Jiggerycock

55 minutes ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

I see ITV have gone all Beeb with a gaggle of vulva chewers waxing lyrical about a game that they have precisely zero knowledge of. Our mate, Emma Hayes was bouncing up and down at the end, rubbing her cock against Ian Wright’s leg…he should have thrown the head on the clueless skanky sausage-dodging rip. I want her dead.

Never mind all that  - (What) Sam Matterface (hey, godda no respect, hey!) delivered the biggest pile of shite since the ringmaster spiked Dumbo with Exlax.

One minute he was all Henry V and Shakespearian, the next it was telling us all how we all felt, the next it was an aircraft journey with turbulence we were all on.

ITV were a bloody shambles last night.

24 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

I imagine there was no fun allowed on your ward Matron, before you scurried off to primary care for such luxuries as a padded office chair and weekends off. No, I imagine you ran a very tight ship indeed with all those brave boys from the Light Brigade needing vigorous hand relief between bed baths and leeches. And given your family connections there’d be no lead on the roof, either. 

Give your colleagues a break, will you?

Yeah - it wasn't all wall-to-wall shelling, starvation rations and 'no sleep 'til Hammersmith' when Malta was awarded the George Cross for standing firm against the Nazi's in WW2.

I imagine they had no end of laughs in the Bajtra shabeens, watching the smuggled George Raft movies

I mean if it was about faux-working-class wannabee geezah Keith Allen fronting ANYTHING to do with football then they'd have a point.

It had to happen didn't it?

Now that this monolith to inefficiency, criminality and poor clinical outcomes has been raised to the level of our new national deity (it sitteth at the right hand of our Lord God David Attenborough), it's logical to give it the  highest award bestowed by the British government “for acts of the greatest heroism or for most conspicuous courage in circumstance of extreme danger”.

I think the George Cross would perhaps be better awarded to those who gave their lives (e.g. the actual cancer patients whose treatment was delayed and the thousands of suicides caused by us locking down) so that the NHS was protected. No one will I guess be banging a pan on a Thursday night for those souls.

Still - easier to make a mockery of an award for genuine sacrifice (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dudley_Mason) than give frontline workers a meaningful pay rise.

48 minutes ago, ProfB said:

WHY are the male corner members fearful of posting on my nom 14 hours later?

Even Baws has gone quiet. 🤐 

A fear of getting your willy bitten? Fear of snakes?

This would never, ever happen to a female, as we check the toilet first for a snake or snakes even.

Love ProfB xxx

If I wanted to read what sounds like the deranged witterings from a teenage girl's diary I'd start with the lyrics of 'Imagine'

Fabulous result last night - the adventure continues.

And you know what makes this England journey so much more enjoyable - it's the knowledge that our Scottish, Welsh and Irish brothers and sisters are with us every step of the way, cheering us on and rejoicing in our British commonality. OK, their journeys may be over but their hopes live on with England - take comfort guys, the English lads will do everything they can to make us ALL proud.

1 hour ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Ordinarily I'd agree with you but the standard of the premiership, particularly last year has been piss poor. Do a deal with Man City; 90m for Kane and we get Stirling and Laporte as well. Buy Lamptey from Brighton, a back up striker and the Austrian midfielder Sabitzer and we'll get top 5. Otherwise 8th. Pointless keeping Kane for another season.

How'd you think Norwich will do? Do reckon Gilmour will make a difference?

One game where superannuated thug Graeme Souness thought he was man of the match, despite the evidence of everyone else's eyes, and the cunt is now lauded as the bastard love child of Franz Beckenbauer and Glenn Hoddle.

Here's a wager for you - Gilmour will be the subject of a sub-£10m bid from Fenerbache in 2 seasons time.......either them or Malmo

18 minutes ago, Ape™️ said:

Is chaotic neutral some dungeons and dragons character type? 

......or the next in the 'LBGTQ' alphabetti spaghetti?

Never thought that I would be wishing for early England injuries so that better players could come onto the pitch. There's something I find quite dark and sociopathic about Southgate. Perhaps this is his payback for his 96 treatment. Condemning us to another dour nail biting 70 minutes of backwards-and-sideways, in the vain hope that Kane might burst into a trot, before bringing Grealish on to go forwards.

Basically, two bang-average sides, waiting to see who burst into tears first, with home advantage proving the decider.

Unfortunately for Europe, that scenario will be revisited if (The) England get past The Ukraine on Saturday, in the semi-final and, God help us lets get carried away why not, final.

Anyway, I've discovered the new meaning of 'To get Mullered' so, hooray for experience

Symptomatic of Labour and politics in general in the UK right now.

People will often put up with being ruled by people who cheat them, or lie to them, or who mismanage the country — as recent polls illustrate.

But they won’t put up with being ruled by those who openly despise them.

She looks like Martin Keown

One the one hand we've got the effeminate idiocracy so efficiently skewered in the OP

On the other we've got a blood-relative of La Spears who makes Machiavelli look a rank amateur.

Can't we just wrap the whole grim affair in a lead-lined box and dump it in the Mariana Trench?

Yeah move on.....forget it....worse things happen at sea......another chorus of 'Imagine' everyone.

Bunch of fucking government shills!

On 17/06/2021 at 19:36, King Billy said:

Windy Mueller, a well known Nazi if I’m not mistaken.

Windy Miller, Windy Miller - sharper than a thorn

Windy Miller, Windy Miller - selling kiddie porn

Country and Western?

Hell yeah!!

Four of its greatest exponents but when Johnny Cash comes in, this just takes off. His voice is definitely from another, darker place.

