Decimus

I dunno, being Londonm's wife must be pretty fucking horrendous.I'd be wishing for death everyday.

It's because your fingers are swollen through all the anal fisting you've been indulging in. Its hard to hit the right quote in those circumstances.

As the Queen is head of the Church of England, I doubt she is going to endorse Catholicism. Cunt.

I knew I'd tempt you out of your hiding place. Welcome back San Francisco, how was clink?

During my younger days I wasn't as discerning in my choice of female companion. Basically I'd fuck anything. I wanted a piece of one of the lesser dykey looking players on the local women's football team and took up her offer of a camping trip. Just me her and a couple of Sandi Toksvigs. The dirty cunts spent three days sweating profusely kicking a ball about, with not one sponge bath between them for the entire time. On our last night, the lesser dyke forced its way into my tent, declaring tonight was my lucky night, and promptly dropped its unisex briefs... Never have my nasal passages been so viciously and brutally assaulted. The smell emanating from it was akin to a pigs bladder stuffed full of cat sick and 50 day old rotting mackerel, which had subsequently been left to marinate for a month in pool of raw sewage. Needless to say its the only time I've ever turned down sex.... Apart from the PM Frank sent a few weeks back, a filthy proposition involving two litres of olive oil, a tub of taramasalata and a broken fridge magnet depicting the island of Lesbos.

"God save Ireland!" said the heroes; "God save Ireland" said they all. Whether on the scaffold high Or the battlefield we die, Oh, what matter when for Erin dear we fall!

Since the third generation in me is Irish, I think I'm better placed to know what Celts are than you. And actually, the correct historical term would be Britons. Celtic is a fairly modern identity. Silly boy, and a thick cunt to boot.

Naughty, but fucking funny.

We have already had a thread on Halloween. A cuntfest extraordinaire imported from the colonies. American English is steadily creeping into the younger generations lexicon, as they progressively expand to bronyesque proportions gorging on filthy yank cuisine. All this I have taken in my stride. If a chunky child wants to dress up like a cunt, knock on a few doors and drop the odd U from their spelling then bully for them. But after watching the idiot box this morning, I've decided enough is enough. Every cunting channel was dedicated to weekend cookery shows, giving great recipe ideas on how to celebrate THANKSGIVING. The thought of this shit slowly being forced on us year by year has enraged me. I can picture it now, Clinton cards milking this bollocks big time and brainwashed girlfriends up and down the country pouting because their boyfriends haven't bought them a card for Thanksgiving. Well I ain't buying into this shit, its got fuck all to do with us and the cunts can keep it. I might be persuaded to celebrate 4th July though, purely in fucking absolute relief that by going independent we got shot of the mad, creationist bastards. And Donny Osmond is a fucking A class cunt of the highest fucking order. But that's a tale for another time.

Pobol y cwm.

No, even Wales isn't 100% Welsh. Prestatyn is a massive cunt.

And if you don't get the point I'm trying to make you're a fucking idiot.

If you're English you should fuck off back to Saxony if that's your opinion. This island was 100℅ Welsh before your sort come here.

Mr Sheen is a randy cunt.

Good points here, Jazz. I think in the past immigrants came to more or less make something of themselves. They did it because there are few better countries in the world where the infrastructure is such that if you're willing to work your arse off, you can build a decent life in a tolerant and fair society. Nowadays it seems that a number of people come to this country for what they can get for free, with no effort or contribution on their part. When you add religion as a factor, some of these people use that as an excuse to actively resist integration. Im more than happy for people to have their own culture, as long as they remember first and foremost that this is Britain, and the dominant culture quite rightly is that of the British. If people aren't willing to accept that then they have no place here. Integration is everything, and if a person is not willing to learn the language, contribute to society, and respect our heritage and culture then they know where the door is.

I'll tell you a story about immigration. My Grandfather came to this country when he was 18 and hasn't claimed a single penny in benefits. Instead he has paid more than the average amount of tax towards the upkeep of this country, and has provided decent wages and employment opportunities for hundreds of local ENGLISH people. He's had four children, all of whom he paid to bring up on his own dollar, with no subsidy from the state. They have all gone on to pay their taxes, and not rely on anyone, let alone the government to support themselves and the 12 children they have between them. Now its my generations turn and not a single grandchild of my grandfather is unemployed, and all pay more than enough tax. This isn't an isolated story, there are thousands upon thousands of families with a history of immigration who have integrated and been brought up with values of hard work and the notion that if you don't work, you don't eat. Because it is no ones responsibility apart from your own to look after yourself and your own family. Balance this attitude with that of the millions of "pure blooded" British people who generation after generation spew out kids they can't afford to pay for, and have no intention of working to provide for and you get a far bigger problem than immigration. I'm not saying all immigrants are contributing and trying to integrate, far from it. But to tar them all with the same brush because of the action of a minority is, frankly, a load of fucking bollocks.

At least Phil Collins is in Switzerland, so its not all bad.

Can we have a live feed to Franks cell in the scrubs? I hear he plays a mean bouzouki.

Come now, I'm game if you are. We certainly wouldn't lack conversation.

Sebastian was a cunt.

That's four of them, what an anti-Semite!

I don't much fancy a diet that consists solely of a Turkish rentboys jizz and anal hair. I'd rather look old if it's all the same to you.

Rest assured, Keith, Frank is currently taking it up the Tzatziki in a category B prison. That's karma for you.

It's all about opinion and perspective "on the one hand this, and on the other that." On the one hand Jeremy Beadle had a tiny cock. But on the other it looked huge.

Are the seals former employee's of the BBC?