Cap'n Cunt

Buses are for poor people. Anyone with an ounce of self respect and decency would buy a car. Or buy their own bus, and not let spazzers or chavs on it. Or buy their own bus, fill it with spazzers and chavs and then set it on fire.

So a bunch of 'mostly Senegalese' chancers got on a boat in Libya to seek fame, fortune and benefits in Europe. 3 days later, they arrived in Italy, or so they thought. Strange, though, that everyone there spoke Libyan (or whatever system of grunts and gestures passes for language there). Surprise surprise, they're not in Italy at all, they've spent three days sailing 40 miles along the Libyan coast. And to top that: "several people had jumped from the boat but were unable to swim and drowned". These (can I say 'sandmonkeys' here, or will I get told off?) 'people' obviously have a different upbringing to be, cos my old mum always said 'If you can't swim, don't jump out of a boat", a lesson that has served me well throughout my ongoing existence.

I'll have a pound each way on Elton John. But I fucking hope it's Bonio out of U2.

You're the gay reincarnation of Leslie Newson.

I think it's semi-literate, rather than semi-illiterate. But I have no wish to try to educate you. Others have obviously tried in the past and failed miserably.

Removed

Ah. That's what that 'search' thing is for, then. I'll shut up and fuck off.

The current format for TV shows appears to be a three-minute 'what's coming up on tonight's show', which shows all the best bits, then ten minutes of shite with only a modicum of the aforementioned 'best bits' included. Then another selection of 'what's coming up', featuring the best bits that weren't previously shown. Then the fucking advertising break, following which there's a recap of the first half of the show, in case you're the type of mong that can't remember what you saw two minutes ago, then another ten minutes of shite. I'm all for social inclusion (apart from Deleted, bummers and vegans) but ADHD isn't actually a thing. It's one of them fucking made-up illnesses like dyslexia, which is an anagram of 'thick cunt'.