King Billy

I’m ahead of the curve Doc (as usual). Word on the Shankhill Rd. is that an AI cyborg calling himself Imam Ian al Paisley, with realistic Islamic beard, sandals and a six year old wife will be turning up anyday soon to announce the immediate end of the ‘fire and brimstone’ era and the introduction of ‘Sharia law’ to set the oppressed bible thumping Protestants free.at last. The Loyalist Club in Rumfort St. has already applied for planning permission to be remodelled in the style of The Kaaba. The Shankhill Butchers will be spinning in their graves if they’re looking down (or up depending which foot one happens to kick with). 🇬🇧NO SURRENDER🇬🇧 ALLAH AKBAR LOL

🎶And it’s on 9/11 I like to wear the burka my mother wore🎶

A fair point, but as far as I know there’s still no actual video evidence of Stephen Hawking ever losing a game of pool on Epstein Island. Swings and roundabouts.

They’ll get nothing from me if they do Doc. I’ve converted to Islam over the New year and can’t wait for the 72 virgins and permanent boner when I pop my clogs (sorry sandals, I’m still not quite up to speed with the flying carpet bollocks) and ‘head off’ (no pun intended) upstairs for eternity.

I’m liking the cut of your jib Greg.

🤣👍

Idiot

Your round.

Harold the guesser was never right.

Still doing the ‘poppers’ Panzybender?

‘Central beating’

“And then as if by magic, Mr Pen appeared. Fuck off.

December in London ‘flogging dead trees’ (as The Vulcan likes to say), then Christmas and New Year frantically counting the cash and trying (with my limited ability as a ‘thicko’) to work out whether or not I’ve earned enough to possibly survive until next Christmas on the proceeds of my annual three weeks of what to me is extremely hard graft. At the moment it’s looking like I’ll just about be able to make it till late November.

My entire adult life has been a Club 18/30 holiday that most mere mortals wouldn’t have the stamina or libido to keep up with.

Taylor won over two hundred professional titles…..16 x worlds, 17 x masters, 11 x grand slam championships, 16 x players championships, 6 x Premier league etc etc etc. and he didn’t even turn professional till he was almost 30. Humphries is 29 in a couple of weeks btw. No comparison.

Don’t panic. He’ll fuck off when the piss seeps through the mattress onto his face.

Six months a slave

Are you planning to donate the right one too (if the circumstances required it) Ed?

I wouldn’t fuck the ugly cunt, not even now that it’s dead.

Luke Humphries is a great player but tbh he is no Taylor. He’s won four titles in a row but he’s been around for a while, and while he’s the main man at the moment he’s still about a hundred ranking titles to go till he’s even close to equalling The Power’s tally. No one will ever dominate again like he did.

Panzy my perfect set of very expensive implants will outlast me, and definitely outlast your mouthful of wobbly, crooked, Shane McGowanesque crumbly old tombstones. I hear the GPO building in O’Connell St. is now a mosque. What has happened to the Irish fighting spirit that you lot used to keep going on about when we were trying to civilise and educate you not so long ago? Allah Ahkbar!

No one will ever come close to the achievements of Phil Taylor and Ronnie O Sullivan in their respective sports imo, and Ronnie is still winning and ranked No 1 after 30 years.

🎶Panzy called when he got the word. He said ‘I suppose you’ve heard? Our new neighbour is Ali’ 🎶 🎶So I rushed to the window and looked outside, and I could hardly believe my eyes, as a big removal van pulled up onto next doors drive🎶 🎶Oh I don’t know why he’s going to need that chicken and that goat. I guess he’s got his reasons but I just don’t want to know cos for 24 hours I’ve been living next door to Ali🎶 🎶For 24 hours he’s been emptying the van, 15 wives in burkas a machete and Koran, so I’ve gotta get used to living next door to Ali🎶 🎶He groomed and befriended some kids in the park. I heard them shouting Allah Ahkbar, with Ali🎶 🎶Now he walks through the door with his head held high, then gropes his cousin whose also his wife, cos for him polygamy and incest Is justified🎶 🎶Now Ali says I must comply with Sharia, maybe not now but within a few years ( when all of my common law rights have disappeared)🎶 🎶Now for several hours he’s been fingering me Nan (just another practice that he’s brought from Pakistan), but I’m starting to get used to living next door to Ali🎶 🎶Right now on the news they are showing his photo. He’s mowed down loads of people in a black Fiat Punto. For 24 hours he must have had it planned, now I’ll probably never see him cos they’ve put him on remand, so I’d better get used to not living next door to Ali🎶 Fuck off.

Allright lads?

Michaela Van Gerwin V Erica Bristow (obviously a transgender hologram) battling it out on stage for the title of ‘Champion (ess) of the metaverse 2024’ (both disqualified afterwards for being white and the title posthumously awarded to George Floyd).