Cuntybaws

“The four most over-rated things in life are champagne, lobster, anal sex, and picnics.”

If this was true, surely Bergerac would have put a stop to it?

Any particular hole? Or would you stab him a few new ones first?

Kinda wobbly aren'tcha?

Dirty little cock-smoking, fudge-packing, squeaky-voiced abomination. I'd ram a rabid ferret up his arse and an ebola-ridden weasel down his throat, and let them fight it out to the death somewhere around his kidneys.

Don't spend it all in the same shop. Unless it's just a pound, in which case spend it all in a Pound Shop.

You have to let it "load". (Not unlike your erection!) If you click in the box too soon it confuses it sometimes.

Bet you've met a few, though.

At least they don't usually try to talk to you, unlike the mad old grannies on part-time minimum wage. Fuck, those old cunts would work for free just to stay warm and get staff discount on cat food.

I'd like to say it's been nice knowing you, but that would be a lie.

Fuck me, now that's what I call an avatar! I must try this new "politeness" angle more often.

Puffy? Puffy? Seriously - fucking puffy? And not a barrister joke in sight, I despair.

Dear Mike, In future might you please consider: Putting up a picture Expanding just slightly on the subject text Getting yourself an avatar. You cunt, Baws

Tomorrow night just throw 'em your missus for a spitroast. You get some sleep, everyone's happy.

Fuck, I thought the man-machine interface was pretty blurred there already. Mind you, he couldn't be any worse then Jenson Button.

I hope they don't make any references to contentiously-named French villages, or some cunt will delete them!

I once sneaked into a walled garden to take a piss on the way home from a late night party somewhere in London without realising it was a convent. I heard a harsh grunt from behind me (luckily I was just about done) and I turned round to see a dark cowled figure looming over me. For one terrible moment I thought I'd been caught befouling Wayne Manor - I very nearly had a shit to keep the piss company!

We're LADIES!

Oh fuck, I just remembered that duet he did with Sporty Spice. Ever wonder which of them had the biggest penis? (A clue - it wasn't Bryan.)

Cramp during the vinegar strokes is a real hazard for the more mature lady or gentleman (delete as appropriate, depending on who is on top.) Once, by the time I'd realised Mrs Baws wasn't just faking her usual multiple orgasm, she'd almost gone into full cardiac arrest!

...and not even the tiniest bit tedious!