Works for me

Wannabee by The Spice Girls

Apparently the epitome....the motherlode.....the aspirational top trumps is to 'zigahzigahhh'

12 hours ago, King Billy said:

Meghan Rapino the slush puppy haired, lesbian, SJW captain of the USA wimmins World Cup winning ‘soccer’ team who’s been whining on for the last couple of years how wimmins soccer players must be paid equally to men, because they’re just as good as the evil patriarchal males has dropped that line of argument recently for some unexplained reason. Shortly after her team of lezzer man beasts were thrashed by a team of 15 year old Male high school players to be precise.

She decided to devote her energies to more important issues and last week was all over the media promoting lingerie chain ‘Victoria’s Secrets’ new agenda. 

Their new boss suddenly sacked their ‘Angels’, a group of well fuckable models and announced that the company had ‘for too long concentrated on what men want and would now be concentrating on what women want.’ Fat lezzers, trannies with stubble, and mincing poofs with worn out arseholes apparently is the new business model.

Unfortunately Ms Rapino who for years has been savage on twitter cancelling her perceived enemies for the slightest wrong comment, no matter how far back in history has now had some long deleted twitter posts in which she mocks Asians come to light. The mob are now baying for her blood LOL 

Ditto Billy Eilish another goddess of the millennial SJW cult, never shy to shout her gob off about Trump and others and bask in the glory from the morons who adore her. Sorry adored, past tense as exactly the same thing has happened to this piece of shit today too. Racist twitter posts from the past surfacing. Oh dear.

Don't worry girls. Wash that fucking Koolade out of your hair and shut the fuck up. No one is going to know who the fuck you are, you pair of insignificant, talentless  little slags.

It's just hilarious watching cancel culture eat itself - there's entropy for you, right there.

A night on the tins and a few ribald tweets (you're a cunt for even having a Twitter account BTW) back in 2010? You're toast now mate, in fact, and this is an absolute truth, Gareth Southgate is a big fan of that White Supremacist Winston Churchill and has gone on record saying as much, so why the hell is he still in charge of anything more than his own excretory functions? 

Not because 'she's a woman in a man's world', since all football commentators are at best disposable and at worst, machine-gunable.

No, it's her accent, which makes what she's actually crapping on about unlistenable. Basically, it's so bucolic it makes The Wurzels sound like Brian Sewell, the listener trying to get past her mangled vowels, to find out whether it's a corner, a birdie, a drop goal or the one after Bechers Brook she's describing.

The BBC seem to go in for this kind of strafed dialect in its reporters. I'm thinking that mid-Atlantic drawl of Lyce Doucett, in fact when Brendan Rogers packs up managing Leicester City, I'm pretty sure there's a job there for him based on his unfathomable burr alone.

Fucking hell, Gareth Chilcott's gone even further downhill now hasn't he?

To quote another black guy that got a shoeing of LA's finest 'Can't we all just get along?'

Antifa go at Winston Churchill's statue. Knuckle-draggers act the maggot about George Floyd's.

We've got to boycott any brand that the laughably-named 'Hope Not Hate' umm, hates, often on the flimsiest of pretexts, but now we are being implored to buy those brands in an anti-anti-racist gesture of solidarity, whilst booing (or cheering) the England Football Team.

Back in the day, you had to kill Blair Peach to be a certified neo-Nazi.

Now it's if you whistle the national anthem.

Southgate knows he's driven this one right down a cul-de-sac, with no feasible endgame ('The FA declares the war on racism has been won, therefore England players will no longer kneel down before games'. I don't bloody, flipping-well think so!).

Therefore the only reverse-ferret possible is to make the gesture so perfunctory as for it to be negligible, in fact it'll be a curtsey when we play the Czechs on Tuesday - about right for the bunch of girls we've got representing us.

2 hours ago, Neil said:

As soon as someone puts something on thats half decent you go and put shit like this on, I came round a bit with your Christopher Cross but I still think this cover is better(and from the 90's) try it, you never know you might like it. Oink!

 

Saxon did a metal version of 'Ride Like The Wind' - which was okay but the video was shit

This is all balls!!

No nips! No clits and piss-flaps!! No cucumbers and money shots!!

It's the fucking lies I can't stand!

On 14/05/2021 at 17:47, Jiggerycock said:

Well, he's only gone and Pootered into the top job in the political wing of Evangelical Protestantism!

He really is a tin-foil hat merchant.

Luckily, he’ll gaffe himself out of the job by Christmas, otherwise, the DUP will join Labour and we’ll be writing obituaries for both parties.

I was at Ascot yesterday and undertook my piss-poorest day of punting ever. Three bets and I think they beat a combined total of five other horses home.

I just wish I could have been as prescient as the above - always the bloody same when there's money riding on it.

This.....this.....this..... pint-sized fucker has been getting on my tits since forever - well, specifically, 1992 when he cried like the baby Jesus on the winners podium,  after steering the Searle brothers in the GB coxed pair to Olympic Gold in Barcelona.

Not content with acting like a prize petunia on one of the biggest of international stages, he continues to steal a living by phoning in the same commentary for every rowing race, using a random phrase generator, viz

"Get out from the start quickly....dictate the pace of the race.....settle through the middle one thousand metres....taking the stroke rate up....25 strokes left....one last effort"

I'm amazed James Cracknell doesn't twat him into the middle of the next Olympiad.

Oh and as for calling us 'Grayd Briddun', I mean WT actual F?

You sound like a superannuated DJ on Local Radio Gold, who thinks music ended with 'Radar Love'