Frank

Jackie! I was convinced you were in the Grenfell. How close was it?

I'm sure there's much to tell and we're all excited. Pace yourself.

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/61f537df-95f2-42b2-9b7b-885fe3c583b1

Lighten up you flaky tart. Take the criticism like you would Eric's giant balls... on the chin.

It has been brought to my attention that you've PM'd my intellectual property to almost the entire membership. I was banned for over 4 months for writing the Jazz song, and rightly so. He might be the most mentally unbalanced cretin the site has ever seen, but he didn't deserve that.

I don't know what to say. It's rubbish.

With very little input from this end, you're already approaching stage 3. You do know that I will fuck you in the end, don't you?

Shut up you fucking idiot.

Evening Rev! I remember the show being a little tighter back in those days. Who'd imagine you'd be signing in six years later for a game of Flidspack.

I'm back in Cadiz next week for the season playing the 'Memories of the Alhambra' set. Come and see me in Vejer.

I really like you Olly... I certainly don't mean to be rude when I say that you've never once made me laugh. But it's true, and I think there might be others who feel the same.

I reckon at least half the membership have been sitting in all day awaiting my return.

Heading west along the A303 this evening, passing Stone Henge with the most incredible sunset. This came on the radio and I thought of you...

You're the only one who hasn't celebrated my return. Hurts.

Drinks?

Patience my boy. If you can't wait, I'm at the Murray/Paire match right now.. 5 rows above the royal box, slightly left of centre. Blue hat. BBC2

I'm not really interested. Sorry.

Stop procrastinating you dopey council tart. Get it done.

'Scary. Also if anything unusual does happen to myself or any of my personal friends or family I can assure you I'll do everything in my power to find you and have you prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law'. Don't worry baby, you won't feel a thing.

This poor man has lost his life. What are you thinking gyps?

Charming.

Jazz you really are a truly horrible fucking thing.

Writing the Jazz song was hilarious. I laughed so hard I farted when singing it back to myself.

Sorry.

Jesus christ bubble, your stupidity knows no boundaries. Of course it was mine.