Frank
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Posts posted by Frank
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All local radio hosts in the South East have exactly the same voice and mannerisms. I think they are so scared of offending anyone with wit or intelligence, they churn out thousands of human clones from a factory line in Swindon.
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GORNNNN MAAAAAAAAAAAAAD
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GORNNNN MAAAAAAAAAAAAAD… Noted.
That's not entirely true.. smuggy. LBC's Nick Abbot, although restricted, has both wit and intelligence.
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Rim-minkey, bill. Minkey.
A schoolboy error Scotty. The conceited bore will be the first to acknowledge that there still is so much to learn… the tenant scum.
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Even without a bottle of Pinot, would render pudding incapable of a chunky anything, let alone eating from a girls arse, though give him a whiff of Stickers, and he's hit the real McCoy.
I don't particularly want to get involved in any of this nastiness.. I'm sure you'll both come to your sappy senses. When did Decimus become a pudding?
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Gobbie, I hate to think of a dirty northern lass going without a thorough pringling. In Frank's absence, I'm willing to abandon all sense of propriety and give you the once over with a bag of chunky salt and vinegar McCoy's. Now spit the mushy peas and fag out of your gob and pucker up. I've had two bottles of pinot and I'm ready to take up Frank's burden.
The Spotlight understudy filling for the understudy who failed to show. Plain awful.
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Greetings Phlip.
I hope that by admitting to feel sorry for JAZZ, has sent you to the land of hatred by the Bozo Boys, and although I am somewhat touched by your claims, I am not at present going to welcome you or fuck you off. Just so long as you are not French. I cannot stand the cunts.
I could only wish to aspire to the things you've achieved in this corner for cunts. The difference you make hasn't gone unnoticed.
I am a little further south of France - the med runs through my vains.
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Arise, Sir Van.
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Pull your tongue out of our collective arseholes you odious little rim-monkey.
What an awful priggish little man. Perhaps we can come up with some sort of schedule that you can follow, so that we can get along. Meanwhile, kindly shut the fuck up.
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You've got me. I'm jealous of his overwhelming popularity. Look around, it's clear to see that everyone loves him.
He has his place. I don't like to see the weak being bullied by all and sundry. Put yourself in his shoes.. you can't argue with an idiot.
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Of course, how silly of me. I didn't realise that criticising a cretin who has never had an original thought and is incapable of structuring even the most basic of sentences, would illuminate my own deficiencies. Such as my ability to communicate rationally, debate, contribute original thoughts and communicate coherently using the English language.
If I wished for validation from a vacuous, shit stirring fucking nobody, I'd start posting YouTube links and child-like doodles created with my own shite. But as I don't, I'll carry on as I am thanks. Hopefully you'll choke to death chuckling like a fucking idiot whilst watching Jazz's latest Jib Jab creation. If not, I suggest you preempt this outcome by killing yourself immediately.
Like I said - bitter.
Great site by the way.
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I received a rather ludicrous fine of £100 some time ago for parking in a deserted car park. However, I gleefully realised that the registration had been written down wrong on the ticket. I thought nothing more of it, assuming they would realise their glaring error, and not bother trying to intimidate me for money. If you're going to be money grabbing cunts, at least do it with some attention to detail for fucks sake.
Instead, I received a rather strongly worded letter from them in the post. Needless to say, I have sent them one back:
Dear Conkai Security Limited,
On the 8th of June, 2015, I received a letter in the post from your organisation, demanding payment of £100.
I attach to this email a scan of a document I found erroneously attached to my car windshield, on the 3rd of March, 2015.
The specified vehicle registration on the ticket is Yxxx xxx. There is clearly some confusion on your part, as my car registration is Kxxx xxx. I suggest you contact the owner of the aforementioned vehicle, in order to retrieve the money you assert is owed.
As I am sure you are aware, the Protection of Freedoms Act (2012), Schedule 4, Section 56, ‘Recovery of Unpaid Parking Charges’, Paragraph 7 (2, a) states that for a private parking charge to be legally enforceable, “the notice must specify the vehicle.”
Any further communication from Conkai Security Limited to myself on this matter will be regarded as unsolicited harassment. This letter is therefore also to inform Conkai Security Limited that any additional telephone calls, emails or letters relating to this issue will be charged at a flat fee of £100 per communication.
If however, payment is received from Conkai Security Limited within 28 days, a reduced charge of £60 will be accepted as full and final settlement. Failure to make payment within 28 days of initiating any communication will result in the full charge of £100 being applied, plus any additional costs incurred through debt recovery and/or court action.
Sunniest regards,
As if I'm going to disclose my name on this forum.
Thanks for sharing your superb response Bill. Quite clearly a self-absorbed narcissistic time wasting bore.
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Yes, all those big words without pictures to help along the narrative must leave you even more confused than usual.
