Jiggerycock

Neither It should be '....you well-hung love-Albatross'

'..for what T.H.R.U.S.H is an acronym' you ignorant cunt. Ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.

....And they're calling him a gutless wimp! Guy must have the fortitude (and quite probably, the wedding tackle) of an Ox to have gone there. Respect is due!!

Charity fundraising - like Porn, God and The Poor - is omnipresent, burying it's way insidiously into every crevice of our lives. Walk down any high street and your assaulted by 'Chuggers' faux-bonhomie oozing from every pore as they try to horn you up about the perils facing the South Mollucan shrimp as it's natural habitat is destroyed by an uncaring world and how you can turn this around by giving your bank details to a complete stranger. Turn on the telly and there's Ewan Macgregor or that other Jock clitoris Tennant, doing their best 'emote for RADA' bit to camera, trying to chisel £2 a month from you. The Internet then. Gotta be safe there surely? Nope, as we have duly established. Cunt off Google!! I will not share! I refuse to nurture! Donating to anything can suck my cock for posterity! ....and take Geldof and Bono with you whilst you're about it!

I heard this one on the radio and, whilst I usually like a bit more meat on my nomination (that's not a euphemism), one can't help but give a wry nod to Brother Pissflaps opening assertion. Where, indeed, does one start with this smorgasbord of weapons-grade cuntery?

....... The nick is surrounded by a veritable shantytown of commercial units which is well known as the beating heart of Britain's dodgy imports Yes. It's called 'Manchester'.

Are we talking about the real meaning of 'liberal'? Believers in small government, free enterprise and general freedom? Or are we using it in the brain dead manner that most idiots tend to use it, with 'lefties', 'luvvies' or 'Grauniad' usually following quickly on to further highlight their idiocy? You know, the term that they have been fed by Talksport and some snide Yank rhetoric and have decided to use at every opportunity, despite the term really meaning the virtual opposite of what they foolishly intend it to. I think we should be told.

Another bullshit lifestyle statement to go with jailhouse tattoos, thick necks and gold chains. We really are a nation of fucking thick cunts aren't we?

I blame that Jeremy Corbyn!!

'Nikita' of course, being a man's name.

It's back! The 'Sunday Times 'Lifestyle' supplement bought to the cathode ray, via the chin-stroking, detached, wonderment of Kevin McCloud - man, who, if told the funniest joke ever, would stand there, arch his eyebrows and go 'That's terribly amusing'. Once more, a bunch of Home Counties 'Piers and Jocasta's' (or increasingly, 'Isaacs and Quentin's) - never subsistence farmers in sub-Saharan Africa - get their time in Pseuds Corner, via the mechanism of turning £1 million into a pile of shit that represents, apparently ' a finely tempered modality, completely at ease with the Zeitgeist' or something. I fucking LOATHE this pile of 90 ft Artwank

This is really interesting. Shouldn't we, firstly as Cunts Cornerers and secondly as predominantly clean-nobbed blokes, be celebrating our common love of parking our old chaps in tight warm places, jiggling them around a bit, prior to sending mother nature's silver seed to their new homes in the sun? Shouldn't we be giving a resounding high, hard one to the likes of Putin, ISIS and all those dogmatic cunts who think it's cool to tell us who we can and can't fuck? Might it not be time for an extremist Liberal posse to come in (or mince in) all guns blazing, going 'Fuck you Putin, Fuck you ISIS, double-fuck you Richard Littlejohn. No one wins unless we all win so get the trains running on time, the literacy levels of our kids up and our Armed Forces in decent shape and stop tut-tutting outside our bedrooms - shitheads!' Just a thought.

Tony Blair Tony Blair a step closer to going up against a War Crimes Commission in the Hague now.

Great nom! They only made 50 pence pieces that shape so they could get them out my granny's hands with a spanner.

Fuck you ! Get your own nomination!

Thinking that a flash of cleavage (because men are all mollified by tits, aren't we?) and the attitude they can buy and sell your life for the price of their shitwipes, will get them where they need to go in life. Newsflash. Some blokes aren't led around by their cocks and for those that are, there will always be another, younger, more attractive, more pneumatically-breasted, or failing that, more downright conniving, woman prepared to forget about the sistahood. So maybe it's worth investing in personality, education, manners and general all-round 'depth' after all.

Tell you what, let's all go around in an Asperger's-trance, repeating facts rather than engaging in dialogue or expressing opinions.......laminated of course, to avoid physical contagion with any carbon-based life forms. That way we can avoid giving offence to anyone, except those who long for a bit of colour and vitality in their lives.

I think something might have cocked him in the gob a bit too vigorously at some point. A bull elephant during Musth, at a guess.

He was allegedly queering up young boys at The Walton (On Thames) Hop disco during the 1970's and 1980's. This would have been about the time Sham 69 (from nearby Hersham) were making it big and I think the lyrics to their 1978 hit 'Hersham Boys' bears some scrutiny here: Living each day outside the law Trying not to do what we did before Country slag with the Bow Bell voice So close to the city we ain't got much choice and later.. It's down to the Hop for the local girls The're not beauty queens but they're our pearls But when you go to bed tonight Don't worry about us, we're alright All of which begs the question: did Jonathan King homm up Jimmy Pursey?

Face it, they're all cunts. Masters of talking half-an-inch of meaning into 30 feet of noise, pulling off the biggest confidence trick ever convincing their thick-as-mince supporters that they're some kind of uber Voodoo Witch doctor instead of a guesser with too much chutzpah. And as for their fucking 'mind-games'!! Certainly puts Colonel Kurtz to shame don't they? I'd like one of them to listen to a load of Mourinho / Ferguson / Wenger / Redknapp drivel and go "I'm going to rape you. I don't want the women. I want you. Mind-game THAT, motherfucker!"

You can lick 'em by smiling - or leave them to hang, apparently

" So let me get this straight. You want me to invest in a scheme whereby I don't get the snot pounded out of me by 'Mad Dog Jonson - The King of E-Wing' if I pay you a ton of money? For that reason - I'm in....please.....oh God please....."

Sever arteries - Not ties There's a fucking brilliant T-Shirt motif for you.

What, even shoving a turd back up your arse with a spatula?