southerncunt

What is it with these fucking yanks? How many times does this have to happen before some cunt in power over there finally admits the ridiculousness of the gun laws?

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against guns. I’m a licensed shooter and have a few myself.

I have never felt the urge to go and shoot up the place however. Perhaps because I have no use for (and rightly no access in this country to) automatic weapons with large mags and high fire rates?

Its insanity, and it’s always the kids who suffer. 

20 minutes ago, Decimus said:

We did briefly look into Canada a while back before our youngest was born, at heart though I've never been one to take risks or be adventurous. 

Politically I'm not a red faced gammon, but at heart I'm a provincial little Englander. I genuinely couldn't imagine living anywhere but Norfolk, it's not perfect but it's my home. I don't like where the country is heading, but as an inveterate pessimist and cynic, I'd soon find fault in any other nation I laid my hat in.

The Decimus clan is in it to the end, unless of course the Greens ever get voted in.

Your Simon Sebag Montefiore book cover aside, there are beers in the fridge for you here in Melbourne. Canadians are too polite and reserved for you. They are only warming up when pissed, us aussies are primed from the get go. You’d fit in far better here.

I’m not a proud man by any stretch, and would root most of the female kind. 
 

Except that.

Fucking hell, I’d move on to the animal kingdom before that. 

4 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

He's 55 in this picture.

The prosecution rests.

What a twat. 

On 23/04/2022 at 03:13, Jake The Muss said:

There cums a time when you get to a said age and have to except that you're not going to have the amount of rumping you once had, as an ageing cunt i can still fuck with the best but even i have to admit that i have to be satisfied with only three times a day and not the regular ten times a day that i was once used to, some of you are still virgins well in to your 40's+.. Jake's advice is to you virgins is get out of your piss stained bedsit, put your games consul away and get rid of your vintage wank sock and get amonst it before it's too late for you.

Debate..

This is a serious topic, so NO derailing or you will be claw hammered to a pulp.

Thanks in advance from the Muss Management.

So you’re saying you can only manage 3 wanks a day at your advanced age? 
 

That still places you well in front of the pack as the biggest wanker on here, by at least 2 wanks a day.

14 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

Does "bash" mean something different in Oz?

No. It’s universal but I should have suffixed “up”.

1 minute ago, Jake The Muss said:

Every member ?

Name them ?

I’ll nominate, for a start.

Fucking cocksucker.

Get on a plane and come and bash me, big man. Thick fucking idiot.

7 hours ago, Jake The Muss said:

You take things too serious you over cooked under done cunt, if i met you face to face, i would smash your head flat using only my cock.

Keep sucking on D's third nipple, you webbed footed wannabe brain dead no personality dullard.

Ooooohhhhh, I’m pissing my pants.

How fucking old are you? Dickhead.

Had a Ford XR6 Turbo ute with 295 rwkw as my work car for 2 years. Always wanted one, and hard work made it possible. I fucking loved it, wish I still had it. Funny thing is that power output is only a very mild tweak from standard, and it’s still scary fast. Barra the world…

First car was a Triumph 2000. Still have it, and I’m nearly 50. Bought it when I was 16. It has aged better than I have, but that’s not saying much. 

10 hours ago, nocti said:

Before you settle down to watch your streams, make sure to pull the blinds down. 

https://www.google.com/maps/@50.9012756,-4.3849378,0a,48.6y,51.4h,73.69t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1syL56j9fEzy-gyTcX3RwchQ!2e0

Might be pay per view. Looks like his wallet isn’t the only thing he’s got out and ready to administer a beating to. 
 

Looks like a lovely little English town, apart from the odd wanker of course.

16 hours ago, Decimus said:

I do, Ed. It looked like the murder kit of the world's worst serial killer. Two or three tiny fruit knives rusted to fuck and a Fisher Price hammer. If I recall Eric was disgusted at his piss fucking poor efforts.

I suppose a mentally deficient painter and decorator who can only count to five was never going to own a hoard of sophisticated weaponry, but fuck me, he may as well have tried to "impress" you with a filed down bookies pen.

What a complete and utter fucking div.

@Jake The Muss what have you got to say for yourself, you safety-scissor wielding, nappy wearing, absolute fucking retard?

