Cuntybaws

And when you get there, fuck off some more!

Not to mention Gordon "fucking" Ell.

I see the paedo in question was Welsh, as presumably was the mother. Who'd have thought it?

In their favour, at least the Mirror can spell "paedo".

Slightly tangential, but did you see the alleged misprint on the BBC news site about Farage's latest appointment?

Real vampires don't sparkle! Oh, sorry, I thought you said "shimmering".

For old time's sake, here's a picture of the Big Madonna With The Fallen Boobies.

Good fucking point, sir - we'll need a volunteer for a control experiment to work out where the cancer goes in the case of blow jobs. Magnus Pyke was a cunt.

...and wanking.

Shut up Ding!

Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, fucking stupid old trout! And Judith is no better. How the fuck does anyone so retarded and so gullible get to have £140k in loose change just lying around in the first place? I'm glad she'll be dead soon.

Taping a child to a wall? Sounds strangely familiar... Once again, Rick, not a real baby!

And here I thought - circling back triumphantly to the actual topic - that Toxie had just scalped Donald Trump.

Be careful what you wish for.

I suspect you'd be closer to Troma's business model, so don't give up the day jobs.

I see what you did there, en passant.

Where us civilised Europeans would nod for "yes", the sullen peoples of the subcontinent shake their heads instead, like our "no". You can see why there are so many incidents in the news there about women getting raped on buses.

And let me guess, it would take at least 3 years of working through the myriad HR policies on absence management and capability before you could rid of the cunt. After which he'd only sue you for unfair dismissal, and probably win. I liked it better in the olden days, when the landowner could just shoot a few peasants to set an example, and then shag their wives.

"What is a woman that you forsake her, And the hearth-fire and the home-acre. To go with the old grey Widow-maker?" Frank lied about the boat.

Oh dear, Mrs R, you see what happens when you argue with Snatch for too long? Fucking *YOU'RE*

The worst cunt these days for nodding and twitching and blinking and generally being a cunt is Faisal Islam. In the vast pool of shit that is Sky TV, he rises to the top like a little bobbing turd. Fucking talentless, no-mark guppy.

That Indian bloke, Michael Bates?

I'm cumming!

Ooh, I know that one - a nun with a javelin through her head.