Major Cunt

33 minutes ago, Decimus said:

It's a shame that The Judge isn't that stealthy.

I can picture him now, drunkenly swerving the scooter down the One-Stop beers, wines and spirits aisle, knocking over old dears and plinths of Dubonnet on his way to the Spesh. Next thing you know he's wailing like a member of his tribe at The Wall, shit running down his cankles as the realisation hits him that the discounted 5kg bags of pork scratchings aren't kosher.

Now that's just cracked me up! 

I've absolutely no idea what his connection to Cowell is apart from them being responsible for pushing talent devoid,  utterly cuntish pop acts on the public, forcing bands that actually wrote and played their own instruments struggling to get signed. 

You would have thought that King had enough dough put away to pay his own bail, but was possibly attempting to claim poverty knowing that the filthy fucking nonces victims would be rightly awarded his millions, or maybe all those Southeast Asia holidays with Glitter were not that cheap after all. 

What's the Corners consensus regarding the Cowell connection? 

20 hours ago, King Billy said:

You’ll never look back.

He normally doesn't unless he's checking for store detectives whilst shoplifting white spirit's. When it comes to procuring alcohol Drew's as cunning as a Afghan warlord after a new tea boy.

15 hours ago, judgetwi said:

There’s Marjorie. No balls, no bollocks, never had an independent thought in his little head. So desperate to be liked by wankers he’s never met and never will. The king of the cliches.

Do carry on.👌🏾

Not too fussed who likes me here and who doesn't, Jewdith. I was simply offering a piece of advice that might help you out along with the obligatory piss taking.

If forced to wager on the punter most likely to take this place as reality then it's a score on yourself. I'm not sure if it's the copious amounts of Kalashnikov vodka or lack of human contact causing your hilarious rage, but i'm not a shrink. Maybe Roops did a degree in psychology along with her others.

i'm more than happy to take you out for a spin in the wheelchair coz that's the kind of bloke I am.

Chill the fuck out, and Shalom!

1 hour ago, Decimus said:

Yorkshire, you say? 

Now I may have smoked more weed than was good for me this past week, but I'm starting to join up the dots.

Gobbie was Ding, wasted on amitriptyline and wearing his mother's dress. I can't recall them ever being logged on at the same time.

 

I'm just wondering how many clunge starved punters sent dick pics via PM.

Her absence could potentially be explained due to receiving a snap of Lord P`s Burmese Python. Even a slapper from Leeds who's knocked out eight kids of various shades would undoubtedly shudder and call it a day upon sight. 

3 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

They actually bother with education courses in category A prisons. It must be great fun teaching maths to mad-dog fucking loonies...

"If it takes a man 26 minutes to chop up an old lady, how long does it take the same man to fuck a rabbit?"

I was listening to a podcast with a bloke who was either double or triple A cat. It was just him Kenny Noye and Mickey Steele on this special unit. Despite being held behind electronic triple gates and cameras in their cells they were awoken by a torch shined in the face every half hour during the night. 

Really interesting fella who was dealing directly with the Cali Cartel, Moroccan Mafia and others. He had previously escaped from a Dutch and an English jail while being taken to court and they gave him twenty odd years in his absence. 

Noye actually took the torch part of it to the European Court of Human Rights* and won.

*Now we are out of Europe the government can really fuck the public about with no fear of a rulings against it. 

18 hours ago, judgetwi said:

That’s lipstick and it’s not a minge anyway. That’s an open fucking know it all mouth that talks bollocks all day long. Fake, fraud, bullshitter. 

I'm deducing that you're still the persecuted forced to wear the red triangle by a fascist dictator after reading that little tirade. For a man who persistently accuses others of being thick your density continues to both puzzle and amuse me. 

If you wound that neck in with more chins than a chinese phone book attached to it for a week then you'll probably be unshackled. Unfortunately the cultivated Jewdy outlaw image won't allow it, so now Roops has you checkmated. 

Put down the can of Special Brew, take a Valium, read the above, and stop fucking whining. 

You stupendously thick, bum banditry obsessed, scooter speeding cunt! 

4 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

No idea. A lot of the people and conversations from the earlier days are lost in a literal haze for me.

After reading a few of the archived threads it's abundantly clear that the Judge has never once broken character. The fat fucker seemed even more opinionated, uninformed,  and made even more enemies back then. Credit where it's due, he's a thoroughbred cunt. Then again, i`d be an angry, Special Brew guzzling wanker if I was paralysed. 

16 hours ago, Roadkill said:

Good old Ex knew how to make a statement. I'm not even sure he knew what statement he was making, but he knew how to make one.

Was Nobgobbler actually a bird? That avatar used to give the oboe a little twinge picturing a Megan Fox looking twenty something in need of some protein, but given that this site is the finest collection of class a cunts from all four corners i seriously doubt it! 

