Decimus

I doubt that Drew's even capable of pedalling one of those rickshaw things around London. Not only are his tiny, atrophied legs ill-suited for driving anything other than a Sinclair C5, the cunt is constantly off of his face on Frosty Jack's.

Stay the fuck out of this, Stubby.

Deal. I'll ask the darkie Uber driver for directions.

Speaking as a simple union rep with a clipboard and inflated opinion of himself, who doesn't own a shirt that hasn't been stained by baby sick and the mascara of a manically depressed wife, I really don't think I'd fit in, do you?

@Frank what are your thoughts on the events of today?

They wouldn't be seen dead with an ex-member of the Auxiliary Lancashire Special Needs Potato Peeling Yeomanry.

It's just a shame that none of you northern bottle-jobs ever had the gumption to stop beating the fuck out of your women and turn your aggression onto our many historical foreign invaders. As usual it was left to East-Anglian heroes such as Boudicca and Hereward the Wake to get stuck in and do the business. You useless cunts couldn't even stop the jocks from crossing the border and stealing your sheep for half the middle-ages.

I've got Bill ahead by a nose at the moment. It was almost a knock out blow when Roops delivered the BigBowBalls right hook alongside bringing up Bill's stint sex trafficking in the Far East. However, the boy came back with a killer riposte and seems to be on his way to a points victory.

Ding is on the beasts wing at Armley prison. Are you enjoying the battle between Roops and Bill? Who would you say is up at half time?

I'm not fussy. I've only got two rules. One is that you give me at least half of your like allocation for the week, and the other is that you hate Stubby and slander his children at least once a month.

I'm surprised you dare show your face around here after Dead-dadgate. What the fuck have you got to say for yourself?

Bill?

Not with all the rampant cock traffic that enters your arse it won't. Lol.

As a proud English nationalist, how do you feel about the fact that it's often reported that 70% of the land is still owned by 1% of the population, the majority of whom can trace their lineage back to Norman conquerors? Add to that the fact that the current royal family you wank your maggot over are the descendants of Krauts from a tin pot German electorate. Never mind recent immigration, you've been fucked over by foreigners for years.England for the English? I don't think so.

They weren't French. Fuck me, the last thing we need is Withers claiming some sort of overlordship because we never actually managed to throw off their yoke. Edit your nomination post haste, you Ken Barlow loving slag.

"Rather be"? You are! Lol.

It's good to see you back and singing from the same hymn sheet as me, my plastic brother. If you need any back up, light up the sky with the shamrock sign and I'll come running, green painted cock in hand and wailing 'Danny Boy' in a Cuchulainnesque fit of berserker rage. Now finish this fat cunt.

Check your pigeon hole. New orders were posted this afternoon and includes a list of new targets and helpful information regarding what to do when a mark such as Stubby gets over familiar. Also, I've been scheduled to log into the Bill account this evening at seven, but I've got a prior engagement that completely slipped my mind. Can you cover? I realise you'll also be logged into the Punkape ID tonight, but if you just do the usual golf, gay, peasant etc cut and paste shit you can better focus on Bill.

Downs? You're placing your new alliance with Stubby at high risk with such vile attacks.

Hand in your badge and gun and get the fuck out of my town. You're done here.

I don't blame your teachers for their brutality. If I had to educate a pretentious, buck toothed little "Just William" cunt who insisted on wearing tight short-trousers regardless of the weather, I'd want to kick the fuck out of them too.

@Quincy Cockfingers ?

What a load of obsequious, cap-doffing, ingratiating, absolute fucking bollocks. Do you salute the Union Jack every time you're about to take a big fat cock up your arse? Idiot.

Hardly. Look at where the Empire has been and look at its legacy. Israel is a complete mess because of the British mandate and it's distinct lack of ability to handle Zionism. Cypus has the only divided capital city on the planet after a divide and rule policy by the British administration caused ethnic tensions between Greeks and Turks. The partition of India amounted to the displacement of millions of people and subsequent tensions between India and Pakistan, and nearly every African state that the British left has either descended into civil war or been brutalised by totalitarian rulers. Not to mention the open wound of Ulster caused by oppressive British policies. It wasn't perfect, and it didn't work, and you're a fucking idiot for suggesting that it did.