Guest Wizardsleeve Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Wimbledon is a waste of perfectly good time. It isn't the same without fit Russian birds grunting with every stroke, and the breeze flapping their skirts for the cheapest of thrills. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Any shit mail I get I stick it all in a pre-paid envelope sent by those insurance companies and send it to them. That includes menus. Childish I know.childish works for me, i like the cut of your gib, will start this with immediate effect Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Although I am not really a fan of the tennis, unless it's royal tennis with Punkapes' pals. I think we should embrace Wimbledon for what it is and be thankful that this Is still aired live on a regular channel and not pay per view or reserved for Sky twats. Murdoch you're a fucking howlin' mad moron Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Talking of dress codes......I have been invited to the annual summer ball of the premature ejaculation society. I rang up to find out the dress code. I was reliably notified......"don't worry Sir, just come in your pants"Posh people don't come; they arrive Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Henry VIII played tennis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 8, 2015 Report Share Posted July 8, 2015 Henry VIII played tennis.He played head tennis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 9, 2015 Report Share Posted July 9, 2015 Andy Murray to play Roger Federer.I think even on the Wimbledon scale of uptight bastards this match and anything relating to it will be rather short on laughs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 Andy Murray to play Roger Federer.I think even on the Wimbledon scale of uptight bastards this match and anything relating to it will be rather short on laughs.Murray's not doing so well. Will it be his arm or leg he starts grabbing to prepare the ground for the inevitable injury excuse if he loses? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colonelkurtz Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 And carry your own towels instead of throwing it to some ball-boy or girl then demanding it after every shot, you filthy, sweaty bastards....... and there's never ever a please , thank you or kiss my arse from the ignorant fucks. Any ballboy/girl would be quite justified in gobbing in the drinks bottles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 ...... and there's never ever a please , thank you or kiss my arse from the ignorant fucks. Any ballboy/girl would be quite justified in gobbing in the drinks bottles.They don't even nod, just a look towards them that says 'you're here to do what I tell you, you little shit. Think yourself lucky to even be here.'Stuck-up, pompous, robotic, personality-free bastards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 They don't even nod, just a look towards them that says 'you're here to do what I tell you, you little shit. Think yourself lucky to even be here.'Stuck-up, pompous, robotic, personality-free bastards.Hang on.... Is this Mrs Murray we're talking about? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 Hang on.... Is this Mrs Murray we're talking about?I believe her meal-ticket, I mean her son, lost.I'll give the post-match interview a miss, that much misery I prefer to save for a dentist's appointment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 I've always had a small desire to release a labour of moles onto center court one night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 I've always had a small desire to release a labour of moles onto center court one night.Release a labour of moles?Don't even think about denying that's your code for a wank, you filthy fucker! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 Ive been watching the Tour de France while on my exercise bike. Great for fitness and toning the legs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 Ive been watching the Tour de France while on my exercise bike. Great for fitness and toning the legsAt least we don't have to suffer Bradley Wiggins reluctant hero fucking bollocks this year, that cunt won't be missed.I'm sure we can put up with Mark 'y'know' Cavendish. At least there's always a chance he'll swear on live tv! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted July 10, 2015 Report Share Posted July 10, 2015 Great for fitness and toning the legsPictures for proof Gyps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted July 12, 2015 Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 I'm very very disappointed. I watched Jimmy Carr play tennis against some Serb and not once during the whole match did he tell a joke or get involved with banter with members of the audience. At the end he just put his tennis bat in his bag and fucked off.At least Peter Kaye would have told the audience about booking a holiday on teletext or lead a few people round the court to "Is this the way to Amarillo" I'm not watching him play tennis again. Not until he gets his act together. The Serb bloke won a big fuck off gold trophy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted July 12, 2015 Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 I've always had a small desire to release a labour of moles onto center court one night.I knew there was something more to my dislike of moles than just the hills the cunts push up on my lawn. Velvety lefty fuckers, death to them all! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted July 12, 2015 Report Share Posted July 12, 2015 I knew there was something more to my dislike of moles than just the hills the cunts push up on my lawn. Velvety lefty fuckers, death to them all!your avatar is giving me a funny feeling......must be the vertical bacon sandwich. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
applescruff14 Posted July 2, 2016 Report Share Posted July 2, 2016 Big chance for Murray to win Wimbledon, bloke who knocked out Djokovic reminds me of Graeme Swann. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 2, 2016 Report Share Posted July 2, 2016 10 minutes ago, applescruff14 said: Big chance for Murray to win Wimbledon, bloke who knocked out Djokovic reminds me of Graeme Swann. Nearly as boring as the cricket Apple. Murray has the eyes of a murderer is as interesting as a Christian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
applescruff14 Posted July 2, 2016 Report Share Posted July 2, 2016 Just now, Gurt said: Nearly as boring as the cricket Apple. Murray has the eyes of a murderer is as interesting as a Christian I don't mind watching Wimbledon, he won't get a better chance than this for a second Wimbledon title. Hopefully he will play the Graeme Swann lookalike in the final. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 2, 2016 Report Share Posted July 2, 2016 1 minute ago, applescruff14 said: I don't mind watching Wimbledon, he won't get a better chance than this for a second Wimbledon title. Hopefully he will play the Graeme Swann lookalike in the final. Hopefully some fucking crank will jump out of the crowd and do a Monica Seles and stab the prick. If only Thomas Hamilton had a bit more ammo at Dunblane then we wouldn't have to endure this boring prick Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
applescruff14 Posted July 2, 2016 Report Share Posted July 2, 2016 17 minutes ago, Gurt said: Hopefully some fucking crank will jump out of the crowd and do a Monica Seles and stab the prick. If only Thomas Hamilton had a bit more ammo at Dunblane then we wouldn't have to endure this boring prick I was just reading about that Monica Seles stabbing, the nutter that did it only got a two year suspended sentence. She won the Australian open in 1996 three years after the attack but that was as good as it got. Could have been the greatest ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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