38 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Misinformed my arse. All music types are either black or gay. With the exception of Tommy Lee from Motley Crue, and Brett Michaels out of Poison, I've seen both of them shag Pamela Anderson on video.

And I think that bloke who sang the theme tune from 'Auf Weiderschein Pet' was normal as well.

If we all liked the same thing this site would die overnight. Agreed regarding old Pammy. I`d still bang that like a snare drum though, the girl knows her way around the pink oboe! 

15 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

 

Black gay cunts

You misinformed cunt, Eric. Me and the rasta are in the production game and have a little reminisce on this thread. The era we are talking about was a time of the races coming together with the help of ecstasy. Half of the producers and dj`s were white and no cunt was really acting black! 

9 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Got that one on vinyl, not sure of the original samples origins though. Definitely in my top 10 jungle tunes and needs to heard on a big system. If I was home I'd be switching the 1210s on. Not sure what happened to DJ Nut Nut either, same for DJ Crystl... Production House like Dee Jay Records were top labels. 

Yep. Dj Crystl was way ahead of his time and was a big influence on Trace along with Voyager. True producers who arranged, engineered and produced their own tunes. Droppin Science and Splash/Juice were other favourites of mine too. 

5 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

I love atmospherics Major, that'll sound heavy remixed. Something about pads and Drum and Bass...must be the high and low frequencies working together. Remember this one?

 

Have you been secretly hacking my computer because i was actually in the process of remixing that but unfortunately couldn't find a clean copy of the original. Dj Nut Nut has disappeared off the face of the earth and there's no mention of where the original samples came from anywhere. 

It's a crying shame because the tune was shaping up beautifully. Played it to a few mates who gave it the seal of approval. 

One of my top ten tunes! 

9 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

 

Beautiful intro on that, Rass. You've actually just given me an idea on looping part of that which could fit in nicely preceding an amen break. 

Get your monitors ready for this bline! 

35 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Back scuttling, brown potting, faggot fucking cunt.

No wonder Frank`s such a fan of the sport. I could actually picture him sporting an erection whilst seated front row, not that anyone would want to bar Lord P. 

Anyways, i have a sneaking suspicion that Timmy was actually Paulie. Coming straight in with numerous references to nonces and starting vendettas with established players, and to top it all off he may potentially be Reptyle trying a new angle. It all aligns itself with me. 

The plot thickens. 

On 30/04/2022 at 00:30, Jake The Muss said:

Major, have you ever read War Horse, you know the krauts were portrayed as semi-decent humans in that book. The most spiteful cunt in it is a horse called Coco.

Can't say that I have, Fend. What was Coco up to in order for him to be portrayed worse than Eichmann? Attempting to fuck members of Jewdy`s clan at a death camp or kicking Soviet conscripts to pieces on the Eastern front? 

You can say what you like about Eichmann, but he managed the Third Reich's railway system like a magician even at the closing day's of the war. I reckon we fucked up badly selling our own rail franchises to the frogs. Personally I would like to see them nationalised again along with the utilities, but that's never gonna happen under a Tory government. 

Anyways, is it worth a read?  

1 hour ago, Jake The Muss said:

Three words to describe Judy....fat hairy arse, by his own admittance.

There's certainly no shortage of three letter descriptives for the wheelchair bound rabbi.  

6 hours ago, Decimus said:

Hold your bagels, Solly. As soon as the Jewnited States of America gets surpassed by the Chinks and God knows who else, your lot will have no one left to hold their mutilated cocks.

There's going to be a lot of angry Arabs when that day comes, and no Zionist Yank scum to fund "The Chosen People's" continued existence.

I can't fucking wait!

Indeed. The unjustified invasion of Iraq wasn't just about Halliburton stealing a few billion barrels of crude along with a fruitless hunt for nuclear weapons. It's real purpose was toppling an arab dictator that posed a threat to the tribe using the dual citizenship holding berg and stein clan that have weaselled their way into key Washington positions. 

Then you have the air campaign in Syria which was originally meant to include boots on the ground but was fortunately postponed by the Taliban's resistance, and sadly thousands of dead/amputee soldier's. Then luckily old Vlad didn't fancy loosing his one Mediterranean port and stepped in to prop up the Assad regime.

You then have the deceased Libyan colonel and even a wheelchair bound piss head can join the dots. 

All the above mentioned countries were sworn enemies of the not so kosher state and are also now completely fragmented or failed states. The sad fact is that some countries can only be held together by tyrants for tribal or reasons of sect. 

All the time their fighting each other they're not looking at the kikes... 

5 hours ago, Decimus said:

Drinks baby blood.

Then buries them.

4 hours ago, Hammer of Cunts said:

Is that an ironic apostrophe?

It might be, HOC, might be...

I forgot about you, but you certainly pass the litmus test.

19 hours ago, judgetwi said:

Makes you cry.

Tears of laughter...

