Neil

I think he's too wet to burn

Oh dear Oh dear Oh dear,Feed him to the pigs Errol

A long queue outside the bingo

Yet another in a long line of grammar nazis Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Am I not wooly enough for you?.You don't need to describe yourself,I know what an amoeba looks like.

I can take all that but where the fuck does the 'fat' come in?,me thinks you must be a lard arse that hates himself so much that you barely go out.Go raid the fridge again and then crawl back into bed and rest your loathesome porky frame,soon be breakfast time

Fuck off Bubbles,who you trying to kid,we all know you've got a fucking mobility scooter because your obese fucking frame is too much for you pins

Seriously they had one near me once where some twat on two wheels decided to part company with his noggin',When flowers were placed at the scene with a wooden cross and ribbons and bows they actually put his crash helmet on the spot.I never did slow down enough to see but I hoped they scraped his fucking head out of it first.The considerate ones literally crash & burn,saves a fucking fortune on burial costs

What is it with this fucked up practice?.Why would you want to build a fucking memorial made up of cuddly fucking toys and flowers by some tree on the verge of the B1046?.Must be very comforting to go back time and time again and just picture Wayne or Barry lying there with his head 5 yards away from his contorted chavvy twisted body.What are they hoping for?,to still see traces of blood or brains to remind them of their lost ones?.Just look back at the photos of when they were still fucking breathing instead of reliving their last actions on this planet.Next one I see gets pissed on.Fuck off

Where do I sign up?

Are you and Quincy using the same fucking phone whilst he gives you a reach around?

Ok,in something you'll understand better,she's lying there,body of an angel,naked,wet and beckoning you to fuck her and 'pop' you've just spunked in your pants you fucking bed wetting virgin

It was the 'open goal' reference,you quite obviously blasted over the bar from 2 yards you useless spastic

Hits the post and puts the rebound wide

Up there you think it's a fucking holiday island you thick northern monkey

In off the post!

Stubbed your toe and fell over ,Lukaku at his best

Row Z ,couldn't hit a cows arse with a banjo

Not a bad effort,at least you worked the keeper

Quite literally it's a fucking pain in the arse.If you've never had it then hope the fuck you never do.If anyone can suggest anything that can ease my suffering then I'd be very grateful. (Taking bleach or running into oncoming traffic are not an option) I realise this is an open goal for some of you cunts but even I know most of you will hit the corner flag.Fuck off

and swingers

I doubt it

3/10 must do better

This may come as a shock to you spunk but that avatar is not really me.If you want to call me a cunt then put something more apt in front of it.......over to you,I,ll let you know when you get close.Now please wrap your 7 iron around your own head.Toodle fucking pip

Did someone say that had some pussies that need stuffing?.....I'm here!