 

I remember that photo. What a fucking spastic, and a hard up one at that. I’ve seen better arsenals in an Action Man collection, and they’re fucking plastic.

Fucking two digit IQ wannabe hard man cocksucker. 

I’m tipping you must be referring to Jake. 
 

I would hope. He is a one trick wannabe Temuera. 
 

I am fleeting, simpleton is open to debate.

1 hour ago, Ape™️ said:

Why am I at the bottom of the fucking list, bellsniff?

The racist cunt didn’t even include me. Being gay probably ain’t so bad.

On 05/02/2022 at 11:11, Stubby Pecker said:

Indeed 

Jardine was a complete cunt and as England cricket captain stuck one right up the arseholes of those Aussie dogs on the ‘body line’ tour down under in 32-33. The convicts still fucking moan about it to this day.

Good fucking god man, for a moment I thought you were implying frank rented out what’s left of ming to paying punters. Niche 

Harold Larwood actually moved out here, and by all accounts was a well liked bloke, despite being Jardines main weapon. Jardine however, was the distilled version of everything we hate about you cunts. 

When you have a large population of ideologically restrained intellectual mice this is the Darwinian conclusion. These Stone Age cunts will rapidly deplete any that oppose or can possibly improve the situation. The 21st century cab has pulled up. No room for these cunts.

12 hours ago, DCI Jean Cunt said:

You don't know the worst of it Eric! During the time she was away she met this wanker, got married to him and now has two kids by him. But I'm still fantasising about what things could have been like, but maybe it's too late. Or maybe she'll divorce him.

Scruff??

It’s right up there in the blood pressure rising stakes with “I know, right?”

Cunts.

1 minute ago, cunt said:

I don't know, do they have windows in Wuhan market?

Just fuck off and die, you sadist cunt.

9 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Hey Southern, have you see that vid that's doing the rounds? Jimmy Anderson, Joe Root, Nathan Lyon and a couple of other Aussies enjoying a beer after one of the games, on their hotel roof bar, that's being broken up by some aussie pigs? One of the players records it and says "for the lawyers".  Not sure what test match it was. The aussie filth are out of control. 

Yeah fucked if I know. That’s tassie though, they’re different down there!

7 hours ago, Keith Lard said:

Hit all my targets at the office this morning, now heading for a crafty celebratory wank over the glass topped photocopier. The Xerox warms my sperm nicely. I secretly hope Mavis catches me though. 

If you are the real Brony, you’ve mellowed.

Any beer brewed under license is fucking piss by definition. It happens a fair bit over here due to the distance but there is still good stuff to be had from independent bottle shops who import in chilled containers.

Fullers is fucking hard to get here, and I love that shit.

Unfortunately you only get a shadow of what we make here. Very few drink Fosters, but it’s actually pretty decent when fresh. The craft scene here is fucking huge now, and has caught up with the rest of the world if you like big hop driven beers. 
We can’t compete with the krauts or Austrians in the lager stakes though. Trumer Pils is absolute nectar, and for summer, Menebrea isn’t far behind.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, you fucking twat.

18 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

You usually find the Aussies will have one bad game in a series and that's where you have to take them. England fucked it and missed the opportunity. So Australia to win next test by an innings and several hundred runs. 

Btw: does the ball swing more in Hobart?

Not sure, it’s a pink ball in a 5 day (hopefully) test at an oval that is hosting the Ashes for the first time because the xenophobic cunts in WA want to remain a fortress. Personally I’m glad it’s in Hobart. Beautiful city, and that’s coming from a Victorian. 
I’m disappointed England was unable to put up more of a fight. 

On 09/01/2022 at 07:10, Stubby Pecker said:

Each to their own major. Perhaps I, like millions of other, just like torturing myself over false hope that we’ll get one over on the Aussie cunts

I watched it as it happened, and only the long game can produce suspense like that. Anderson and Broad hung on gamely, and of the whole English side, those two deserved to be there at the end. 

He’s a fucking cunt of the highest order. Absolute shitcunt of a human. He can go and fuck himself with the rough end of a pineapple. They are launching a legal bid to fight his deportation so the cunt wants to clog up the courts now. Fuck off and die you bombchucking arsehole.