23 hours ago, Decimus said:

Firstly it's a libel trial, Peg, you thick cunt. Secondly, don't ever use American vernacular on here again or I'll be forced to run you off the site.

When it comes to the protagonists, Depp is either suffering from a chronic brain injury or he's pilled off his nut. You'd get more coherence out of a premier league footballer than the disjointed mumblings he's so far whispered out in the dock.

As for Heard, she's clearly a despicable, mental cunt, but I'd split her in two, shit on my duvet be damned.

It seems as though we've been gifted a few thoroughbred numpties in the newbie stake's as of late. Now I've absolutely no problem with them having the punctuation skills of a six year old as long as they make me laugh or have an informed opinion. The above prerequisites seem to be missing in everyone bar Timmy.

Maybe we should have some form of entrance test to weed out the fucking idiot's. I'm thinking a few questions with pointers to get them going. For instance - what are your thoughts on Jeremy Kyle? Were you previously a lurker and if so give three words to describe the Judge.

I'd ask the Vulcan to do it but she's completely devoid of humour.

What a shower of shit!

On 20/02/2022 at 18:34, Wolfie said:

It's poorly researched comments such as this which help diminish my faith in the human race, though I am not surprised to see it coming from a poorly educated thickster with just a handful of brain cells.

A free-range animal in the UK at 'Sunnybrook Farm' will have had space in a field with fresh air, access to clean water, nutritious food, and be housed at the correct temperature to ensure it doesn't suffer extreme cold, wet or heat. It will of course have proper ongoing veterinary care, in addition to correct transportation methods if taken to a local abbatoir (temperature, space, clean water etc.). The slaughter process, different from supermarket practices, would probably be done on-site by such a smallholding and ensure under DEFRA guidelines its livestock will be killed with immediacy using correct equipment/stun voltage etc. to reduce stress for the animal. This method is also greener, which is precisely why I mentioned it previously. Such creatures wouldn't exist if it were not for the purpose of human consumption, which even an indifferent shitcunt who clearly has no respect for them – such as yourself – can understand. Is there a small ray of light coming through to that little space between your ears, yes?

Dogs, cats and other sentient creatures, crammed into Wuhan cages, are often stolen pets transported with no access to water or food in extreme temperatures and squalid conditions, kept with no animal welfare laws in mind (China and South Korea being good examples), meaning hundreds are left in tiny cages to fight among themselves in their faeces (you'll probably be wanking until you catch fire when reading that), who are often fed rotting leftovers from the slitty-eyed cunts with small cocks who fuel the abysmal fucking 'industry' in the first instance. This, before the terrified creatures are beaten to within an inch of their lives and skinned or boiled alive. The flavour of the meat is allegedly increased via adrelanine if the animal suffers before death. If you don't believe me, just Google 'Chinese torture dogs or cats' or similar, though I'll be surprised if it affects your obvious nonchalance towards animal torture.

Now, are you seeing the difference between both practcies? There's a huge disparity between the dead animal in your stomach whose life has been 99% free range at Sunnybrook Farm and an animal which has suffered terribly during its life (and death). Dogs have been our most trusted companions for millennia. When was the last time a sheep or cow or chicken was trained by the police or army to diffuse a bomb in a shopping centre, for example?

The only thing more surprising than your lack of knowledge (or empathy) is why I actually devote my time attempting to educate vapid cunts such as yourself. Perhaps I might beat it into you one day, in person.

Spot on. I'm not going to bother getting in to the 'in's and out's' of the merits and more importantly benefits of eating free range meat/produce, but my options pretty much mirror yours.

The multicoloured, large font, look at my post, animal cruelty enthusiastic fucking idiot has once again been shown up. I'm actually staggered that he's denser than I originally thought and compliments the corey from Crewe perfectly.

He's definitely swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool, but his comments on this thread have almost pulled him out.

What an utter cunt!

On 23/04/2022 at 22:07, Frank said:

I wish you'd permanently leave the site, I really do. Fucking horrible little thing. 

If there was a vote amongst the faithful regarding the punter they'd most like to see log off and take a bath with an electric heater then I'd wager heavily on you, Franco.

Although like a tumor you've grown on me. This place wouldn't be the same though without your piss poor attempts at Machiavellian-esque shit stirring and being repaid with more hidings than an average northern housewife.

You cunt!

18 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I like him. He's getting banned before next weekend, but that won't hurt his standing around here.

He's come straight in with a vicious prime Mike Tyson uppercut. Agreed about the ban, they should be worn as badges of honour. Hopefully he only gets 48 hours as a first offence.

Definitely got a point about a few professing admiration for Savile on that thread. I honestly think that the filthy now then, now then, jingle jangle fucking beast was heavily involved in the occult.

How the fuck did he have more protection than Prince Andrew? It's an interesting comparison when people knew of Savile's activities for year's.