Rev

Anyway you bunch of maudlin cunts, 'do not go gently into that good night - fuck it up the arse with a party hat on'There's still good music out there. There's always going to be a 33/1 winner to be backed and whilst all this 'live each day as if it was your last' platitudes leaves me cold, just lively yourself up a bit and get living.

Exactly, jiggs. Life's too fucking short for cunts to display gushing sentimentality, when we have on offer such wonders as hammer-drills, diesel space heaters, fire-arms and bondage-wear.

Bronski's come off the doughnuts and made a couple of videos to woo the ladies. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y8Ii5l23QXM http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MM0XHJS3GgM

I love burritos

Gram Parsons was a cunt.

We've got a case of wine getting delivered to Coitus Heights today. You know you're turning into an old cunt when the booze comes by courier. Deedum, fuck 'em..no sense in pondering over it, people choose their own paths. If it conflicts with the way you would have it, you don't need it. Drop him. However, most of us Glaswegians have a certain exuberance that isn't everyone's cup of pish. It's the Buckfast in our blood.

I always fucking knew football was for homosexualists. That cunt behind the gibbon in the ill-fitting brown suit is about to hold onto the primate's ears and give him a damn good rogering right up his festering and doubtlessly flabby dung hatch. Hardly any justification needed at all, really, they're all screaming fucking benders. And cunts.

This fucking Munchkin-voiced bastard needs a good fucking kicking, his face re-assembled with a diesel rotovator, then set on fire. Didn't he once claim to be Richard Burton's god-son? The best thing about him is that he's fat, forgotten and will probably die prematurely. Total cunt.

Make no mistake, Decimus; jugs is a special Olympic cunt alright.

I experimented with madras paste, fucking lentils, onion, garlic, some left over Quorn and made my own Naans last night. Smelt lovely, tasted like fucking lava. I ended up eating crisps and chocolate digestives. I am still awaiting the bastard inferno to rocket out of my arse.

There's a picture of me as a young cunt online somewhere, along with a couple of other unsavoury looking bastards. If I was a woman right now looking at it, I'd fuck me. Bushy sideburns, medallion, poncey footwear? Judge, are you John McCririck?

Bronski...climb off your step-mum and sing us a song.

I say fucking thank you to any cunt pushing 300 who doesn't show up at the hotel pool. When the fuck did it become socially acceptable and show up in public not in a conservative one-piece bathing suit but in a Brazilian porn worthy two piece bikini?  I get the fact that you’re comfortable with your body but ffs I’m not!  Put on one of those 60’s tutu style swimsuits!

But..but, it was a present and fits me snugly.

The only problem I can see with your suggestion Rev, is that it would take many months before the flames went out. Blubber, is highly flammable.

You're right, jizzley. No rush though, surely. I'd be quite happy to watch him scream himself unconscious, as the searing heat consumed him bit by bit.

Wouldn't it be easier (and probably more entertaining) just to nail him to the floor-boards and set him alight?

I'd slather some Canesten on them anyway...just in case.

Didn't this cunt OD on jacket spuds?

I'll be wearing me M & S swimsuit - with pleated skirt, I don't run about with me baps hanging out.

Why not?

Young cunts today, eh, grumpers. They have no respect for us elder statesmen of the Corner. Fucking bastards.

I think you've got them in the bag, Bronski. You might want to wear some decorative nipple-tassels to attract the MILFs..just a thought.

Sounds to me like she's deceived you. It was probably her twin brother's refrigerated semen. Was his name Keith, by any chance?

Plain bio-live yoghurt, ease the symptoms of thrush
 
This site gets more medical by the minute.

Condoms work just as well, or even asking her to give her yeast-cake a good scrub up pre-shag. Marmite's a cunt.

Surely he's just having a plushie rub-off night with his fucking fedora homo buddies..either that, or his step-mum's taken the night off working the town's red-light district and is helping him braid his arse-hairs, to match the malodorous dreadlocks he's got dangling from his shrivelled clackerbag.

Obviously, I hadn't a bastarding clue who this cunt is, as I'm not a follower of fucking football...it's been proven time and time again to be a game for screaming homosexualists and Special Olympic chutters. Why don't they just replace her with Judy Finnegan as their fuck-mascot? It's not fucking rocket science.

Who gives a flying shit what Judy Fucking Finnegan has to say? Are we to set precedents because of what that nasty old sow considers to be valid social commentary? Fuck her. Fuck Tom Daley. And fuck Alex Salmond. Cunts.

Why don't you learn to play guitar, or find a woman to have sex with, without them being related to you, or needing paid, Bronski? Don't be a cunt-blister all your life.

Roger Daltrey's still a cunt.