Cunty BigBollox

Homes under the hammer??!! Fucking shit one-sided programme that portrays the lucky spuds that have made a few quid. What about the ones that aren't so lucky and end up losing money big style, followed by a messy divorce and then killing themselves in despair after ending up in the local YMCA. I think I'd consider watching it then.

ps. I've got some special linctus for Lucy Alexanders throat as she always sounds a bit hoarse.

20 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I like him. I've got a couple of his cook books and his 'Ainsley Harriot"  couscous range is good. 

Racist cow! He's not Chinese you know.

One minor observation. Other than the fact the two photos offered don't show any tits they also don't appear to be selfies. Yet another made up story from the Bishop of Bullshit.

Eric, are you a retired old bastard that thinks any change is evil? Just asking.

On 10/7/2018 at 11:40 AM, The Bishop of Phlegm said:

I have a neigbour who bought a Ford Ecoboost car because he was worried about hybrid car batteries exploding. His Ecoboost has just joined the list of Ford Ecoboosts that have caught fire.

No offence but, i really hope it catches fire at night and spreads to your house when you're fast asleep.

Have a nice day.

If you got the ugliest hippos arse you had ever seen, and slapped some fake tan on it, put it in a pair of skates  and a blindfold on it and then let it loose in a paint factory. Well thats what Gemma Collins looks like on that Dancing on Ice shit tonight.

#fuckingrepulsiveslag

She is one fucking useless waste of carbon. I would prefer to stick my cock up Punkapes capacious ring than sling one up this fat munter. That's how much she despises me. I hope she slips on some of her own fresh vom and breaks her fucking neck. 

25 minutes ago, Frank said:

Such a superb, dry wit. Brilliant.

Stupid fucking cunt. 

Didn't Ming like the odd wild mushroom?

You Dennis Nilsen sounding cunt. 

Sounds reasonable to me. We ought to get somebody trustworthy and competent to look into it. Dr Gillian McKeith sounds ideal.

Fucking load of bollox and fuck off Flemmy.

On 1/12/2019 at 11:46 AM, cuntspotter said:

...and I still haven’t sold it

Did you leave the dead prostitute in the boot? I find it limits your potential buyers.

I'm afraid you confirmed the level of their IQ when you said they drive a Rover, and you definitely confirmed they are bunch of brainless fuckwits when you said they work with you at the garbage depot. Have you been pulled by the pigs during your commute with potential terrorists?

5 hours ago, Jiggerycock said:

The Latin prep, the ferrules, the ritual sodomy and the wanking of the school Leopard.

A heady mix indeed

Don't forget getting a blow job from a dead pigs head.

I emulated the film BEFORE going to see it and I must say it was uneventful and dark in my blindfold.

The one and only time I played on one of these FOBT was when I went to put my Irish Lottery bet on at the bookies and they had one free £2 play as a promotion. Three minutes later I'm £30 up, take winnings never to touch the fucking things again. I prefer bets where there is an actual element of uncertainty of whether you'll win or lose plus, I'm not a fucking idiot.

Mr & Mrs Decimus of Caister are locally referred to as the title of this nom. What a coincidence!

3 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Drew you horrid little ferret of a man. I'm currently reading the new C.J. Sampson novel, 'Tombland' which is set in 16th century Norwich. 

What do you think about that?

 

Fucking ace. Does it mention anything about road closures and cycle routes fucking up the transport system in the 16th century?

2 minutes ago, Xenominge said:

The shed is already full of his old shit and apparently working in the back garden is too cold.

Then why not let him have access to your front garden. It might just distract his attention from fiddling with his chopper and playing kids computer games.

Well all this jibba jabba about cooking techniques has convinced me you're definitely a raving, shitty starfish stabber. We've got a bit of a he/she on another nom. who cant stop talking about motorbikes and X-box that probably has a bigger cock than you Punky.

Do you not have a garage or a large garden shed he could carry out home mechanics in?, or do you live in a flat or an alms house like some of the chav sputum on here.

It doesn't sound as if there's going to be any pushing effort when it's time for the sprog to make an appearance. Although I have it on good authority that child birth is so easy you can do it in your sleep - would any of the female members concur with this.

4 hours ago, Earl of Punkape said:

Your opinion is warped, sneering and based on petty jealousy and perversion.

 You should develop a Christian moral code and live by it’s scriptures and tenets.

You sound badly constipated.

These sound like the opinions of someone who is also morbidly obese. I presume you're a catcher in your gay relationship with a vicar, I honestly don't think you have the stamina to pitch. LOL

Fuck the demon drink. What about people who can't handle their FOOD or, more to the point, people who handle too much food straight into their big fat gobs and then thinks the NHS should bear the cost of getting them out of their depression because they can no longer wear clothes from TopShop, type text messages on their I-phone or wipe their own arse. A prime example of this is the obese Munter, Joanne Keeling, who seems to be plastered all over Sky News. Fat lazy fuckers should be rendered into glue.

On 1/2/2019 at 8:13 PM, Wizardsleeve said:

It could be on advice of the plod ............

You could almost say, "they were only following orders". I've certainly heard that excuse before somewhere.

I would say more like 1-1, both own goals and in off the arse.

I suppose it's better than "Pieface" Although I do believe Katie Price nearly started this trend when she contemplated calling one of her sprogs "Guess Who?" in relation to the unknown parentage.