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American Fucking Digger


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So, after my masturbatory frenzy that was Mary Poppins, I lazily channel-hopped after cleaning up the petroleum jelly and candle wax from my PVC Lederhosen and re-oiling my nipple-clamps and came across (no) this shite. Some clinically obese latent homosexual ex-fucking wrestler excavating some fucking parking lot in Detroit and finding shite (surprise, sur-fucking-prise) that some slack-arsed mechanic bastard dropped a few decades ago. The fat bearded bastard has all the social interaction and business acumen of Stephen Hawking's cathetar bag and sulks like a fucking child if his geophysical machines don't yield the fucking Ark of the Covenant after any longer than 2 minutes study. I'd like to crudely de-limb the corpulent fucker, nail his screaming remains to a commercial air-conditioning unit, scythe his shrunken steroid-damaged bollocks into delicate slices and then quite calmly guillotine the lard-arsed bastard's face off... then set him on fire. Cilla Black's a cunt.

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