I rather enjoy the the dizziness of the Jazz character. This bitter animosity towards him only serves to highlight your own shortcomings.
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FIFA
in The Corner
"Thickstick" "dirty fucking stinking whore"!
You've had over an hour and that's the best you can come up with? You're too stupid to bother with.
Noted.
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FIFA
in The Corner
I could eat a bowl of alphabet spaghetti and shit a better statement than that Frank.
With respect, it's not really a 'statement'... thickstick. I've asked a straight forward question regarding your promiscuity, made a basic assumption on your availability, and more or less called you a dirty fuckin stinking whore.
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I guess I will be safe for a few years then, or decades, since they'll never find it...
You were in my dream last night, dingalong. There was you and I, Jacko and Gobbie night fishing for carp in a pop-up tent on the Regent's canal. One by one, we all set fire to ourselves. Gobbie had awful acne scars... but an incredibly full bosom.
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FIFA
in The Corner
When I first saw her I was about 14 and she looked great and as a youngster I wanted to be so like her. When I found out she was in her 30's i thought "Naah she's so old".
Oi stinkhole, how many boss-eyed inbred knobs have you had up your dusty? I'd assume the 'ladies' within your unwashed commune are shared around like a packet of fucking wine gums. I can only imagine the state of your mattress.
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Finish me off, Frank. I'm done, I find myself sitting here with absolutely nothing to say. No barbed witticism, no acidic retort. I'm a shadow of my former self and I'm invoking paragraph 12 of our secret pact. Drown my in a sack full of cats and brunmies. This is the end of my CC journey, and its only fitting you finish me off. Au revoir, you horrible cunt.
Pile of shit.
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Where the fuck is Tot when we need him ? Eh ?
Long live the tot. Hurrah. Shit.
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Indeed. But I am one of the few that would not take offence at your caustic comments. By way of apology, I shall allow you to buy me a refreshing gin based cocktail in the near future (I think I can get you in the Battery Club if Ming dresses you).
Tonight Jacqueline I'm at Ronnie Scott's... Marlena Shaw. Wonderful. I started with Côte-Rôtie for lunch and I'm fucking smokin in my Kilgour blue. Some lingering looks from the mature ladies. Shame Ming's with me... the mis-hog.
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Spot on Franco - but I'm happy. And readies just burn a hole in my pocket.
'Fat wife' That was too rude of me.. although close friends should always speak the truth. I would never have left Aña May if she hadn't become so fucking fat. Such a sweet face.
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I do look at bit "foreign" to some .. the ethnic Romany does show up and I can look a bit "eastern". The "right bit of documation" can have the strangest of effects about 30 years ago I was returning to dear old blighty via Dover when I was pulled to one side to have the works done on my luggage and doubtless to be frisked .. one had started on my luggage and the other was checking my documentation when he noticed my railway pass .. "Oh you work for the railway! .. Dave put her stuff back in the case!". Dave duly repacked my case and I was sent on my way. Of course as was traditional for railway employees I had a good supply of ciggies at the bottom of my case for reselling when I got back home.
My grandparents worked for the railway throughout the war.. both based at Euston. I still think of them almost every day. Nan would pick me up from school on Wednesdays in her beige Aquascutum overcoat. We'd go to Selfridges to buy the best marbles... clearies, shooters and onionskins.
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Either get a proper bike or buy a car you lazy bastards.
I have a '60's vélo Solex. What do you think about that MikefuckingD?
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That might be going a bit too far Frank. Just kick him in the cunt and I'm sure we can find room for you in our little beach hut.
That might be going a bit too far Frank. Just kick him in the cunt and I'm sure we can find room for you in our little beach hut.
I would lie low behind the back seats of his Range until the chino/shirt wearing pleb appeared. At knifepoint, I will direct him to your windswept fucking hell-hole by the sea. Whilst you sit up on the kitchen worktop.. spread-eagled and knicker-less, Mr G and I will deal with him by mobile judas cradle. Face fucking will naturally follow... hubby permitting.
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We often go to a mainly German resort in Melonaras. Its immaculate, the staff are fantastic, as are the waiters etc. We are lucky (????) as we have Gerry friends and can speak a little ourselves.They charge you an arm and a leg for it though. I'm not a fucking snob as you know, but I could get a holiday a few miles away in Playa del Ingles for a quarter of the price. But I enjoy getting fucking toasted, making a cunt of myself in loud drunken German, and have everyone badmouth the sausage suckers, thinking me as one of them. (must be the toothbrush moustache from when I was a Sparks fan)
Very much the nearly man, Jackie. Champagne taste.. beer money.... fat wife.
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This is just fucked up. I can't be arsed
Fat fingered idiot.
geezer birds
in The Corner
Posted
I recall some bird down on the coast who would prop her fat fucking self up on the kitchen counter, spread her legs and stuff sponge and Eccles cake up her hole until it bled.