It won't be long now ..

[colonelkurtz]

..... here it comes again - the children in need tv special -  the annual self serving smugfest of so called celebs and gobshites crowing on and letting us all know how they do a few extra hours fer charidee don't you know  [time and a half plus expenses no doubt] . Look in wonder mere mortals at how we go to the trouble of providing you with slices of easily digestible sentimental slosh in order to coax a few quid off you , although any amount you give will never come close to the invaluable contribution our presence makes to proceedings [not to mention career moves par excellence]. Yes - help out vulnerable and deserving children by all means but enough already with the "hey -aren't we just so wunnerful everybody" bollocks . So to all you 2nd rate dj's,comedians,cheeky chappies,assorted has beens and national treasures go and fuck right off cunts one and all because surely even you thick bastards can't fail to see the sordid irony in the bbc purporting to help protect children. And if that rantzen woman shows her fecking face it could well be a size 9 DM through the screen.

[Guest]

If Sir Philip Greene paid his full wack of UK tax, we wouldn't need Children in Need, poppies, Comic Relief, the NHS, etc.