Roadkill

I wouldn't know, I live in Newcastle. The Mackems tend to eat anyone trying to enter from the south and the Scots get them addicted to heroin before they can make it here from the north. The one's trying to enter by the east take one look at Tynemouth and drown themselves in self defense and I think the Roman Legions are still in control of the west approaches - no cunt ever comes from that direction and no cunt has ever bothered to check.

Don't trust what you see on the internet. A punter on here adopted one (I can't remember who) and she turned out to be a right pig faced little gremlin. I think it's just a fast one to get the Chernobyl mutants out of the gene pool.

Could be just the excuse he's after for just a tiny little tactical nuke in Ukraine though if he decides to spin it that way. Or mobilization. Reports of the vehicle used by the attackers confirm Ukraine plates - absolutely not evidence in any way, probably just a false flag by mischievous terrorists - but he could use it. He's used much less in the past and has a fresh election to exploit.

Of course, completely overshadowed on the BBC by whatever fucking Royal has been licking used graphite rods this week, its only an event that could kick off world war fucking three in several different ways. I wonder what Harry and Kate have to say about all this?

What a fucking night it is in Mother Russia. A bunch of mysterious cunts have walked into a packed concert hall and shot everyone to shit. ISIS claims responsibility, but they're attention seeking little cunts who'll claim anything these days for the chance to suck Allah's cock. Russia really wants it to be Ukraine responsible for the attack, almost perversely so, but Action Man isn't having any of it and Ukraine is denying having any connection. Europe is finding itself in the awkward position of trying to sound sympathetic over the deaths of unarmed Russian civilians despite spending the last few months bigging each other up and super seriously threatening to send troops in to Ukraine, but only to help little old ladies across roads and walk dogs, honest. And the good old USA of all fucking places predicted and warned Americans working and living in Russia about this exact fucking thing kicking off a while back. It's all very fucking sketchy. If this was just some rowdy ragheads, they're going to get so much virgin cock in Valhalla or wherever they go after they blow themselves up.

What have they been up to? Is someone cleaning the carpets of the palace with Radithor?

Disgusting! I want to speak to a manager now!

That's for your own good. Both me and @Wolfie can be long-winded cunts - unlike @Mrs Roops and @King Billy - we have the self control to understand that an argument between us would hold very little entertainment value for spectators.

The rest of the internet was sterilised years ago. I'm sure there's a few last bastions but the chances are they're full of hardcore spackers who would consider you a softy for not demanding outright genocide. There's no middle ground on anything anymore - or at least the majority of the population finds existence more engaging when they pretend that there isn't.

I don't understand... Is this an auction?

Jesus fucking Christ, Wolfie. Ever think this sort of bollocks might be why people don't want to discuss shit seriously on here? It descends into preaching shite cunts already know. No one really wants to debate, they just want to initiate conversation so they can give their opinion. We're never going to change the world on this shit hole of a site either way. But we can (and should) laugh at it as it burns down around us.

Make it so that asylum seekers need to have five years of gainful employment before they become applicable for benefits (with reasonable exceptions for the elderly or obviously disabled). Instant and uncompromising deportation for any of the cunts caught growing or selling drugs, driving without a license or insurance, or any other kind of bullshit. Basically ask the bare minimum - for them to contribute to the economy before taking advantage of it and follow the law - with the promise that if they fuck about they can fuck off back where they came from. All the prisons do is give them three hot meals a day and give them a chance to have little radicalising group meetings.

FFS. The "froth frothing" incident alone would have seen him obliterated in the old days. Terrible sentence structure.

All you've done is bring old cunts back to moan at how shite you are. I'm one of them - I was fucking done with the place until I saw you and Hawwod plastering the place with shite. You're nothing but bait and - fuck me for saying it - but at least @ChildeHarold is capable of getting off his high horse and at least attempting to fuck with people and have some fun.

I think I freaked out @Ape™️ that one time I told him about the dream I had about my face coming off and being too scared to put it back on in case I got an infection. Quitting the wacky baccy after seven years of everyday use gives you fucked up dreams when you do finally manage to get to fucking sleep.

The hostile and tribal nature of the place is intentional. Users have developed this behaviour over decades simply as a way to have fun - a newer member such as yourself will be given a hard time to trigger a response, get a feel of how short fused you are and rate you on your writing ability. It's why people keep seemingly picking fights with you out of nowhere - you're bland as shite and we want to see you try, make some of us laugh, write a creative insult - anything other than fucking political fucking opinion news articles. If you don't up your game soon you'll end up established as a low quality poster with nothing of interest.

You shirking little twat. Like mother like son. That's fine, just leave the old man to herd the spastics. I'm selling your Playstation. You've left it here for over two weeks now and I need the money for petrol if I'm going to be doing triple shifts at the spacker ranch.

You really want to open that Pandora's box, Harold? @King Billy could fucking drown you in conspiracy theories. He'll have you begging for a tinfoil hat and a map of 5G coverage safe zones. Even if you don't believe him (and you probably will, because you're a bit of a spastic, no offence), you'll ask just to shut him up. He doesn't even believe I'm real, Harold. Roadkill died back in 2020 after he got the COVID vaccine - I'm just an AI construct.

You fuck.

I think he likes little humiliation wanks in candle lit rooms...

Oh, FFS. No, Billy, why don't cannibals eat clowns?

It's fucking nuts over there, Billy. Cannibalism is actually the tamer bit.

You're genuinely mental. You're just connecting names to random statements - I'm sure it sounds like a crippling accusation to you - trapped inside that misfiring blob of sludge that was once a fully functioning mind, but you're talking boulders, Harry. Mind you, I'd pay a few squid for a quick peek behind your eggs - experience existence from your progressive. How fucked up are you? Can you taste sounds and smell colours yet?

Does the shit you post actually make sense to you? Are you a stroke victim? I think you might need to see a neurologist. Edit: Actually, nevermind. You just power through it.

There's some black cunt called Barbecue taking over Haiti at the moment.