearing.

22 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I still don't think this cunt is a bona fide shit stabber. I still think that it's all a ruse because ITV was gonna fuck him off so he "came out" knowing that there was no way he was going to get the bullet after anouncing he was a sausage blower. How come his Mrs is still with him? 

Load of ole bollocks 

He's been fucking a young gofer at the studios for years. He either got tired of the gofer, or his wife told him to bin the gofer off. The gofer got upset at being binned off and threatened to out him so he jumped before he was pushed. Private Eye have had the story for some time.