Rev

Yeah, I used to love Discharge and even met Rainy, when they played a Punk festival with a friend's band a few years back.

I had a couple of fucking useless young cunts at my last place of work. Trying to train illiterate bastards with the IQ of a fucking Toblerone how to perform the most perfunctory of tasks is like digging up Nancy Reagan, having a wet shit in her crumbling chest cavity and wiping your arse with her withered hands.

That fucking bellend Peter Grant (no, not that Peter Grant) is the only cunt not to outright ban me. He's a prick. I'm already on their undesirable list for having letters condemning the cunts left, right and centre in the papers.

Fuck me. I had to zoom in to make sure that wasn't me keeping pedestrian bastards on their fucking toes. Walking across Abbey Road doesn't make you look cool. It makes you look a cunt. John Lennon was a fucking cockthistle. And a cunt.

That pretty much sums the cunt up quite accurately. She has no fucking idea how Scotland will vote next month, but the most recent poll (which has nearly six times the respondents than other polls) suggests that she can fuck off if she wants to hold another referendum if we're pulled out of the EU. The cunt can't hold one anyway, it's a reserved to Westminster matter, not a devolved one, but her unquestioning following of fucken spoon-burning junkies don't have the nous to comprehend this. Cunts.

Yeah. The nats targeted the demographic most likely to be seduced by their turbo-charged benefits for all, Special Brew and Black Tar Heroin on prescription crowd. They only got 26% of the vote. I've been banned from every SNP MP and MSPs' pages, bar one, for pointing out a few uncomfortable facts to them. They are utterly talentless and bigoted cunts.

It's true, dee. It was his moon-faced brown-hatter "husband", David something or fucking other. Apparently, he covered himself in olive oil and stuck his own body-weight in Jelly Babies up his arse, while getting fisted by some other bassoon-playing arse-bishop cunt, or something.

I fucking despise the Sturgeon sow with a passion. Now that her deputy, Stewart "the bastard Mr Potato Head cunt" Hosie has shagged some gonorrhoea-addled bint and left his wife, Shona Gummidge, there is no cunt left to take over their fucking useless "summer of love" independence campaign, because her party singularly lacks any talent, or quality. The not yet outed fuck-ugly lesbian Sturgeon is destroying this country, by presenting herself as the voice of Scotland and fucking up every public service, then simply blaming the English. She's a cunt and should be cleansed with fire, then have her screaming remains dumped in a dog-fighting pit. Bastard.

I think it used to sing for Whitesnake, but fell on hard times. Jeremy Corbyn has been using her as a cock-holster/draught excluder more recently.

This Delvigne lesbian, pastafarian, transgender, vegan cunt has a face like a stir-fried shit. Nothing a few belts with a fucking trenching shovel wouldn't sort out. I'm all about giving.

You'd overlook the beard and moustache? You're a braver man than I.

It looks like that fucking munter Sinead O'Dreary Cunt Connor has Lord Lucaned after "going out for a ride" on her bike. Hopefully they'll find her charred remains up a mountain before the decade's end.

That woman who sings Chicken Madras in that Just Eat advert. I will fuck her. Hard.

I hope you don't mind sloppy seconds, Mr B. She'll be rather accommodating and baggy (pretty much everywhere) once I've tired of her.

Euro-cunt, gender-neutral arse-candles performing their singularly dreary, talentless pish in front of an audience of mature squirters and man-bag wearing shirtlifters. I would visit fire upon them to cleanse the bastards, but as it is, I'm half cut on spiced rum and thrashing out Black Mountain Side on my Danelectro, like any proper bloke would. Any cunt watching this fuck-arsery should be kneecapped and scalped, but not necessarily in that order. Bastards.

I certainly don't get that fish-dissecting, short-sighted ponce Hirst. Neither do I understand that fucking fuck-ugly, spastic-jawed piss-witch Emin. That's not art. It's shit. That cunt Saatchi bought that "unmade bed" crap for fuck knows how much and it now bears zero resemblance to the crock of fucking mince that Emin showcased. These fucking wankers need pushed through a fucking bark-stripper, set on fire and put out with a golf shoe, before having the bastarding fuck kicked right out of them. They can all cunt off, they are fucking irrelevant and a parasitical drain on genuine ability. Cunts.

Fucking hell, Mr B, football to a proper, self-respecting Scoattish cunt like me is just far, far too fucking gay to contemplate. Eleven fucking bender-haircutted mincing pansies flouncing around on a bit of grass wearing man-tutus and chasing a shiny ball just doesn't cut the fucking mustard with an Alpha cunt like me. Footballists are a shower of teabagging arse-bishops and fucking sausagers...and cunts.

Football's for cunts....and poofs.

What exactly is people's beef with Mrs R? I never saw bile directed at her before. Have I missed something?

Fuck me, it's Nicola Sturgeon after a shampoo. Even the fucking beard is accurate.

I shall take leave of this internal argument, but dare I suggest perhaps a picture of a nice clitoris could bring us all a bit of closure and set the record straight.

Nope. Pooves and those of a disposition for fucking minors aren't made in Glasgow. They all come from East Kilbride and Wishaw. Twelve fingered cunts.

Yes.

I'm sure he was caught with images on his computer and was jailed for it, but might be wrong. Who cares...the cunt is dead now. Couldn't be happier.

I am indeed from Scotland, Eddie, as are a couple of others here. However, being the dandy about town cunt that I am, I have never burdened the state with the disease that is unemployment in my entire life. That is the jurisdiction of the dole-scrounging nationalist scum currently infecting my country.