Topper

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Just had a run in with Topper. He's a 50 something bloke that's never grown out of telling tall tales. He got his nickname from when he was working in the steelworks. Every morning the lads would all arrive at work and start sharing news of what's happened over night or over the weekend as the case may be. Didnt matter what you had done or seen, Topper would always go one better. EG topping it. One Monday morning everyone turned up for the shift and a lad called Steve started telling a story of his weekend. It was along the these lines: Had an amazing weekend! won the lottery on Friday, dropped 8 million quid. Spent some of it on a Ferrari on Saturday. Drove it to work this morning and picked up Claudia Schiffer at the bus stop. Filthy bitch was so grateful she noshed me off while I was driving and swallowed the lot. She's just taken the Ferrari home and is giving it a wash for me, then shes going to start cleaning the house up. He then looks at Topper and says, "nar fucking top that ya silly bastard". Needless to say everyone was pissing themselves laughing. This nomination is for Topper and any other silly cunt who can't stop bullshitting.