Cuntybaws

Elmo's "handler", Kevin Clash, aka Mr Tickler.

Two "British" fighters have been killed by a drone strike in Syria. I don't remember the House of Commons voting for that but fuck it, I'll let them off this time. And what a brilliant fucking name - Reaper Drone. This is now my favourite thing.

Doug Richard; Cliff Richard. Coincidence or what?

Shakespeare, eat your fucking heart out! This is what "Othello" was lacking.

Did that say "back door activity" before you edited it?

So that's why he was too busy to do the Commonwealth Games. I'll give him the fucking Mo-Bot!

Getting drugged up with my trendy friends, they really dig me man and I dig them...

Yep, a US "child star", seen here with his fugly sister-pig Raini, The cynical MTV/Disney dollar machine needs to provide someone for fat Hispanic kids to vote for at the Kids' Choice awards.

Speaking of stupid cunts with stupid names, I give you Lizo Mzimba.

Annabel Tiffin, the square-faced woman. Stupid name, stupid cunt.

Fucking hell, he was 80. Where do the years go. PS Wouldn't "Ghost Town" have been a more appropriate tribute track?

Still number one on the Properkhunt Scale of Offensive Maladies TM

More than 30 cadets were injured in the traditional end-of-summer pillow fight at prestigious US military academy West Point. Many were left unconscious. Jesus fuck, no wonder they don't last long in an actual combat zone. Friendly fire training starts early with these cunts.

Is "bum fest" not all one word? Or at least hyphenated? Either way, it's a very fair point. PS "Manky" sounds a bit like "Minkey" - should we be worried?

I wouldn't put anything past the cunt who faked all those dinosaur fossils for a laugh!

Everybody says "racist" like it's a bad thing. If it wasn't for racism we would never have had such classic programs as "Till Death Do Us Part" or "Love Thy Neighbour".

A picture in the nomination would have been worth a thousand words, you bone-idle cunt. I wonder if she takes it up the wrong 'un?

If Christine's busy, I hear Dominique Strauss-Kahn isn't fussy.

There you go, Pen, and what a cunt she is.

Mmmmm, pie...

Choked to death by shit - what a poetic way for a Norwich fan to go. I wouldn't like to be the bloke from CSI Norfolk who inherited that crime scene. It's a difficult enough job there at the best of times when everyone has the same DNA, and dental records are useless when no cunt has any teeth.

Sounds familiar. Don't get me wrong, I love my old mum, but they didn't just put "matricide" in the OED to fill up some more space.

Dale Winton beat you to it.

You filthy fucking cunt, where are your standards? Being soulless isn't a drawback per se, I suppose, but this cunt must have a fanny like a punched lasagna.

Fucking hell, Bill, you really have the most appalling luck when it comes to encountering tedious cunts with no social skills and a total lack of any redeeming features. Do you work in I.T.? On a perhaps-unrelated note, where did that cunt Richie get to?